S.P.A.K.A. (スパカ）

Jpop Meets Postwar Optimism

2009-10-13T23:46:00.002-05:00

I know I've mentioned SPEED on this blog more than a couple of times, and if you're not familiar with them, well, that's your problem. A group that paved the way for young girl groups, a force to be reckoned with, and also, I've heard that they sold a few records. Well, they're back as adults after some years off, but what do ya think they did in the meantime? Sip lemonade and hang out at the old-folks'-home? Hardly...

After SPEED broke up in 1999, popular member Hiroko Shimabukuro said, "okay, let's just shorten my name to 'Hiro', and I'll take 'solo-careers' for $500, Alex." She did pretty well with that, showing a more mellow side, yet coming back with an ass-kicker or two just to show that she still had it in her.

*Then* someone came up with the bright idea that she should do an album of jazz standards, in English, no less. Called "Coco d'Or", the album was released in 2004. Rather than summarize the album I thought it'd be interesting to go track-by-track, because I don't think anyone else has done the world this favor.

First, though, to give you an idea of the sound of this record (very big band), do enjoy this video. Hiro looks damn good in this, so watch carefully:

The album starts with Route 66, made famous by Nat King Cole in 1946. The song did much to popularize the nearly-transcontinental road, which only exists in fragments today. SPEED did a couple of videos in the Southwest, so it's very possible that Hiro has seen a piece of the actual Route 66; but the execution of the lyrics makes it sound like she's learned the song phonetically, rather than knowing the song inside and out. Still, with an open mind and a love of Japanese girls in general, it's hard not to fall in love with her awkward pronunciations of American places, like Missouri (she says 'mih-ZAH-ree') and San Bernardino ('SAAN-baa-na-DEE-no'). Believe me when I say that this is a good record for travelling.

Next is Avalon, a standard since Al Jolson recorded it in 1920. This version takes a more modern swing feel, as most jazz combos have done in history, and it ends with Hiro holding the last note for over 10 seconds.

And the Melody Still Lingers On (Night in Tunisia) follows, a much more recent song by Chaka Khan (I can't seem to place the exact year). It takes the melody of a 1942 Dizzy Gillespie composition and adds nostalgic lyrics about how the song changed the face of popular music. It name-drops a number of jazz celebrities: "Dizzy [Gillespie] and Bird" [Charlie Parker], "Max [Roach] and Miles" [Davis], "The Duke [Ellington] and The Prez" [Lester Young], "from [John] Coltrane to Stevie" [Wonder, I assume], although I've heard a version that substitutes "Louis" [Armstrong] for "Stevie". So if you've ever wanted to hear a Jpop star talk about the jazz greats of old, this is your song. The middle of the song features a scat section where Hiro does both the melody and the harmony, and just one Hiro is quite powerful -- layer that voice, and it's divine.

Free is a cover of a 1977 DeNiece Williams song, originally a soulful R&B tune, arranged here as a peppy big band number. There's not much to dislike as Hiro switches between time signatures and styles effortlessly.

Fly Me to the Moon was written in 1954 and has been recorded by a number of vocalists since. Arguably the most well-known recording was of Frank Sinatra in 1964. Although the song has been ubiquitous, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that the only reason I now know the words is because of the Coco d'Or version. But the same holds true with a lot of the songs on this record. I might have known a chorus or two, but it took Hiro to get me to pay attention. Go figure.

Summertime, the infamous 1935 George Gershwin composition from "Porgy and Bess", covered by hundreds over time, if not more, still sounds fresh after all these years when Hiro sings along. The backbone of this version is a very "Dave Matthews"-sounding electric-acoustic riff, with lots of arpeggios and some string-slaps for percussive effect. Another scat section is included which ends in a crashing-down-the-stairs resolution. Hiro thinks your ma is "good lookin'," so that's a plus.

The Face I Love, sorry, can't hit you with a lot of history on this one, but appears to have been written by Marcos Valle, in this case an upbeat samba which invites you to "think of things like daffodils and peaceful sheep on blue-green hills" and if you do, "every lovely view introduces you to the face I love". Which is a sweet sentiment not unlike many Jpop songs.

Next, The Girl from Ipanema may be a bit grating to some but I actually love the original recording, probably more than this version. For good measure, this version brings the only other vocalist on the entire record, a soft-spoken gentleman who gets the honor of singing the Portuguese lyrics, as any respectable cover of this song would warrant. Oddly, Hiro repeats a mistake over and over, instead of the word 'she', it's phrased as "when SHE'S passes each one SHE'S passes goes 'Ahh'." Strange, but you get used to it.

It's Only A Paper Moon, written in 1933, covered by that many artists, a song that refuses to die. Hiro lends her talents to this song nicely. The text of this song refers to the world as a collection of fake reality and cheap thrills, but, of course, "it wouldn't be make-believe if you believe in me." Fall in love with Hiro and your life suddenly has meaning.

Orange Colored Sky, presented in video-form above, is one of my more favorite tunes from this album. Like "Paper Moon", the lyric refers to living in a fantasy world, where the sky is inexplicably orange (later it also features purple stripes and pretty green polka-dots), until "wonderful *you* came by". This song was another popularized by Nat King Cole in 1950, co-written by Milton DeLugg, who wrote "Hooray for Santa Claus," the theme from the classic kid's movie (and MST3K episode) "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians". I really like the fantastical lyrics, along with the invocation of such words as "Flash! Bam! Alakazam!"

The Very Thought of You can be quite a tearjerker if you're in the mood for it. Sultry, lingering, and featuring a soprano sax solo (thankfully *not* Kenny G), it's a mile away from the Bing Crosby original of 1934. Were it not for the prolific history of this song it might be easy to mistake this as a song written expressly for Hiro. She very much owns this version of the song.

Spain (I Can Recall) is a Chick Corea/Al Jarreau composition which begins a very gloomy sung intro, "Yesterday; just a photograph of yesterday..." about a love gone south, which then has the singer dreaming about being "lovers once again". This intro features Hiro singing in a very low register, probably the lowest she's been on record. But suddenly the song changes gears and over an upbeat Spanish-style rhythm, Hiro sings about those golden days in Spain where she "did love and adore" the subject of the song. Wow, too bad I was battling a vicodin addiction at the time, because that sounds like a wonderful affair, and I would have remembered it otherwise.

In 1943, Tin Pan Alley composer/lyricist Cole Porter wrote You'd Be So Nice To Come Home To, and as its title implies, it's a gushy song about a hopeful love affair. While this review is quickly becoming little more than a "same to you, Hiro", let me just say that the sentiment is returned. Hiro *would* be a welcome sight upon returning to the homestead, "under stars chilled by the winter" or "an August moon burning above".

I Can't Give You Anything But Love (...baby), was written in 1928 by a possible several people, and has been covered a great number of times. Nearly every line in the song ends with a tag of "...baby" and Hiro sings the song in a very carefree and coy fashion. Just think of a typical platinum blonde postwar big band singer winking into a crowd of overexcited and underappreciated men, and this is Hiro here. The way she sings it's almost implied that she's wearing a feather boa in the studio. Hilariously, Cary Grant and Katherine Hepburn sang an intentionally poor version of this song to a leopard on a rooftop (named "Baby") in the 1938 film Bringing Up Baby (which, if you're interested, the scene can be found here).

You're Everything is a song apparently originally recorded by the Chick Corea group Return to Forever. Like "Spain" it's an upbeat Latin feel that is easily accessible to the listener.

Calling You, a.k.a., theme from Bagdad Café, originally recorded for the 1987 film, has been covered by artists as varied as Barbara Streisand, Celine Dion, and Jeff Buckley. Hiro puts her own laid-back spin on the iconic song, where the chorus could be easily overdone (think of Whitney Houston's effective-fire-alarm "I Will Always Love You") but she sings the "I-I-I... am calling you" in a breathier tone than the original, and we all know that she *could* do it in a screamier tone.

Overall, this record delivers. Presenting a total of 16 "standards" and nailing damn-near *every* one of them -- especially for someone whose first language isn't the one being sung -- is an incredible accomplishment. I'm so, so impressed with Hiro's vocal talent after hearing this record and its follow up 'Coco d'Or 2' (which takes on more modern compositions) that SPEED recordings are, to me, bullet-proof at this point.

Hiro began singing publicly by *at least* the age of 9 (I tried to find the youTube video, with no result), and has been consistently praised as a competent vocalist ever since. This album is far from being an egotistical display, without the stuffiness that most jazz albums present, and it impresses me with how much it *grooves*. From pretty to powerful, and all-points-in-between, the only conclusion is that Hiro can perform, and she cares about little else. There's no need to reinvent herself or try to become an icon -- those weren't the goals of this record. Sometimes you have to remind yourself, "this is the girl that used to be in SPEED" and after that, you think, "damn! Good job outta you!"

What really rings true is that the "old-fashioned" things, like songs and films, on the surface, tend to be tamer than anything created recently. But from an adult perspective, many of those have deeper implications than anything hot-off-the-press. Some of the old black-and-white films are more offensive, show more drunken behavior, and have cigarette-smoking as a birthright, untamed beyond any single-etendre work being filmed today. Such is the case for these classic songs. When Hiro sings, "you'd be so nice by the fire" she sure ain't talkin' about eating cheese cubes. Nudge, nudge, know-wut-I-mean?

(Extra-special thanks to the editors of Wikipedia (yeah, yeah, it's all *lies*) for help in researching this broad tapestry of recordings, youTube for providing proof for some of these legendary previous recordings, and as a footnote... Coco d'Or recordings *can* be found on the internet, if you just know where to look. Eventually, you'll feel guilty and buy them outright.)

LA Story VII: AX and the Deathly Hallows

2009-10-05T23:45:00.001-05:00

With little exception, I'm sure that nearly every Morning Musume fan at AX went there for the purpose of seeing Morning Musume; be it their performance, or the Q&A session, or to see them up close and get an autograph. Obviously, those were my reasons as well -- not to finally get a chance to eat at the acclaimed California Pizza Kitchen, or to ride the elevator used in the movie "Forget Paris", though I did both.

So to say the least, I was excited about nothing more than seeing Morning Musume in Los Angeles this summer. But as I boarded that first airplane I couldn't have felt farther away from idol culture. All the formalities of security checks, all the power of jet fuel and airline corporations, all the mayhem which goes on at airports like LAX and DFW... there just didn't seem to be any connection to 9 very pretty girls who I've watched grow up from my living room.

And yet, all the research and planning that I'd done before the trip, to make sure that I got where I needed to be to witness the Expo, paid off. As we drove into downtown L.A. I saw more than a handful of sites which were unmistakeably linked with my adoptive neighborhood, and I knew I was getting close, but just how close?

There are very, very few people in my hometown who are of Japanese descent -- a sizeable amount of Asians, but very few Japanese -- so if and when I see them, they stick out like a sore thumb. In turn, even though the first glimpse I got of Morning Musume was at the Opening Ceremonies in poor lighting, they were unmistakeable. To me, they appeared *unapologetically* Japanese (with, of course, the exception of JunJun and LinLin, the Chinese members, but they know how to play ball). There was something intangibly noble and elegant (and, to be honest, from my perspective, downright freaky) about their appearance, the way they carried themselves, and how they interacted with each other. They were clearly visitors from a strange land, and although their faces had been burned into my memory for years, by showing up in person they lost that normalness and became exotic to me, again.

I try not to play favorites with any idols because when I listen to an album like Platinum9, just surfing the aural waves from start to finish, there's little room to complain. If I've got the time, I'm spinning the whole disc, skipping nothing, and every performer has her place.

But when they showed up in front of me without introduction I recognized some more than others. Koha, I picked her out right away. Sayu, with noticeable white pom-poms on each pigtail, was easy to keep an eye on. Takahashi, I could just tell, because that body haunts my dreams. And Eri; back in the day, she was the last one whose name I could keep straight, but now I could spot her from a mile away. ("Hatachi," good God...)

For some reason, I just got confused at first when I saw JunJun, thinking, 'they've got *2* Reina's now?" "Is that Nacchi?" "I thought Kaori graduated..." But in my defense, your average American would have trouble distinguishing any 9 Asian girls, let alone the 25 infamous members throughout history, so I just kept staring until I figured out who she was. I ain't got nothing against her, she just got lost in a sea of pretty Asian girls within my memory bank.

I've never owned a photobook. I have a few Morning Musume singles but bought them all used. The *one* H!P concert DVD I own is "Matsuura Aya/W/Melon Kinenbi", and I've watched it maybe once, and even then watched only a few songs. Most of the Morning Musume songs I have on my iPod were bought from the Apple Store. These are all things I realized while I stared starstruck at the girls while they were a short distance from me and hundreds of other fans at AX.

I've written about them a number of times, starting with Koha oh-so-long-ago. And as I've said, it's hard to find anyone around here who might give damn-number-one about them or anything Japanese. So before I went to AX I rightly considered myself a pretty big fan. After all, I'd listened to practically every song they ever made (and it's a huge catalog, still growing), tried to take in as many Utaban apppearances as they'd ever done, and even watched Haromoni more than a couple of times. And, oh yeah, I've seen *every* Ayaka's "Totsugeki Eikaiwa!!!" segment, as well.

But without Kayo Aiko, I'd know nothing of Japan. For me, there'd be no Perfume, Capsule, SPEED, Pink Lady, The Peanuts, Yumin, Dream, Nanase Hoshii and Seventh Tarz Armstrong, Nagasawa Nao, Saito Michi, SMAP, W, Minimoni, Tanpopo, Biyuden, Berryz Kobo, C-ute, GAM, Matsuura Aya, Hangry & Angry, Kirarin, Buono!, Hiro, Coco d'Or, or Sharam Q... and without Ms. Kayo Aiko, I'd certainly know nothing of Morning Musume.

And if it was Ms. Kayo Aiko who drew me into the world of Jpop and taught me most of the Japanese words I know, it was those Morning Musume television appearances that really got me over the headache of listening to spoken Japanese, clueless, until I began to break it down into words and really understand what was being said.

Obviously, there's been no official tally, but around my hometown it seems that there is no bigger Morning Musume fan than me. But at AX it was all-too-obvious. At the Q&A, listening to all the on-mic fans gushing and asking for things like the 'Atto Pose' (still, no clue on that), it finally hit me... I really *am* more of a casual Morning Musume fan.

Still, seeing them in person was a whole different experience. My mind tried to form words to explain what was happening. "They are *right* there," I kept telling myself, "*Right* there." At the Opening Ceremonies, the Q&A, the concert, I stared in disbelief. And though they put in their time, and I had plenty of opportunities to relish their presence, I felt that even *if* the moment lasted another fifty years, it still wouldn't be enough. I would always want more.

In those moments my thoughts strayed to all facets of fandom, be it for Aiko or Mi-chan, Perfume, or Urbangarde.

What really struck me is that it's completely impossible to 'get inside' an idol. And I mean that in every sense of the word, not just the obvious (male) sense. There's just no getting inside there. As a 'normal' person, you'll never know the joy (or torture) that these idols face in their lives. You'll never be able to think like them, and in your lifetime you will never come close to knowing what being an idol truly means. You can try to stare a hole through Koha (and believe me, I fuckin' tried...) but in the end, it doesn't change her, it won't magically alter your lifestyle, and it doesn't bring you any closer to divinity. I mean, damn the fact that it doesn't, but it just doesn't. All you can hope to do is stare in admiration (as I and many others did) and hold on to that memory.

This is not to say that idols do not have a profound impact on our lives as fans. But after travelling 2,000-some miles just to see them, I was surprised to find out that the true soul-maintenance was not idol-spotting, but bonding with fellow fans. It seemed that no matter what side of the world we grew up on, how many years we've been alive, and despite the fact that we all had never spoken (at least not in real-life) prior to meeting up at AX, there were so many striking similarities between us all.

Until I saw the Momusu concert, it was only in legend that everyone got together, waved glowsticks, and screamed their heads off (to the beat) at a concert. Further on in the weekend, watching the "Miru, Aina Kase, and Yozuca*" mini-concert, it was the fan-bonding that really impressed me. And even at that small performance, it was touching how much everyone got into it. The idols -- all they do is dance around, look cute, and sing for a while, and yet our collective passion endures. We just can't wait for the next time we can all go nuts and jump around to a funky J-Beat.

The whole system parallels a Big Rock Concert where everyone hangs out in the parking lot until admission and cranks up the "rock-band-du-jour" on the the car stereo, getting pumped for the show. Sayu and Koha can hang out in Los Angeles for the rest of their lives and they'll never match the excitement that a group of fans (in Momusu's case, some 8,000 of them) can bring to a show.

What is also fantastic to know is that the girls probably had just as good of a time travelling to L.A. as we did. See this video, for example.

So after AX, we have all returned to our respective corners and have made our memories our own. But apparently it's become fashionable to bash fans who aren't in the same community, or on the same board as "the rest of us". This is an attitude we *do not need*, because it does not advance our cause. To simultaneously want to recruit other domestic fans, yet shun those who don't share our view exactly, is a contradiction.

Fans, there was never a better time to be inclusive.

Anyone who likes Morning Musume is a friend; even if my mortal enemy was in the crowd at the AX concert, it wouldn't have stopped me from enjoying the show. As an admitted casual fan, would you show me disrespect for enjoying the group in general?

I get the feeling from some facets that, yes, I neither know what I'm talking about, and that I should just shut up.

It almost makes me want to quit the blogging game altogether so that only "true fans" can evangelize H!P to the blind. Because clearly, I am not a "true fan" like they are.

But the idea that I'm less of a fan than someone who's known them for ten-years-plus, this is clearly a bigoted assumption. If you want Morning Musume to come back to the USA, frequently, you'll just have to admit that fans come in all shapes and sizes.

So, the last thing I may ever write about H!P (with the exception of the "Koha Kontest", stay tuned...) is that, no matter how the haters try and show off the ugly side of Risako, she still just looks like a normal (pretty) girl, no matter how ugly you'd like to think she might be.

Smugness / You Haven't Heard the Last of Me

2009-09-23T20:41:00.002-05:00

Just to let everyone know, L.A. Story Part 7 is in the works but it won't happen until at least next week. I've got some personal business to tend to and you'll just have to deal with it (as I will). Just wanted to let you know it's coming, I'm working on it, and it won't be too long.

In the meantime, I thought I'd assemble a quick guide to commenting (on any site) and I'll feel better about myself for trying. People of the internet, please try to avoid these common spelling mistakes in the future:

"Awful" is spelled with one 'L'.

"Definitely" contains the word 'definite' and you simply add "LY" to the end. Common misspellings include "definately", "defiantly" (unless you actually want to use the word "defiantly"), and "evar".

"Kudos" is spelled just like that. You'd think people would get *that* one right, after all, it's the name of a candy bar... which doesn't sell too well, so maybe that's why. But for all the "kutoes" and "cudoes" that I've read, damn, man... go to a convenience store once in a while! (The Brits might call it a 'Petrol Shop', but they might call it a 'Sir Chauncewell' for all I know.) By the way, the word "kudos" is singular, so you can say "much kudos" but not "many kudos".

If you're going to call someone a "loser", best not to spell it wrong -- mostly I see "looser", which is the opposite of "tighter", as in, "turn the screw to the left and it gets looser." -or- "Since I've been dieting, my pants have felt looser." Say, did anyone watch last week's episode of The Biggest Loser? Everyone's clothes seemed looser. If you didn't watch it, I think you're a loser. (Apparently I'm a loser.)

How about "your" when it's supposed to be "you're" ("you are"). "You're an idiot if you can't keep your grammar straight. Your comment seems irrelevant when you're clearly not capable of using the right words."

"Allot" means to give or apportion, as a share or task. It does not mean "many" as in "there are a lot of people misusing the word "allot". I should get a team together and allot some time to educate people on how to use the word correctly."

"Should have" should have been used whenever you see "should of". No further comment.

Except for, okay, I *do* feel better. Hang on, the best is yet to come.

Forget AX for a while, let's talk about Mi-chan.

2009-09-09T21:01:00.008-05:00

Ya know, it's just killing me to write all these AX posts without being able to gush about other celebrities who I *didn't* get to see but really wanna die trying to do so at some point.

You're all aware by now (please read the site if you aren't) that Ms. Kayo Aiko is my first and only true love when it comes to Japanese pop music. I could give my reasons here, but again, read my old posts, that'll learn ya. Aiko really seemed to be mad at me when I ventured into Kpop and Cpop (gee thanks, Tom) but I wonder how she'd feel if she knew I had the hots for one of her friends?

Well, I'm sure Aiko will be devastated to find out that I've formed a bit of a bond with her good friend Saito Michi, a.k.a., Mi-chan, whom I've mentioned in a few previous posts. Similar to Aiko, what was at first merely an infatuation with her good looks became a full-blown obsession (and I totally called *that* one) once I discovered her music, and her photobooks.

So, what the hell; eye candy, please:

(Beavis voice): "Hey, how's it goin'?" Let's get a little more risqué...

She's beeeautiful... one more, and:

Mi-chan, let's run away together, you and me.

All of this attractiveness gets more solidified after you've heard her music. You wouldn't think that a girl who gets *this* in-your-face -- here, try *this* one instead...

So, you wouldn't think that a girl who gets *this* in-your-face could sing these really wistful, sweet songs about finding dreams and true love, with a *little tiny* voice that's just addictive (although her speaking voice is rather full and husky, but I could again be confusing Koha with someone else).

So what, Aiko? I've a right to play the field on this one.

It's interesting, because Aiko and Michi are so similar; yet become polar opposites upon further examination. Aiko's a sweet, bubbly girl who goes for all-out cuteness, sings epic songs full of twists and turns, and seems to be very outgoing without a lot of self-confidence issues. And I rather like *that*, but...

On the other hand, Michi is a reserved and calm girl who goes for a quiet sort of beauty, sings simple and soft (but man, if they ain't awesome) songs, and seems almost shy to a fault. But, who's the one going 'round dressed in skimpy swimsuits, after all? Somehow, it's as if these two were twins of the opposite-sort, but which one is the evil twin?

So, if I may venture out slightly on a limb, here, it goes like this: Aiko is a sex kitten wrapped in a disguise of cuteness, while Mi-chan is cuteness-itself disguised as a total sex kitten. It's that simple. About them both, what's not to love?

So there you have it, and if anyone thinks I should go back to posting about AX, Ms. Kayo would like to point something out:

See? It says right there in "the rules" that I can write about whatever I want to on this site. Thanks, Ms. Kayo.

Lasto, let's see a bit more of Ms. Saito, shall we? After all my going on, it's nice to have a video to illustrate my point. By the way, two words: "bathtub sequence". Oh, and all the phrases that appear on the screen describe how I feel about Mi-chan at this point...

From here on.

L.A. Story, Part 6: "The Best Part of AX"

2009-09-05T21:05:00.007-05:00

Well, I'm quite relieved to have finished Parts 1 - 5, but the unfortunate truth is that, 1.) I ain't done yet; and 2.) these last two posts are supposed to be the most important posts of the whole series. So no bullets have been dodged just yet.

Of course on Saturday, we all partied after the Tsunku session and the Momusu autograph session. So next came (logically) Sunday, and that meant the last day of Anime Expo. By this point, I had accomplished my goal of seeing a Morning Musume concert (from a great vantage point) and failed wonderfully in getting a shot at singing to Tsunku. So what else was there to do?

In my opinion at the time, it wouldn't be much. So I decided not to charge my camera battery, and in doing so, missed out on some of the more memorable moments of the whole convention. I don't recall the main reason we headed down to the LACC on Sunday, other than that we were awake, and the convention was still going on. If I remember correctly we just headed down there to see if something interesting woud happen.

At the MangaGamer booth there was a 'mini concert' of three idols; Miru, Aina Kase, and Yozuca* (there is no footnote below, that's how she spells her name, apparently). And all the while a crowd assembled, waving battery-powered glowsticks and pumping their fists to the beat. Miru even taught us all a small call-and-response chant that was fun to yell at the appropriate moment. Seeing all those fans being so excited about this extremely small-time show was another very surreal moment for me, and I realized it would be just a short time before I was back amongst people who don't *do* that at concerts -- even large ones. So again, I'm not sure if I can attend another concert that doesn't involve audience participation.

The stars of the show played Jyan-ken (aka rock, paper, scissors) with the crowd and the winners were given special CD-R's with I-don't-know-what on them. But they were labeled by hand, apparently by the idols themselves. For a few pics of this event (including a picture of the 'special' CD), see Lampshade's post (lucky bastard!).

As that event was winding down I took a brisk walk to a place only a few booths away, where C-Zone was giving their 2nd (and last) concert. Yeah, finally, C-ZONE!!! Here they are, aren't they wunnerful?

We first heard about this new group from our new friend from New Orleans, Mage, right before the Momusu concert. As he was telling us about Sunday's C-Zone show, I'm thinking, yeah, sure, whatever. Of course, once the short Momusu show was over we had a taste for blood which could not be contained. So once we actually got to see C-Zone, I was all about it. They're all cute-as-buttons, and just by looking at them, you can tell that they're experts in Gregorian chant-style-music.

Well, you'd be surprised to find out that they actually sound a little more like a Jpop group, so of course I liked the music. But let's back up a bit. Before we saw the 3-idol concert, we gawked at C-Zone for awhile as they graciously took pictures with the normal folk... Moze was in line to get his picture taken, so I loaned him my camera, turned it on, and showed him how to shoot it. But before he could get to the front, my battery died. Worst. Camera moment. Ever. Totally my fault, btw.

But C-Zone had just started with their second concert as I returned to their booth, and I fittingly ran into Mage. He gave me a truncated history of the group between songs, and we watched as they did their (what was it, 3?) songs. They did some choreography, nothing *too* strenuous, as it was a very small stage, and a crowd gathered as the event went on. Because they weren't as popular as Morning Musume (a bit of an understatement), one could take pictures at will. Which I would have, if my camera was still working at that time.

But Mage and I clapped to the off-beat during every song, and everyone else stood and stared, or took pictures. It felt very awkward to be one of *two* people clapping along with the song, but it was called for, so dammit, I kept going.

Especially after the other idol show, just minutes before, where people were going nuts... why did none of the other people watching put any enthusiasm into it? They just stood there. I'm wondering if C-Zone was perturbed by this as well. (Hint to other audience members... at Jpop shows you're supposed to *participate*.)

The group gave a short introduction of themselves when the music was over, then invited a Q&A session, which didn't reveal very much about, well, anything really. "How do you like America so far?" Ummm, nobody claps during our songs? No, the *real* answer was more along the lines of, "It's great, I want to come back as soon as possible, I'm going to eat mountains of ice cream." (This is quite similar to what Koha said earlier in the week, so I might have gotten the two confused).

As they said their goodbyes, one by one, the girls choked up a bit, and the lovely Miu (the girl in the middle) decided that she wanted to cry about it, so their manager gave her a towel emblazoned with the C-Zone logo, and she dried her tears. I wondered aloud if I could somehow obtain that very towel, but it didn't happen. They said goodbye and snuck behind the curtain.

But... the exit was actually *behind* where the audience was standing, so they came out from the *side* of the curtain and ran behind us, waving and saying 'bai bai'. They were very cute. For more about them, including some video of their performance at AX, visit their MySpace page.

Last event of the day was the charity auction, where *everything* was up for sale, including the bowler hat that the auctioneer was wearing. It wasn't originally on the block, but after some coercing, the auctioneer decided that the charity was more important than his hat, so he let it go to the tune of $70.

Some of our group were there to be serious bidders, but found that there wasn't much *really good* stuff to be had. Most of the anime items were signed by the English voice actors, and like myself, they probably don't appreciate 'dubs' all that much, especially when the voices sync much better in Japanese, plus a little reading never hurt anyone. I won't get too far into why the English actors are thought of as lesser celebrities, but any true anime enthusiast can tell you why dubs are stupid.

Really, about the only things worth bidding on from a wota standpoint were two cardboard posters: one of Hangry and Angry, which I believe was signed by both members; and one of the full lineup of Morning Musume as they were July 3, 2009, for their first show on mainland USA. I'm told that the MM poster netted a good $2,700. All in all, an obscene amount of money was thrown around for a handful of rare items, and the California Children's Hospital-That-Treats-Cancer-In-Some-Capacity (the one whose video I *so* enjoyed at the opening ceremonies) gained some beaucoup bucks to help more kids. And that's noble.

So what *was* the best part of AX? Was it the camaraderie that was felt instantly by a group of wota from all around the world as we dined that first night at the Suehiro Cafe? Was it when we found the achilles heel of the Big Guy from Vegas who might ordinarily beat us into a pile of mush, were it not for such cute girls as the Morning Musume to sate his desire to kill? Was it when that kindly Japanese family invited us -- nay, inconvenienced themselves to treat us -- to a viewing of an H!P DVD? Or was it many of the other moments that I've mentioned on this blog up to this point?

Well, you really can't have one without the other. *All* of these moments are inexplicably tied together, and not one of us would have flown all the way to L.A. for the promise of just *one* of these events. It was everything we dreamed it might be, and somehow, life-as-usual.

So, instead of a cop-out... what really *was* the best moment of the whole trip? Well, you weren't there; I spent Sunday night by myself after leaving the auction early. I had a few overpriced Fat Tire in the lobby bar of the Westin, until I decided to go back to the rotating restaurant on the top floor to snap some photos that very last night.

The entire trip, whenever I'd ordered a bottle of beer, it came with a glass. But without fail, even if I ordered a 22 oz. bottle of Sapporo, they gave me a juice glass or a little brandy goblet, enough for a few sips, then a refill, and repeat the process a number of times. So when I ordered a small bottle of Chimay in the revolving restaurant (a beer normally served with a small glass like I'd already been given too-many-times), you can imagine my surprise when it came with a fishbowl:

So Monday morning came, I presented Tom with my "aircraft-destroying" geode, and hopped the shuttle to LAX. Really, my worst chance of getting killed was on the L.A. freeway, but I had a couple of flights ahead of me to be worried about. My last memory of L.A. is one of triumph and fear, all rolled into one.

I've seen the Atlantic Ocean from the Florida shore, in 2001. I was disappointed in the fact that I had flown all the way to California but did not get a chance to see the Pacific Ocean in person. And then the plane took off. My window-seat allowed me to watch the ground as it became smaller and smaller, then it turned blue. Even though I was in an airplane, it still counts... there below me was the Pacific Ocean, reknowned for containing a large volume of water, and we flew over it for some time. I actually saw Santa Catalina Island, which was the setting for Catalina Caper, not my favorite but-a-somehow-compelling early episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000.

Now, I'm no expert at navigation but Iowa is *not* across the Pacific Ocean from California, so I just had to trust the Captain to eventually point the plane towards Dallas, Texas -- which is also not across the Pacific Ocean. Good thing I wasn't piloting the plane, because we may have ended up *in* the ocean instead of gaining altitude above it. So, as luck would have it, I made it home in one piece.

And now (unlike many of the people around here, who thought I was crazy to go in the first place), I have friends-for-life who live as far away as the other side of the world.

L.A. Story, Part 5: "May I Ask One More Question?"

2009-08-20T19:56:00.013-05:00

So where was I? I mean, besides Los Angeles, at the Morning Musume show... Oh, that *was* where I left off.

After the show we geared up for the Hello!Party and I was so looking forward to presenting 'Boogie Train '03' in karaoke form. Unfortunately my voice was pretty well shot for the rest of the week from yelling at the Chinese girls, just to piss off CFB. Just kidding, I did a lot of yelling at the show (often at more appropriate times) and I would have ruined that song in my state.

So as luck would have it, I didn't get a chance to do that song, nor the repetitive 'Ramutara' as a duet with Lampshade. Either one would have been fun. But as the evening quickly wore on, I knew that karaoke time was almost over. So the last selection was 'Monkey Dance', a 5-minute romp brought to you by a guy who couldn't sing. Maybe he'd just blown his voice out, too.

Before that, there was a trivia game where the last question went as follows: "On Fujimoto Miki's 'Futarigoto' episode, she drew a picture of a poodle and was quite impressed with her artistic abilities. Draw a poodle the way she did." Correct me if I'm wrong, but this is not a real trivia question. Might make for a fun game of some sort but really, there's no "answer" to this. The closest recreation of that quickly-drawn "dog" won. (For all the outsiders, I'm not going to explain who Miki is, nor lay out the premise of 'Futarigoto', but if you'd seen it, you'd know.)

Another fun game-turned-snafu was the "guess the song" game, where two teams raced each other to identify a song based on its opening strains. The problem with this is that a number of songs take a little while to get started. Such was the case, in particular, for the song "Rainbow Pink", which starts as a fade-in dialogue between Shige & Koha. Only those of us who've heard the song ten million times would be able to identify it from the first few seconds... apparently, many others had, because the correct answer was quickly given. Lots of people claimed to have not heard anything at all, as if it was some act of telepathy on the contestants' part.

I only ended up seeing one round of the 'dangling game', and I think that was the one-and-only round. What made it all the more interesting is that the item being dangled was hard to identify even if you *could* see it: a peeled coconut. As the contestants were not shrieky idols like the Musume can be, they calmly let the stagehands bonk them in the head with a dangling coconut, but were just as confused as we were.

As it turns out, I spent a decent amount of time in the bar upstairs because I have a half-track mind. We talked to a middle-aged guy who looked quite comfortable hanging out at the bar, and he said something like, "yanevrbablt' unerstndnirshmn?" So I stared at Matt until Matt finally told me, 'he says he's from Ireland'. So at least then I knew what I was listening for, and communicating became a little easier. He could understand *me* perfectly, though. But he'd also had a number of drinks called "A.M.F.'s" which stands for "Adios, [two-word expression not repeatable on television]". It's a drink that contains, like, 500% alcohol and comes in electric blue (like Windex). It also tastes like Windex, and I would know, because I drink a glass of Windex every night. (The joke is that I'd never have to clean the glass.) This was the same drink that the Big Guy from Vegas was downing by the gallon a couple of nights before, in a completely different bar. So now I know what the 'in' drink is, or at least how to get plastered in a hurry.

The thing that impressed me most about the Hello!Party was Matt dancing up a storm when the moment called for it. Sorry, you just didn't seem like the type (and even now, you still don't seem like the type) to just get up and dance like a crazy person, albeit very well.

I got outta there before the wotagei segment started. After being bowled over by Matt's dancing, and feeling like a fish out-of-water for all the miscues I had during the actual concert, I *knew* that I'd look like a stick in the mud just sitting there while everyone (with knowledge) would be sweating like crazy.

They would *of course* be presenting Fujimoto's 'Romantic Ukare Mode'. I understand that this song is, like, *the* wota song. But even as I listen to it while I write this, I'm still not sure why this song became the 'wet dream' for all those wota to focus on. Someone want to fill me in?

Well, the next day we headed down to LACC to catch the small (but important) Tsunku Q&A session, transcribed here (thanks for doing this, maiZe!) If there was ever a chance to get the straight dope on H!P, Tsunku was the guy to ask. I thought that most of the questions were really good, and Tsunku gave fairly good answers, very calm and calculated, as one would expect from a guy who's held the entertainment world by its ears for over a decade.

I've got to pull apart a couple of his answers, because I'm reading this transcript and scratching my head in a couple of places. For anyone who wasn't there, this transcript is very accurate. As I read it, I'm reminded of what I was thinking while he gave those answers; again, most of them were very thoughtful and insightful, it's just a couple of things that make me wonder.

First, he said, "...rhythm is something that hasn’t really been valued in Japanese culture and Japanese music and that is something that I stepped into."

Historically, maybe the Japanese as a whole do not value rhythm over other musical qualities. Their folk music certainly depends on other aesthetics. They certainly weren't at the forefront of rock n' roll or hip-hop as each respectively came into the mainstream. But has this guy ever heard of a thing called taiko? I'm fairly sure that there's a strong element of rhythm in that. Plus, in my experience with Jpop, I've never once thought, "these people really need to learn about a thing called 'rhythm'". Even Ms. Kayo Aiko with her two left feet can throw down on some serious groove. SPEED was doing it before that. Pink Lady and the Peanuts had some pretty good rhythm as well. So, I suppose he can say he 'stepped into' something, but a commanding-leadership-of-the-committee-to-reinforce-rhythm-on-behalf-of-a-nation? Admit that you've had some help, Mr. Tsunku, and a great weight will be lifted from your shoulders.

The other thing I had trouble digesting was this fun quote: "When ["How Do You Like Japan?"] started, I could tell that the audience was really excited. I liked how there were some audience members who thought they already figured out what kind of songs Morning Musume was going to be singing and they were about to leave the concert, but when “How Do You Like Japan?” started they turned around and came back."

This is straight out of Tsunku's fantasy world, and it DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE. First, if there actually *were* people leaving during the concert which lasted an hour and a half, I don't want to know who those people are. They certainly weren't sitting in our section. I mean, even when the concert was over, we refused to leave until they threatened to remove us with deadly force. I saw no one leaving in disappointment, and if they did, and if anyone figures out who those people were, I promise them a good severe beating with glowsticks.

Second, if even *one* person showed up to the concert thinking, "I'm going to leave if all they do are the 'hits'", they came for the wrong reason. They could have done "Love Machine" 30 times in a row and even the most casual fan would have stayed. No one went with the sole purpose of criticizing the setlist as the "same ol', same ol'" because whatever song they were singing was effectively the first time they sang the song on American soil. Casual fans would have stuck around to see that.

Last, even the most fickle fairweather fan in attendance for that concert wouldn't have had a thought process like this. "Aw, cripes, 'Love Machine'???? You've got to be kidding me! That's it, I'm leaving; I was expecting to hear songs that I've never heard before... Holy shit, is this 'How Do You Like Japan'? I love this song; I've never heard it before! I think I'll stay!"

Besides Tsunku's version of perhaps a different show than the one we attended, another WTF factor was thrown in by some of the people who were lucky enough to ask a question. I'm speaking, of course, about the people who just couldn't understand that they were one of *many* in attendance, and that the rules didn't seem to apply to them when it came to asking Mr. Tsunku a question.

So, we could have gotten a few more questions in, had most of the questioners saved their gushing for a more appropriate time. Here you are, you get a chance to ask a decent question to a decent guy, and most questions started with something like, "Let me just say what an honor this is, and I'm a huge fan, and you're like a god to me... So, my question is..."

Yeah, yeah, we all respect the guy and think he's just friggin' awesome. I get it. Some of us flew across the country, and around the world, just to see his group and get a chance to ask him a question. So ask him the question and don't waste his, yours, or my time explaining the obvious... was it too much to ask?

Next, some people who even got the chance to ask him a question would hear the answer and then ask, "May I ask one more question?" Uh, that *itself* is a question. You've had two questions, now, so no. NEXT? "Just one more question?" Yet another question, that's three, so again, no. When the translator-lady needs to remind you that you aren't the *only* person in line, you've gone too far. Let others have a chance. Seriously, what's your deal?

Overall, though, the session was very relaxed and very inspiring. But if I could have asked a couple of questions of "the man" himself, I would have asked:

1.) What's your songwriting process? What inspires you to write any given song? On what instrument do you normally compose the chord progressions? Do you record a demo tape or write out the sheet music? At what point do you decide you have a core idea, when do you pass it along to an arranger, and how much of the finished product do you actually create?

2.) How do you prepare yourself for recording sessions for songs where your incidental vocals appear in Morning Musume's songs, et al? Like when C-ute recorded "LA LA LA Shiawase no Uta", did you just *know* that the song wouldn't be complete without you saying "Oh YAY!" over the breakbeats?

...Stuff like that. For me, it's all about the music. If the music was crap, I'd have focused my attention on something else a long time ago. But the winning combination for Morning Musume has been beauty, character, and as well, music with integrity. And the fact that the writing comes mainly from *one* guy... that's a tough act to follow.

After that, I spent a mostly free Saturday on my own in L.A., but I headed down to the Convention Center after returning to the hotel and finding Tom's key-card on the desk. I thought he'd want it back... plus, I hadn't yet bought any CD's from the H!P booth, and thought I'd kill two birds with one stone.

Never did find Tom, but when I approached the H!P booth, the gentleman working there asked me, "can I help you?" My response was, "yes, I'd like *one* of these, *two* of these, and *one* of these, please..." Well I never saw a person go from zero to sixty so fast in my life. I know that they'd been slugging it out for two-and-a-half days, and when it rained, it poured. At that point, they'd sold the lion's share, and very few people were approaching the booth with any intention to buy by the time Saturday rolled around. So my willingness to buy, coupled with not-another-person-asking, 'where can I get an autograph?' really turned this guy back into a salesman.

As far as autographs went, Saturday was apparently the day to do it, as all the people who were promised them but hadn't yet got them were to be fulfilled that day. I spent a bit of time with some familiar faces as they waited for the queue to form. Unfortunately, like most other AX events, they hadn't decided the proper way to do this until it was actually happening. So they were *actively* shooing people away from the queueing area to cover up for their own lack-of-planning, and might I say it was straight-up annoying... and I wasn't even there to get an autograph, just to hang out with the people who *were*.

So the autograph-seekers spent time at nearby booths, feigning interest in their wares, waiting for some official signal for the line to form. If the powers-that-be would have just started a line, all the autograph-seekers would have queued respectfully and not caused a problem. Instead, AX saw to it that anyone who was trying to queue up peaceably became a troublemaker, a sort-of "stay off-a my grass" mentality that didn't sit well with this otherwise-introspective group.

I took my CD purchases back to the hotel with me and stopped off at California Pizza Kitchen on the way. I sat at the bar and enjoyed a Southwest Chicken Pizza, which came with a bullet of each: salsa, guac, and sour cream. Knowing that I didn't want to keep just *one* piece in the hotel fridge, (I can't believe) I ate the whole thing. The bartender there was a kindly Asian man who dealt with a couple of customers, who (keeping in mind it was, like, 2PM on a Saturday) ran down the list of alcoholic beverages, only to find that they had an extremely limited bar. One of them asked the bartender how to get a job as an L.A. bartender, and I presume that the fellow was working on a script.

The television there was tuned to some football-like tourrnament; and the Asian bartender, as well as the Hispanic chef, collectively asked me what sport was being played. I told them that it was either rugby, or Australian football, but I wasn't sure which. Turns out it was rugby, but I felt like the most-knowledgable person on the planet for a minute-or-so.

Back to the autographs, then. By that point I hadn't seen an autograph ticket, nor dedicated myself to spending umpteen hours waiting for one. Forgive my holier-than-thou attitude on this point, but I've just got to clarify...

I did not fly from Iowa to California just to get an autograph. My whole purpose was to see the show and support the group. And I'd done so by that point. My take on celebrity seems quite different from a lot of people. It's all well and good to show up to a venue, get one's kicks by seeing one's favorite celebrity in the flesh, and take some pleasure from it. I also understand -- I'm not being disparaging to those who *did* get autographs -- the desire to get an autograph. But I just didn't feel it was my place to force the girls to give me a tangible piece of themselves.

I'm told that the autograph session was performed very hurriedly, and although it was a chance to see them up-close and get a brief moment alone with each of them, I'm glad I stayed away from the occasion. I returned home with a renewed sense of respect for the girls as performers, and I'm not sure I'd have taken away the same impression had I been one-of-many who was forcing them to sign-sign-sign, and be done with it. I kept my distance, and (in my opinion) did not cheapen the long-distance bond that we've had for some time. You may see it differently. Hey, that's cool...

Last, a few unrelated pictures... first, a view of downtown from the venue:

The "I Don't Know Why I Shot This" view of West L.A. from the hotel hallway (dig the backed-up freeway)...

And lastly, the "Holy Crap, I can see the HOLLYWOOD sign from here" shot, with Griffith Observatory being the next-most-prominent landmark from the far-left...

L.A. Story, Part 4: "The Concert"

2009-08-11T20:43:00.003-05:00

I had made a reservation at Takami Sushi the night before the concert. It's a swank little place on the 21st floor (there's even a patio area) in the middle of downtown. Since I had made the reservation before the trip started, it was only for Tom and me. But we brought along our new friends Lamp and Matt, and Takami had no trouble accomodating. It was a good place, although to be honest I've had sushi that was just as good here in Iowa; since the prices are similar, I enjoyed it. We were the only ones there who weren't wearing collared shirts... but the restaurant itself told me via email (it took them only 8 minutes to reply to my question) that jeans and sneakers were acceptable attire.

The other side of the 21st floor is an even-more-classy nightclub called Elevate, and it actually advertises itself as a filming location, if you have any movies that need to be shot there. Among other music videos filmed there, Britney Spears' "Womanizer" chose it as a location... I know, that's your favorite song, how cool is that? Upscale attire is mandatory for that side of the building, but anyone who doesn't consider a Tanaka Reina t-shirt to be formal wear is waay too uptight for my tastes.

Afterwards, Matt and Lamp dragged me to the AX After Dark dance in the Westin. We were ID'd 3 times within a few steps, then given a wristband to show that we were over 21. Hold on to that thought. We were told that if we took off our shoes, we'd be booted from the party. Okay. Every wild party I've ever been to starts when someone says, "I'm taking off my shoes!" I paid 80 bucks for my new Nike's just a week before I left, so they were staying on my feet.

Why the wristband, I don't know. They weren't serving alcohol (although maybe the pretzels were laced or something), and on top of that the whole venue smelled like a big armpit. So we made one pass through the place, found only a few people lounging about, and headed directly for the Bonaventure Brewing Company. I mean, we'd just spent our day in the presence of Morning-friggin'-Musume, and we had to celebrate.

We had ourselves many a drink that evening before we joined forces with another Musume fangroup. The leader of that group was a big bald guy with a moustache, and if his name isn't Vinny, he should change it to that, 'cause I can totally see it.

In contrast to our group's collective misfortune of being shut out from the autograph session, this dude was *there*. So he was excited, and at that point had a lot to drink. So he was practically (by which I mean he pretty much was) yelling about his love of the group, in an hilarious monologue that could not be aired on television. We just doubled over in laughter, he was so excited. I felt a little embarrassed about his choice of language but believe me, I couldn't have done anything about it. And we all just enjoyed the moment. I repeatedly told him, "that's so cool, I'm happy for ya." Well anyway, we shut down the bar with those guys and we knew that if anyone wanted to give us any trouble, we'd just send in the big drunk guy.

With our evening capped off from all that weight-training and zen meditation (by way of listening to the big guy tell us all the explicit things he would do to our beloved Musume), we were in perfect shape for the concert the next day.

The queue formed at 12:30, and the concert began at 2:30. We'd gotten there early and hung outside the venue listening to Morning Musume do a soundcheck. If you could jump high enough, you could see the VTR screens, and in addition, the speakers were loud enough to confirm that they were in there practicing away. Moze and I grabbed a quick $85 lunch at the AX cafeteria and got in line. Since our seats were already confirmed on the ticket, there was really no reason to show up at 12:30, but what else did we have to do?

AX decided that the best place to queue was in the sun outside the venue. They went around with bullhorns and threatened to kick us out of the concert if we tried to take pictures. Okay, we got it. Nope, tell us again...

Not much happened in line, although we talked to a guy from, what-was-it, North Carolina(?) who was in his late 50's and like us, had come all the way to AX to see the Musume concert. When we finally got to our seats, we met up again with Mage, who told us about C-Zone, another Jpop girl group who'd be doing a couple of smaller shows in the merchant hall on Sunday.

A guy just a couple of seats over noticed that Moze and I didn't have glowsticks so he offered one to each of us. Giving me what was presumed to be a pink glowstick, he asked, 'do you like Sayu?' I replied that I did, in fact, think myself a fan of Sayu and graciously accepted the gift. It turned out to be orange, which I'm told is Kamei Eri's color, but that's not the point. I had a glowstick and whoever's color I happened to get was the one I would claim. I had made a declaration on this site some months ago that I was planning to kidnap Eri if I ever saw her in person, and although she's safe for now, there's always next time.

They blared AC/DC music from one of their newer albums for most of the pre-show time. Huh. Eventually they started playing those terrible AX promo videos on the VTR, and one of those was the 'Tour of Little Tokyo' video, where they hung out by the 'red thing' like we did, and the music was '3, 2, 1, Breaking Out!' so whenever it started all the fans would mime along with glowsticks, until the music stopped abruptly and everyone went, 'Awwww...' until the video was over. This happened several times.

As for the show, well, it was all new to me, but not to the seasoned Japanese veterans in front of us who had two glowsticks of every color in the waiting. I've seen a few concert DVD's in my life and I knew what was to come. The group took the stage, everyone stood up, and the short girl behind me got upset about it. Okay, fine; for your sake, we will all sit quietly and watch the Musume perform. Not a chance. To that girl, I'm sorry a thousand times if you couldn't see over me, but clearly AX does not care about you, and it was not in the plans when they decided to hold such an event with a flat viewing area. I'd have sat down if it meant you could have seen the stage better, but the reality was that neither of us would have been able to see the show at that point.

Hopefully I have a few fresh things to say about the concert which everyone's already been talking about, because my knowledge of performance (from both an audience and a performer's perspective) is one of my strong points. You all may watch Haromoni like it's going out of style, but I know what a good concert should be.

From my perspective, it was great. I was in the seventh row, center, and I could see everything and hear everything. Anywhere else in the hall, further back or more to the side, I don't know. I don't think the hall was ideal, just a square room with a concrete floor and some 8,000 yay-hoo's (myself included) going nuts as the show went on as planned. I don't know what the view was from the back of the hall, and frankly, I don't care, because I had a great seat.

The girls sang and danced wonderfully. It was guaranteed to be epic just based on circumstance. But overall, it seemed kinda shoddy. The sound system was pushed beyond a comfortable limit, even sounding 'broken' in certain parts of the show. The girls deserve some sort of medal for being able to put on a decent performance with all that sound just beating 'em in the head. Sayu was particularly off-key in a few places, but again, with the sound system, it's hard to blame her, and if you were there to hear recorded-quality music, ya should have stayed home and listened to the CD. I, on the other hand, pretty much stared a hole through Koharu, but I managed to get a glimpse of all the other girls; enough time that I could pick them out in a police lineup after they mugged me on the street.

Next issue was the space for the audience. At one point (I think it was) Reina advised us, 'everybody JUMP!' and my reply was, 'this is not advisable, Reina!' as we would either rack ourselves on the chair-back in front of us, or the chair-seat behind us. My legs touched the chair behind me the whole time, and likewise, my waist touched the chair in front of me. I could not jump, although I wanted to.

Then there was the strange choice of the setlist. The girls came out and performed all their songs but one, and then Tsunku came out to announce the winners of the AMV (amateur music video) contest. We heard '3, 2, 1, Breaking Out! (Short Version)' three times while the winnning videos were played, and the girls danced to themselves every time the song played. Yossie, under the alias 'HANGRY' (which fooled no one) came out to explain that Rika (a.k.a. ANGRY) could not make it to Los Angeles because she was 'angry'. Lame, lame, lame joke. No one really needed an explanation for her absence, but having offered that, clearly they could have come up with a better excuse.

The audience's energy was sapped by the end of the presentation, and the girls wrapped up the show by doing '3, 2, 1, Breaking Out!' for a second time. It was a blink-or-you'll-miss-it kind of thing. By the time our energy had picked up again, the song was nearly over. They said their goodbyes and left the stage. 8,000 people chanted "EN-CO-RU!" for what I'm told was 12 full minutes but no encore was given. Instead, several of the AX crowd-controllers came out looking frustrated and waved their arms like a football referee does when a field goal kick is called 'not good'. Someone got on the microphone and said, 'the show has ended, please exit to your right' and AX staffers along the way ordered us to keep moving, like it was some sort of weird death march. I am a fast walker, and I was going as fast as the crowd would allow me, and they kept yelling at us to keep moving. We were moving, dammit.

It was clear -- and I love you guys and thank you all for the hard work putting the show together and all the time you spent that week -- but it was *clear* that no one on staff knew who they were dealing with. No one even bothered to come up with a hypothetical for the outcome of the show. A sane group would have thought, "you know, this group is known for having some real fanatics; what do we do if they refuse to leave the venue?" Did they think that we would file out quietly and just accept that the show was over? The decision which the AX staff decided to go with is this: act confused, tell everyone to leave immediately, and be staunch about it. Tell everyone to keep moving.

Mr. Tsunku, was an appropriate encore for your first actual American show just a repeat of *one* song? Did you hear the frenzy that was 8,000 people calling for an encore? Just wondering.

Oh well, I've seen Morning Musume in concert. And not just any concert, but the first (and until they get so popular over here that we can't get rid of them, the *only*) concert on the US mainland. I was sweating like crazy while it was going on, I've never pumped my arm so many times in my life. I lost my voice for about a week yelling along with the songs and as well, in responding to the MC parts, where they asked us questions like, 'Minna-san genki desu ka?' (Reina got that honor) As I and others have mentioned, the appropriate American response to that question is "I'M FUCKIN' GENKI!'

They did the song I had expected them to do, "Ame no Furanai, etc...." with the Chinese solo lines, and when those occured, even in the seventh row, you could not hear them singing. I know at least one other fellow blogger was perturbed by that; I decided the opposite, and every time I hear that song, I'm reminded of how much support we gave to JunJun and LinLin. Sure, I may crack a few jokes about how I won't accept Chinese Musume, I mean, I really think it goes against the whole point of the group, but whatever... the American crowd clearly has their backs. And all that disrupting of the song was intended to be support on their behalf. Yeah, we ruined the best part of the song, but it's seriously one of the best moments in audio-recording history, and we just had to say something to show our love.

In conclusion, I don't think I can ever go to an American concert again that doesn't include choreographed yelling, glowstick waving, and fist pumping. Aside from seeing Slayer in a tiny little Iowa venue, for me it was Best. Concert. Ever. Minus the glowstick waving, the Slayer show was pretty similar, although I was further back in the crowd for that.

Well then, next episode (maybe there'll be pretty pictures for that)... Part 5, including Hello!Party and the Tsunku Q & A session, et al. Bai bai!

L.A. Story, Part 3: "A Long Day 1 Goes by Quickly"

2009-08-10T22:09:00.000-05:00

Having scored a seventh-row ticket to the concert (my main reason for going to Los Angeles in the first place), my mind was at ease for the time being. Since Tom got separated from us during the registration process, I had a little alone time at the Bonaventure Brewing Company. The bartender there seemed to know an awful lot about movies, had his opinions on them, and apparently was bartending until his big break as an actor. For a moment I had forgotten about the long history of filmmaking in Los Angeles, and once I realized where I was (all over again), it seemed like this gentleman was one of many, many hopeful souls slugging it out in LA, day after day, hoping for a break. Not that he wasn't a nice guy and a damned decent bartender, but keep on dreaming, dude, and maybe someday you'll catch that break. He was also working on a script... lots of Angelenos are doing that as well.

Earlier in the evening, I had been pulled aside by an attractive but older-than-me Australian woman who asked why so many geeks were around. I told her about the Expo and my goal to see the concert, and she gave me a quick run-down of the city's history over the last six years that she had been travelling there ("you couldn't walk around downtown back then, it was so bad"). She mentioned that she was spending her last night in LA and would be moving on, but that she loved LA and wished she could stay. Now, maybe she was trying to tell me something... but either way I missed my chance.

I hung out at the bar for quite a while (that's what I'm good at), and eventually another Australian woman showed up, and I had thought it was the same gal as before. Thinking I might not have actually missed my chance, I asked her if she was the girl who asked me about the Expo just a little while ago. She mistook it for a clever line, even though at that point I was thoroughly confused (*two* Australian women in one night? Impossible!) and was just glad to have some conversation, and well, maybe she'd give me the key to her room. Didn't happen, in any case, but I let the alcohol fool me into thinking I was charming, and I ended up taking last call and going back to the room to sleep.

Morning arrived, and Tom and I headed down to the LACC to check out the opening ceremonies. The ceremony itself was not very eventful, but just beforehand, while the lights were low, out of the stage curtains came nine well-dressed Asian girls. Since the rest of the AX-goers were either dressed-down or in costume, my brain put the puzzle together and it was at this point that I first saw the current incarnation of Morning Musume in the flesh. As they sat down in the front row I stayed on my feet and stared a hole right through them. Tom and I were a little off to the side, but we were mere *feet* away from the group as they just sort of hung out, waiting for the show to start. I remember waving as Takahashi turned her head my way, and if I'm not mistaken she waved back. She could have been waving at anyone in my general direction, it didn't matter. What I saw was that mix of confidence and self-awareness that makes Takahashi who she is. Sort of a "hi, I don't know you, but yep, it's me, back at ya..."

The opening ceremonies, for me, were gruelling. The girls sat in the audience for the majority of it, waiting their turn as the less-otherworldly guests were introduced. There was a segment where the hostess explained that the charity auction proceeds would go to a California childrens' hospital, so they showed a video clip of themselves, many cancer-ridden children told their stories on the video, and it made me feel bad for being healthy. I don't enjoy seeing children suffer, I'm glad that the hospital was doing its work, and if they'd just ask I'd give 'em some money. But as the video went on I was saying to Tom, "The girls are up there crying right now, you know this..." Finally the girls were introduced to a not-very-excited crowd, I don't know whether it was because all the energy had been drained by the time they were introduced, or whether the crowd was really more about the anime people. I cheered anyway, and in a few minutes the ceremony was over. We would catch up with them later.

I said hi to Moze for a brief minute, and he informed me that the AX Idol audition signup was happening about, oh, ten minutes ago. So we parted ways and I went straight to the audition hall to get signed in.

If there was ever a reason for separating my huge story into parts, it was the AX Idol audition. As far as I know, none of the people I hung out with were there for any of it, so amongst our group of friends, this is the story they don't know, until now.

You'd think that people who audition for an "Idol" contest would be able to form a sentence and communicate reasonably well, but I asked a few people, "is the the registration line for 'Idol'?" And unlike most people in California, these people were not social *at all*. It was just a couple of random guys in line, but still, SAY SOMETHING, I asked you a damn question! Oh, okay, let's just keep to ourselves at the friggin' anime convention with 50,000 attendees...

I managed to get in the correct line and got my name checked off, and my number was 57 (of 70-some contestants). I had envisioned that the audition might be private, just go into the room when your time comes, and find out later who won. Nope, like everything else at AX, it was a test of endurance. I got in the room at 10AM and spent the next four hours listening to every last contestant, put in my minute, and in the end it seemed like I didn't get a damn thing out of it. But there were some upsides to this arrangement.

Before the show started, the guy I sat next to pulled out a custom-built RC car and drove it around the stage area, to the host's amusement. "Oh no, it's got a mind of its own" and the like was heard several times over the next 20 minutes. Funny for the first ten, but not-so-funny for the next. Finally the contest began and he put the car away. So as not to spend more than a minute without being somewhat annoying, he pulled his phone out of his shorts pocket every thirty seconds for the next couple of hours. This gave him a chance to both elbow me and wave some armpit air at me at the same time. Many times. Eventually I moved a few seats down when the crowd thinned.

The hosts never once had a a bad word about the contestants, even when they completely deserved it. They never said, 'what the hell was that?' or 'you're terrible', so where's Simon Cowell when you need him? After a few people auditioned, it was clear that I probably wasn't going to make the cut, but that they also couldn't tell me anything *too* bad about my performance.

I waited and waited, until finally my chance came. Someone complimented my Perfume shirt, which was made my a guy from Los Angeles (and you can find other designs by the same artist at www.thatskeen.com). I gave a shout out to Iowa, and people responded well to that, I'm not sure if they were being nice or if there were a couple others in the audience. Then I mentioned that the song was by Aiko and it was used for the Emil Chronicle Online game. Hence, I sang 'Hold on to love' as planned, and the segment I chose was 1:10, the rules called for 1:00 exactly, but they gave a little leeway, and I got cut off just before the end of my last phrase, so I sang it anyway. The reason I probably shouldn't have used that song was that it was too low to show off any of my high-range and put some real power into my voice, but I sang it well. Not my best but certainly a good representation of how I sing that song. There was a TV station covering the event by this point, so I may have made it on TV, but don't have the slightest what channel or time it would have been. Slow news day, I guess.

The judges mentioned that they liked my full baritone voice and that I had represented Iowa very well. I thanked them but knew I was outclassed. In the end, as someone there had said, "they only pick the loud ones". Although I have to give credit to all five finalists who certainly did better than me, there were a few others who I felt hadn't been recognized when they should have been. Like the girl who sang a beautiful aria-like solo completely in Russian (It was perfect. I teared up, it was so good.) Or the guy who was dressed fully in drag, and sounded a bit too much like Gackt. The voice was fantastic, but it was the combination of the outfit and that huge husky voice that had everyone laughing, but in a good "oh my God, this is great" kinda way.

What struck me as I lived the AX Idol event was that, okay, I've been listening to Japanese music for over three years. It sounds normal to me now, but of course hardly any one else around here knows about it or cares. And there I was, in a room with perhaps a couple hundred people, watching people sing mostly in Japanese, and it just felt like "this is normal... we sing in Japanese all the time." It was great. My "strange" habit of singing in Japanese didn't seem quirky or out of place. I felt as if, for once, I was normal.

One girl who auditioned was dressed like the Blue Chick from Shugo Chara (with the sock garters and everything... nosebleed!). And I really wanted to get her picture, along with her friend who was dressed like a member of High-King. But as the ceremony wound down there was no time to talk amongst ourselves without being rude, and when the competition finally ended they ran out of the room. So I didn't get their picture. I knew where they were going, though; it was where all the H!P fans were at that exact moment, the Morning Musume Q & A session.

It had already started by the time I arrived, so I didn't get very good seats, although I got to stand in the back, which wasn't extremely far away, and I had an unobstructed view. I managed to snap a couple of quick pics of the *real* H!P members before I was confronted by a staffer. Like I told him, the sign said "no flash photography or video", and my flash was off. Another sign said, "no photography" so I don't know why the other one made that distinction. But I apologized and told him, I didn't really get a good picture anyway. The response (via body language) was, "I don't care, I'm too busy being a dick". Laugh or something, it's okay... I cooperated and didn't get all indignant, so lighten up.

What I did manage to get is a blur shaped just like each of your favorite members...

Which is a little better than I did at the opening ceremonies, where they were seated in rows...

Well, the Q & A has been covered and translated by many others, so I'll leave you to find that (ahem). And as I watched the Q & A, a few things went through my mind about the group and Jpop in general. I'll get to the others in subsequent posts, but for now I'll just say I realized how much of a casual fan I am. When it comes time for a question like, "Could you do the Atto pose for us?" I admit that I have *no idea* what the hell that is. Why did I not spend every waking hour prior to this event watching Haromoni so I could get *every* in-joke? Oh, that's right, I'm an Aiko fan. Admittedly, you couldn't call someone who flew 2,000 miles to see a group a "casual fan" but a lot of the audience went a lot more ga-ga over them than I did. I just thought it was cool to see them in person.

Anyway, put me on the list of people who says that they were very charming and that a good time was had by all. But towards the end of the session, I realized that: 1.) I didn't want to spend a half-hour getting out of there to wait for an autograph ticket, 2.) I didn't want to spend another god-knows-how-long waiting in queue for an autograph immediately after that, and 3.) between the opening ceremonies and AX Idol, I'd had no time to purchase anything for them to sign. So I left just before the conclusion and eventually found where the signing would be held. And I went to go find the other guys on their way out of the session.

Woo, frustration occurs here. I stood safely beyond the checkpoint and asked a staffer where the fans might exit after getting an autograph. Here's a paraphrase...

"Well, you need a ticket; or you could get in the standby line if they have time left..."

No, *where* will the fans be exiting when they are done?

"Do you have a ticket?"

Um, I don't want an autograph, I want to find my friends when it's over. This is a question about the building... where is the exit from the signing?

"I don't know."

You don't know where the exit is on this end of the building?

"You need a ticket for an autograph."

And on and on until a sane staffer came and told me where I'd find the people after they got autographs. That was hard.

Never did see any fellow H!P fans until later on when they got back to the hotel, where I was taking in a marathon of "Lockdown" on MSNBC, a reality show about prisons, which was info-taining. What I found out was that only a few people had gotten autographs, and they had mostly wasted their time and gotten very confused. I didn't feel so bad about having skipped out earlier. Oh well, it was off to the bar, and we had a time. I'll give the 'family-friendly' version of that story in my next installment. Oh yeah, and the concert will be included in that post as well. So until then...

Oh, and One More Thing

2009-08-09T14:54:00.003-05:00

...before I get back to business. I just spotted this "new" SPEED album and apparently they are agressively besmirching their own past with this one. No new songs, just re-workings of all the old songs that got me into them in the first place. Put me down for 'negative one' copies of this, please. Better yet, I should buy one just to make a video of its destruction at my hands. Seriously, what the fuck is going on?

NOOOOOOO! Just, NOOOOOOO!

I thought I made my point clear enough the last time they did this:

"...my main opposition to this recording is that, look, Hiro and Eriko are ten years older now, and they're not screaming at the top of their lungs like they used to. Which happens to be their old trademark, and what endeared me to those old songs in the first place. Anybody who tries to build a time machine and go back to give them some control or nuance that they didn't have then should be killed before a good thing gets ruined." [Too late...] [Emphasis added -Ed.]

"Ladies, you're all beautiful and talented, but if this isn't you anymore, don't pretend. ...you already recorded it years ago, and we still have it on CD. And for every imitation you do of your thirteen-year-old selves, I wonder whether it's because you think you can do it better now, or because you think it'll be just as good as it was before (or the third, most likely answer: because the producers demanded it). Seriously, I can put the old (real) 'STEADY' on repeat for weeks at a time if I miss it that much.

I don't mind the new 'heavier' backing tracks ...and someday we may get to hear the new music with the old voices. But time has moved on, and ...no matter how hard you try (with every available technology), you just can't recapture a moment."

Intermission

2009-08-08T20:29:00.004-05:00

Sumimasen, y'all, for how much time it's taking to get part three up. Day One was a long day, and I don't think anyone I knew was there to see me audition for AX Idol, so I'm trying to communicate all that 'flava'. Meanwhile, International Wota is listing all the people who copied my idea (j/k) and of course I'm nowhere to be found. Oh well, they're just covering all the filler until my seventh installment, Anime Expo and the Deathly Hallows.

Until then (and it shouldn't be long, it's mostly done), enjoy this video. It's called 'Whatever-the-Hell-This-Is' by Some Japanese Chicks (featuring Saito Michi). It's the most absurd (with the strange familiarity of Jpop) video that I've seen in quite a while. First, Mi-chan is the one who pulls the sword from the scabbard towards the beginning of the video and gets the cool light-reflection-effect on her eye. Next, Mi-chan is not the black guy with the cigar. Third, I soooo want to buy a ragtop Cadillac and just blast the *crap* out of this song, rolling down the strip in Vegas at about 5 miles an hour. I've got to figure out what this is, because as long as it's possible to play this video, I can never sleep again.

Also, what a perfect screencap. If you've seen such a picture and aren't even *tempted* to watch, then it's time to turn in your Japanophile badge...

L.A. Story, Part 2: "Day -1, Day 0, and the Wonderful Registration Process"

2009-08-01T21:26:00.011-05:00

So I had finally met Tom in person (as opposed to on MSN, where his picture looks *nothing* like him -- turns out it's Nakki, now ya tell me...). So we spent maybe two minutes talking about our respective journeys to California; and, no time wasted, he told me that plans were already underway to hit the Little Tokyo district. I had to check my schedule to see if I had any conflicts... nope, my whole week was free, so I said, 'let's go,' and so we did.

We found a couple of fellow wota just two short downtown blocks away. We hopped on a bus, and we all sat in the back like the weirdos that we are. There was *one* lady on the bus when we got on; a few stops later it was standing-room-only, including a female police officer (you certainly won't catch any cops riding the bus around here). Most people rode for only a couple of blocks -- after all, it only costs a quarter -- and by the time we reached Little Tokyo we were pretty much the only ones on the bus again. Me, Tom, and four others got out when we saw Japanese writing on storefronts, and we were quite hungry. But we hadn't yet met up with the rest of the group. After everyone showed up we could have filled a clown car.

First we had to find Matt_D and Lampshade, and as we were trying to figure out the most obvious landmark in the area ("we're by the RED thing!") I had decided that we were on First Street. Looking at a street sign would have changed my mind, but First was a pretty good choice, if you ask me. Actually, we were on Second, so *our* group walked up and down Second while Matt and Lamp patrolled along First, and we weren't where we said we'd be, but we *were* by the red thing.

Finally the matter got sorted out, I admitted that I was wrong, and we got the privilege of meeting two more wota (the Berryz Kobo shirt which Matt was wearing was a dead giveaway). But we still couldn't eat, there were *more* people to find. Then Moze arrived, and I don't think there was any confusion for that rendezvous (correct me if I'm wrong), so we finally got a chance to sit down somewhere and get some chow.

We ultimately decided that the Suehiro Cafe looked like a good place, and we were greeted with 'irrashaimase!' when we entered. We put about five tables together so we all had a setting, and we gathered round to tell H!P war stories. This was the first time in my life I'd been able to mention an H!P girl -- for instance, Matsuura Aya -- without prefacing the story with "she's a Japanese idol singer..." so we all got along quite well.

Now, appropriately enough, the restaurant serves Sapporo, so those of us who could ordered ourselves a bottle. But as much as I like H!P and a lot of other Japanese things (Aiko is a good example); okay, I'll drink Sapporo, but the English guys really think the world of it. I just don't see it. Sorry, but I won't bring myself to believe that the Japanese have a superior product in this case. In this writer's opinion, anything German or perhaps a good Czechoslovakian lager will always win if Sapporo is the competitor.

So, they tell me that Dave Foley (of Kids in the Hall and NewsRadio fame) was in the Suehiro Cafe while we dined. I didn't think I saw anyone remarkable, but I'm glad I hadn't recognized him. I might have got all starstruck and harrassed the guy instead of letting him eat a meal in peace like a normal human being.

Anyway, the waitress was practically an idol herself, being fluent in Japanese and also being very pretty. We had her take a couple of pictures of the group just before we left, and Tom has posted one, which I've stolen to present below (I'm the cute one). The other is out there somewhere. The camera is turned the wrong way -- the photgrapher is picturesque.

We stood around in Little Tokyo for a while; Matt_D rightfully accused me of turning this site into an Urbangarde fansite, and I was sort of defensive until he agreed that their record was "awesome". I described it to the group as "Perfume-meets-Cannibal Corpse"; and it was some time later (probably even after I got back to Iowa) that I realized it was Matt's own influence that had led me to purchase the Urbangarde record in the first place, and I quote: "So it's now my goal to see these guys live..." Sorry I hadn't made the connection and thought you were a hater for a minute. I just thought you'd be taller, is all... (love this post, btw...)

Then we decided to head back downtown, went to the revolving restaurant atop the Westin, and we all had too much to drink (or so it felt, revolving room and all). On the way back to the hotel I snapped a shot of the LA Times building (it just seemed like an interesting subject).

The next morning Tom and I took our sweet, hungover time and headed down to the Convention Center for the first of many visits. Pre-registration started at 3PM, and it was only around 9:30 by the time we arrived. Some of the guys had said the night before that 5AM(!) was a good time to show up, but gimme a break, I was on vacation... Here is a shot of the pandemonium which wasn't happening on Day 0, a couple of blocks away from the point of registration...

We found our way to the *actual* registration point and just sort of butted in line where Moze had been standing for a while, and if you think that's sort of rude, we only cut in front of a few people, all said, and the number of people that ended up cutting in front of us was horrific. Luckily, most of the registrants were there for socializing instead of Morning Musume tickets, so we graciously let them in line ahead of us. One guy knew everybody (more on him later).

Time-passers in line included waiting for Tom and Moze to bring me a sammich for lunch, staring at a very pretty Asian girl (who seemingly had no friends, and I don't believe it for a second), and watching the guy in front of me (the "kid who knows everybody") explain his rather mundane artwork in fits of swear words and hyperbole.

When we got there, lines A & B had mostly filled up, a few people were at the front of line C, and as the day went on, lines D - F filled completely and they eventually had to queue the remaining arrivals outside. Those of us who had been crazy enough to wait around for hours got to stay out of the sun, and if we left the building, they marked our hands with a very-hard-to-reproduce Sharpie 'X' that meant we were grandfathered-in for waiting inside.

If you didn't have an 'X' on your hand, all you had to do was complain loudly that you'd been waiting inside earlier in the day, and they'd let you in. I saw it happen a few times.

As registration time got closer, an Asian family (I assume they were Japanese, at least the little girl was speaking Japanese -- 'sugoi' is a Japanese word, right?) was watching a recent Morning Musume concert on a portable DVD player. When Moze and I began singing along, they were gracious enough to let us sit in their circle and we mimed a number of wota moves along to the show with the family. We all sang together in Japanese; I never thought I'd be hanging out with a Japanese family watching an H!P DVD in high spirits like we all were that day, but it happened, and it was very cool.

Sometime during the day we had gotten word from others about Morning Musume's arrival at LAX, and there was video of the American fans screaming and waving at them up on youTube before we even got registered. Some people had already seen the footage and described it as 'epic', and although I hadn't seen the video until just a couple of days ago, they were right. We all had a slight fit of jealousy for being stuck in the registration line whilst some of our friends had the good fortune of seeing the group in person.

That feeling wore off eventually, and general excitement for the days to come returned when the registration finally began. So when the line started to move and the kid in front of us, who knew everybody *and* had a cartload of luggage, moved, he didn't take the luggage with him. Instead, he took more than a few moments to regroup, grabbed each piece of luggage, and eventually brought it forward. The line moved again, he advanced, but again left the luggage. Moze and I decided that we were going to keep the line moving and that it was more than appropriate to step over his luggage.

But sure enough, the Japanese family behind us dutifully took it upon themselves to help the stubborn kid with his luggage; those damned Japanese and their stupid helpfulness! Moze admitted that he felt bad about stepping over it at this point and decided to help move the cartload forward. He asked the kid, 'what all did you bring?' and without missing a beat, the kid said, 'well, these are my skates, and this is my artwork, and these are my clothes, and this is my...' And he was clearly unaware that Moze was razzing him a bit for, well, moving to the Anime Expo.

I myself have no patience for this kind of thing. When a line that's been waiting six-plus hours starts to move, have a bit of consideration for your fellow queuers and get your ass a-going. He was lucky that I didn't pick all his stuff up and throw it to the far corners of the hall; although if I'd done so, I'd have expected a full-scale retaliation from an army of nerds.

Regardless, the line was finally moving, and although there was a station for each line, A - F, the organizers decided to let lines A & B begin registration whilst making the other lines wait until A & B had gone. The only problem was that line C had a number of people who were there well before we arrived, and they shouted at the crowd controllers about this for a time, to no avail. So a number of people who should have rightfully registered before us got shafted out of a position in the concert ticket line, which queued up immediately following the badge signup. It was a mess.

Despite a small computer glitch, we got signed in without too much trouble (I watched the video on how to register before I left for my trip, so it was easy). After that, it was another hour's wait until the concert tickets would be distributed. We headed straight to that line, and were about 30 or 40 people behind the leader, with Matt_D and Lampshade somehow within the top ten.

We were all a bit restless from the long day, plus it was fairly obvious that the people in the ticket line were there to score tickets to the Morning Musume concert, so we had something to talk about with everyone -- who we are, where we're from, where we'd first heard of Morning Musume and AX, etc. And it was in this line that we met Mage (his real name, not a handle, if you can believe it), from New Orleans, who had plenty of insight into Jpop, language, and music in general.

We finally got our concert tickets after the entire line had been moved from one side of the patio to the other, for two reasons: 1.) where we were queued was a fire hazard, and 2.) the AX staff had not thought to supervise the self-created queue -- good call, guys! -- because they were all apparently too busy arguing with the registrants in line C ("I don't care if you got here earlier than them, I'm only following orders!")

Moze and I had a celebratory dinner at the downtown Los Angeles IHOP (motto: We'll give you the keycode to restroom if you buy something!") and the restaurant quickly became a favorite for Mr. Moze, some several other times he went there during the week. I myself only enjoyed it that one time, but it was good, and in traditional IHOP style, very inexpensive.

L.A. Story, Part 1: "Getting There"

2009-07-30T21:46:00.010-05:00

I still have trouble believing that I was there. Not just the historic Morning Musume concert, but Los Angeles in general. It was even bigger than I expected it to be, and I expected it to be HUGE. One thing's for sure, H!P picked a helluva place to send a notorious homebody like myself on a weeklong soul-searching excursion.

I was kinda disappointed that I wasn't able to attend Sakura-Con and meet Hangry&Angry in Seattle. I had a lot going on back then and also figured that Seattle was quite a ways away. But in my several years of watching Morning Musume in videos and TV appearances (especially Utaban), I made a vow that if they ever came to the U.S., wherever it was, I would go.

So in a conversation with Tom on MSN right before Good Friday service I said, not thinking too seriously about it, "I'm going to look into the LA gig, what's it called?" Next morning I had bought a plane ticket, registered for Anime Expo, and put in for a hotel reservation. Once I saw plane tickets for $300 it took about 20 minutes and I was officially bound for the Expo.

I made a list the weekend prior, of all the things I wanted to get done before I left for the Expo. Some of them were necessities for the trip, others were intended to ease my return, like cleaning my house so I didn't return to a complete junkpit. And some of my chores bordered on the macabre, just in case I didn't make it back. A few things in my house still have the labels I put on them: "Please return this to (name here), it's not mine, I borrowed it." The weekend came and went, and finally the big day had arrived.

I live about two minutes from the airport in Des Moines. Dad picked me up and took me there so I wouldn't have to pay for a week of parking, practically in my own neighborhood. He didn't even park, just pulled up to the entryway to let me out. No long goodbyes, no words of wisdom, just a quick "see ya in a week" exchange and I was off to wait for the plane to board. Not that we're a sentimental bunch, but I thought he might want to see me off in a more conventional way. It's not like he had anything else to do that day, but in retrospect it was nice to be on my own for the start of this landmark journey. I reflected on my life so far and felt my stomach do flips as I listened to Hiro songs in the terminal. It was *much* better than the music being piped-in.

I didn't make it through the Xray process very quickly because I went a little over-the-top on my present for Tom. I thought it would be appropriate to bring him something unmistakeably Iowa, since he probably won't be coming here anytime soon. A quick brainstorm with a friend led us to this, literally a piece of Iowa...

It's a geode, if you haven't already guessed, a little bigger than a softball, and cracked in half to display the pretty crystals inside. I took half of it with me to give to Tom, and you should have seen the looks on the NSA people's faces when they saw that through the Xray machine. They didn't say anything to me, I thought they might go all "Code Red" and shut the airport down until they realized that it wasn't a threat. I waited patiently (while they called for a supervisor) to explain to them that it would in fact make a really crappy bomb, then told them, "I know what you're questioning, and you're welcome to search the bag."

They never did open the box, just wiped it with an Oxy pad and told me I was free to go. But they weren't real nice about it.

I warned Tom about this as I gave it to him on my last day in L.A., but apparently he slipped it back to England unnoticed. Good for him, fight the power!

My good friend/next-door-neighbor/coworker/frequent dining companion (all the same person) was generous enough to give Tom a signed copy of one of her books, "Grasp the Stars" (hint: you can buy it on Amazon):

Luckily for him, Tom actually reads sci-fi, so I think he liked it. Jennifer knows I'm not a sci-fi reader, but gave me the copy that you're looking at above. I might read it someday...

So, two hours after boarding the plane, I'm in Dallas. No need to tell me we're over Texas, looking at all the brown grass and muddy ponds from overhead. It made me trip out a bit because it takes 11 hours to get there in a car, and I know that for a fact. My brother spent four years at UNT in Denton, so I made the trip probably a dozen times by car, and had already flown to and from DFW twice. So it was a strangely familiar place despite being so far away. I hit the airport McDonalds for some en-route comfort food, and an hour later, we were in the air again and headed to LA.

There's something about flying that makes me feel like we're all just pieces of dust floating around at random. You probably aren't the type that does this, but whenever I'm on a plane I make up stories about all the random people who I'm travelling with; you know, imagining the human-interest newswires about us some ten years from now, on the anniversary of the gruesome crash we'd all be in... 'Timmy had just reconciled with his father and hadn't seen him for twenty years... and he never got the chance.'

Well, I'm not that worried about plane crashes but there have been few happier moments in my life than when they tell me I can get off the plane. Otherwise I'm just stuck in there, breathing the same air as everyone, at the mercy of the crew. After a couple of hours of staring down into the nothingness that is West Texas/New Mexico/Arizona, the pilot comes on and announces, "we are beginning our descent into Los Angeles International..." and I'm freaking out by that point, for several reasons.

1.) The reality of Anime Expo is about to come. 2.) Midwesterner about to arrive in Los Angeles for the first time (sure, you can have my wallet!) 3.) No more air travel for a week, and the pilot was nice enough not to crash the plane!

Suffice to say we landed at LAX after I saw from overhead several of the famous 52-lane freeways I'd seen on TV so often. There's 'urban sprawl' and then there's the Los Angeles metropolitan area. Jeepers, it's huge.

As I boarded the shuttle to the hotel, an Asian-American guy a little older than me spied my MiniMoni t-shirt and says, "I know what you're here for..." and proceeds to talk my ear off about fansubs and how he's moving to LA from New York, and we wished each other well when we parted ways at the Sheraton. As we were driving in I looked out the window and could say nothing but "damn!" to myself as the shuttle driver drove like a madman past the Convention Center, the Staples Center, the Denny's Restaurant, Library Tower, all of which I had only seen in pictures. If I was still questioning whether these places really existed, here was proof-positive.

I figured that the driver knew how to get to the Westin Bonaventure, but knowing my luck I'd get the guy who says, "biggest hotel in town, you say? I've been driving shuttles for 20 years and I've *never* heard of it..." But he gets to the curb, and one of the uniformed bellhops opens the van door and says, "Welcome to the Westin Bonaventure!" I'm thinking 'holy crap, how did I get here?' Nothing at all had gone wrong!

I decided to get checked in and contact Tom from the room, although on my way to the elevator I thought I recognized him from afar in the huge lobby. Since we'd never met in person before, I didn't feel like going up to a random person and asking, "Tom?" as they gave me a blank stare in return. Turns out it *was* him, but how was I to know for sure until he came up to the room?

Before he arrived I took a moment to get a shot of the view from our hotel room. The second picture is a view of the crosswalk, right before AX pandemonium took over the town...

Next: Part 2: "Day -1, Day 0, and the Wonderful Registration Process. Til then...

Blasphemy!

2009-07-15T21:29:00.008-05:00

Another impossibly-long rant. (Pause to dust off soapbox.)

After returning from Los Angeles I felt a bit burned out on the whole Jpop thing, so I've been listening to a wide variety of music since then. Mainly, my new favorite form of music has turned out to be "post-war optimism" stuff like Guy Lombardo and Les Paul. I'll sneak the occasional Aiko/Mi-chan/Perfume songs in just to be fair, but as far as new-era Morning Musume is concerned, I'll be back to it in a while.

I ran out of the Hello!Party for a short while to avoid hearing a karaoke version of "Yume no Naka", from the very first Morning Musume album. Apologies to whoever that was, but I don't care if you're the reincarnation of Karen Carpenter; that song is just sacred in so many ways. So I got the urge to listen to that song a couple days ago and played the whole album for good measure, what the hell...

In many ways, the latest incarnation of Morning Musume is like Spicy Sweet Chili Doritos; they didn't exist a while back, and they're really good. By comparison, 'old-school' Musume is like the Cool Ranch Doritos we were downing by the metric ton in the '80s. It just felt right. My point with this admittedly goofy analogy is that, to be sure, what we saw at AX was certainly the same brand of Morning Musume, but what we saw was certainly not the same group it was 11 years ago. I know what you're thinking, it's not the same members, but there's more to it than just who's holding down the stage.

With the exception of "3, 2, 1 Breakin' Out" and maybe a couple of others, they've abandoned group harmonies in favor of a more powerful lead vocal style. The group has gone from the old-school cool harmonies to balls-out chaos (think 'Koko ni Iruzee!') to uber-cuteness (like 'Ai Araba...' and 'Mikan'). It's taken them this long to get back to a more mature, dare I say 'sexy' style with 'Shouganai Yume Oibito'. And I place the blame squarely on the 4th Gen.

Look at the numbers. Musume recruits Goto Maki, the world's head explodes, and Love Machine/Koi no Dance Site sell a collective 400 billion copies. Then comes the 4th Gen to KILL THEIR SALES. As much as I love them, once you bring in Rika, all the girls in the audience turn their attention elsewhere, then the crazy man-fans show up and take over the place.

To be fair, I'm pretty sure that Yossie has kept a lot of girls in the buying mood. Ladies, I'm not suggesting that you're *that way* but it's pretty obvious that the chicks dig Yossie, so don't freak out on me yet. She did what she could.

Aibon and Nono were good role models for girls for about eight weeks or so, until (as I've discussed) they decided to *not* be role models and just do whatever-the-hell.

It was Tsunku who took the group in the direction they went, who went for the male demographic overall and decided to stop catering to more feminine tastes. And suddenly, in place of the original group is this over-caffeinated group who's bouncing off the walls instead of paying tribute to the jazz masters of old. Maybe it's Ichii Sayaka's fault.

Sayaka (who, if I'm not mistaken, was referred to as "Kaa-san" by the other members) should never have left. Watch for her in old concerts, she's got soul (*and* she's super-bad!) She certainly looked and acted more like a grown-up than any of the current members, and for whatever reason, when she left it allowed the Nacchi's and Rika's to take over and wreck up the place. Observe, then, the cover of the second Morning Musume album with most of the old-school members:

Notice anything? Like the fact that they're not wearing any makeup? If I was a record-buyer of the female persuasion I'd be thinking to myself, these girls are bold. They're not afraid to be their true selves. And despite it all, yes, they're still really pretty. Would you expect the same kind of attitude from the group now?

Uh, don't hold your breath. And it's not that I don't like what they've become, far from it. But as I'm listening to the Kaa-san era albums, there's no mental connection, no spark in my brain that says "this is the group I saw". But you know what? Technically, this *was* the group I saw, where the name and the forces behind it are the exact same. Beyond that, it ain't selling quite as well these days as Love Machine did. The audience has shrunk. Where did all those women go?

What makes a hit record? Let's look at some contemporaries. SPEED, in some two-and-a-half years, sold enough records that when Morning Musume finally surpassed them it was a bona-fide ACCOMPLISHMENT. Women bought the hell out of those SPEED records because they didn't stray from the formula that made them big in the first place. Look hot, look cool, and you've got buyers on both sides of the aisle.

The Beatles sure sold a lot of records, just as many (if not more) to women who were totally after them like stalkers. It was their wide appeal in songwriting and general aloofness that gave them mystique. People bought their records in the hope of unravelling some of that enigma, and to this day it's still intangible in many ways. They're *still* selling records, forty years after they broke up.

And the greatest-selling record of all-time? Thriller. Why? Young, old, black, white, male, female... it doesn't matter, that record broke so many boundaries and has an appeal to almost any buyer on the planet.

Back to Morning Musume, July 2009. They're raking in the cash, they're arguably more successful than ever; but their goal should be nothing short of world-domination, to be the talent behind the as-yet-unnamed greatest-selling record of all time. One that makes Thriller look like some slip of the world consciousness before we all started buying really good music.

They *can*. But all this motto-kawaii-ness is keeping a few people from buying into the hype. It's time to get *real* again, and they're headed in that direction, it seems, so keep your fingers crossed. Before long, they'll each have a zoo and a theme park in their back yards, if they can remember how to keep everyone's attention. "Yume no Naka", indeed.

Last order of blasphemy is this: as far as every Japanese girl, famous or not (as I've heard) wants to be blonde and Pam Anderson-esque... again, let's get real. Every one of them in their current state, be they Kayo Aiko, Nagasawa Nao, Saito Michi, Hoshii Nanase, the Morning Musume's, the girls from SPEED (especially Hiro, no question) is cooler than I could ever hope to be. I'm just buying records, trying to unravel some of that enigma.

I'm Back From L.A.

2009-07-14T21:48:00.002-05:00

It's been a bit, but I'm preparing for a couple of ultra-long posts. Everyone so far has done a post of their experiences while in Los Angeles, and I've seen a lot of them; you should believe what they're saying. I haven't seen any inaccuracies.

I was lucky enough to get tickets in seventh row, center. Could see each of them perfectly. And as I found out, I'm more of a casual fan.

As far as the great seats at the show, I'd like to thank Matt_D for sharing his experience with my n00b-ness, Lampshade for being so GD organized for the ordeal, and Mozenator for being there in line behind the "guy who knew everybody", and for just generally being a cool guy, passing the time.

*Never* would have been so close to the stage without you guys. An experience I'll never forget. You're always welcome, if you decide that Iowa is a good place to go, which it's not.

Yeah, I'm fuckin' genki...

-jyoru

I'm off to L.A.

2009-06-30T00:27:00.003-05:00

Our good brother Tom informs us that he is alive and well in Los Angeles. So, it's my turn to make my way out there and see this US Morning Musume concert with my own two eyes.

Expect updates here and when I get back, you'll have updates coming out your ears. Anime Expo 2009 (with guests of honor Morning Musume), here I come... look out!

If I make it to the AX Idol finals I'll get to sing to Tsunku. If I don't, I'll be able to lose my voice at the Morning Musume concert/karaoke at Hello!Party; and perhaps miss the last signing of the Expo. I'm so torn...

"We respecto you, James Burown-do." -Kago Ai.

Til then, stay frosty.

-Jyoru, 6/29/2009

(Part Two) Kayo Aiko's Ninth Single

2009-06-23T19:20:00.022-05:00

Let's get to unravelling the mysteries of this video, shall we? I believe that many answers to the meaning of life are buried within. Click on a frame to see a larger, better picture (but you already knew that...).

Begin the video with, appropriately enough, some cloud art with the name of our star. Although the correct romanization of her name is either Kayou or Kayō, I've always preferred the 4x4 'Aiko Kayo'. It's really a matter of opinion, I suppose, but then again, Avex never used anything different.

Aiko comes out from behind a tree and a man in a stuffed bear costume (arm visible here) onto the waiting stage.

Aiko proceeds to rock you house, while the timid bear hides in the background.

Closeup of Aiko, where she mostly stares into the camera, except for one moment (shown above) where something distracts her. Maybe the caterer had just arrived, I don't know. Far from being disappointed with the fact that the editors left this 'error' in the final version, I just think it's awful cute, for whatever reason.

Aiko runs back to the bear and says, 'hey, we're filming a video, stop being shy and get your happy ass out here!'

Inexplicably, out come the cheerleaders (I mean, thanks, but why?) and the first one actually knocks the 'Kayo Aiko' sign about with her pom-poms. I don't think that was supposed to happen, but they left it in the video, nonetheless. If you think of the sign as the 'real' Aiko Kayo, then in reality, Aiko is being assaulted by a cheerleading squad, and now (understandably) your psychiatrist is seeing dollar signs.

The second verse is omitted from most youTube versions but this portion of the video *does* exist. For anyone who's only the seen the streaming version, here's another reason to buy the DVD versions of either 'Hold on to love' or 'Dolce'.

Two characters sit on a bench which wasn't there just a minute ago. For some reason she begins to assault him, going so far as to beat on him with his own hat. My research indicates that these two have a radio show in real life, but their names and the show are as yet unknown to me. But if you lived in Japan, you might have heard of them.

Aiko catches wind of the situation after singing for another minute while the beating goes on (thank goodness that lady doesn't have a knife) and runs over to chastise them in song.

Aiko is successful in getting the two to put aside their differences, and the hat resumes its use as a hat. Aiko looks more than a little proud of herself as she thinks about enrolling in a police program for abuse intervention.

Pure pandemonium as the cheerleaders, the bench couple, the dancing bear, and Aiko continue with the song.

Then, the bench guy reaches down to grab his hat which had been absent since the start of the chorus. Another thing that they probably just left in for no reason, but we never see why it fell off. Last we knew it was back on his head, but as he's reaching for it we're thinking 'that's right, he *was* wearing a hat...' Shows you the power of the hat lobbyists; they made sure it got adequate screen time. Kudos to Aiko's outfit, btw.

Night falls and Aiko is alone as the song winds down for the bridge. This is where the youTube videos cut to instead of showing the second verse.

Although they haven't yet become important to the video as of yet, here's the first appearance of a set-wrangler without his veil, and they dress in all-black, cover their faces, move the set around, and generally look like beekeepers. They will play on this similarity in just a moment. For now, my advice: whatever this guy says, do *not* go behind the tree with him. Your life will never be the same.

The 'beekeepers' come out and start moving every part of the stage around, even going so far as moving the bench while the couple still sits on it.

Yes, they may be set-wranglers but they look like beekeepers, and they know it. One of them does a single clap along with the beat, pretending to kill a fly (or perhaps a rabid bee).

So again, a scene of pandemonium. The cheerleaders, the beekeepers, the couple on the bench, the dancing bear, and Aiko, who's a-beboppin' and scattin' out the song's chorus.

High kicks and twirls from the cheerleaders, so we can get a few panty shots in this video. You're welcome, boys and girls.

As the song comes to a close, all of us, as brothers and sisters, dance together... the bench couple, the cheerleaders, Aiko, the dancing bear, and the 'beekeepers'.

Not usually shown in the youTube versions, Aiko mouths a distinctive 'arigatou gozaimashita' at the end. You're welcome, Ms. Kayo... I should say, 'de nada' so she can understand me in her native tongue.

And for whatever reason, this shot of the set as a whole to conclude the video, for about a second. Now go play Emil Chronicle Online (often shortened to ECO), ya jerks...

It's easy (and probably the most likely explanation) to write this off as a short film of random characters smashed together on a stage, done as amateurly (if that's a word) as possible. But come on, this video is random FTW. Let's see if it gets any deeper than that.

For starters, it seems that Aiko Kayo (in cloud form) is the 'real' Aiko Kayo, not the girl in the funny hat who sings. Constantly, omnipotently, it stalwartly looks down upon us and loves us for who we are.

The bear, in actuality a character from ECO, is us... it represents what most of us would do if our lives were confronted with a sexy singing pink witch, a couple fighting on a bench, cheerleaders, and beekeepers. We'd totally hide behind the tree, in this sense; but in a real sense, they're made out of cardboard, so no real protection at all.

The cheerleaders, in my opinion, represent morality, for they continue on despite adversity. People moving your cardboard set around? 'Yeah, keep going despite all!'

The couple on the bench, well, we've all been there before. Some woman hits you with your own hat, and eventually a sexy Japanese girl will tell her to stop, and you shall continue the possession of your hat as a hat, and not as a blunt object, even if it falls off inexplicably and you must pick it up from the ground.

The 'beekeepers', well, they're just a-damn moving everything in sight for their own pleasure. It's not a stretch of the imagination to envision them as the adverse forces in our lives. If/when they stop to kill a bee-gone-wrong, move your set-pieces back to their original location, it's not hard. After all, they're not portrayed as the smart ones in this video.

Lastly, it's Aiko herself (all-woman, I don't need further research) whose role is shrouded in mystery. If the 'cloud art' is indeed the 'real' Aiko Kayo, then who is this before us? She merely sings the song, looks hotter than your girlfriend (sorry, y'all), dances, and breaks up fights, but only when necessary. How does this fit into your life? She's a sexy pink witch. She's an anamoly. Don't hurt yourself too much thinking about it, but whoever she is, she makes the world a better place, but only when she's there. I imagine that the bench/hat guy would be dead of blunt force trauma if she hadn't intervened. The bench-girl is someone you don't mess with.

There's some... (thinking...)

There's a religious message behind all of this. What could it be?

(Part One) Kayo Aiko's Ninth Single

2009-06-14T20:45:00.006-05:00

...was released on January 25, 2006. The title is 'Hold on to love' [capitalization intentional], and the c/w is 'Callin'～ぼくを呼ぶ声～', the Japanese portion is pronounced 'Boku wo Yobu Koe', and can be translated as 'The Voice that Calls Me'.

This song came out about a month before I started listening to Aiko's music, and was the first Japanese song I ever learned, therefore it contains the first Japanese words I knew (besides 'ohayo', 'domo', and 'yume'). It also is slated to hold the distinction of 'the song I sang to Tsunku'. (It's payback for breaking my girl's heart, you big, ingeniously talented meanie!)

I'll just start by discussing the song itself, as the video will take some time to talk about, and I wanna make sure I do it justice. I'm fairly sure that there are some religious implications in that video, you'll see what I'm talking about, next time.

One of the stipulations for choosing a song to sing to Tsunku is that the song has to be from either an anime or a video game. Well, I'm in luck... 'Hold on to love' was in fact featured as the image song for Emil Chronicle Online, or ECO, a role-playing game of sorts which I don't know much about. I did some prodding around a while back and discovered (via a Spanish-language source) that somehow in the game, you can unlock Aiko's hat from the video, an 'I (heart) Aiko' t-shirt, and what looks to be a special move with Aiko connections (see, the energy coming off the character's hand is heart-shaped). They also give an honor to Aiko's dachshund Cocoa, the dog she holds atop her current blog.

Aiko and I will probably have another thing in common after the Anime Expo is said and done: we'd both have been overlooked by Tsunku in some capacity. (I've got REAL talent Simon, I mean... Tsunku; you don't know what you're talking about! I'm gonna get a record deal and be bigger than all these people! My mom says I'm a star!) Other things that I have in common with Aiko is that we are both humans, we both sing but don't dance very well, and we've both been depressed at some point simply because we can't join Morning Musume. I mean, seriously, it really got me down.

Anyway, the song is a moody but upbeat rock ballad that doesn't exactly fit Aiko's genre, if she has one. If you consider Aiko's genre to be 'Jpop', a word with an intentionally wide meaning, then it's equivalent to admitting that her songs span quite a spectrum and there's not a 'typical' Aiko sound except that all her songs sound good. Typical...

It's almost as if Weezer did the backing track for this song, so melodic and power-chordy; if Rivers Cuomo did a vocal track over the instrumental it wouldn't sound out of place. For a time I even wondered if Rivers and Aiko were romantically involved, as he does have a thing for Japanese girls and in truth married a gal named Kyoko Ito just a few months after this was released. I don't think that Aiko's main lyricist Kenn Kato (more info about this guy, please...) is a pseudonym for Mr. Cuomo, but this song does sound a lot like old-school Weezer.

Speaking of which, here's an awesome video of them performing a song about a Japanese girl, in Japan. Perhaps my most favoritest Weezer song, 'Across the Sea', 'douzo':

So where am I going with this? I don't know, really. There's so much in the video to talk about, so I might have a few more cohesive thoughts at that time. Until then, do some research and find this song (ahem, thanks 'yuffie101') and we'll discuss it in just a little while.

The c/w, a bit more upbeat -- a bit more 'typical' of Ms. Kayo's musical library -- shouldn't be forgotten. Rock-y, with plenty of synth sound, and marking the return of the really-into-it backup singers (last appearance: 'ring!Ring!!RING!!!'). In my opinion, not the best Aiko song ever, but adds a nice 5 minutes to her catalog. Typical...

In the Beginning...

2009-06-13T09:33:00.010-05:00

I was out on another search of the internet for Anything Kayo Aiko (so that my Society could aid in the Preservation of it), and didn't come up with much new stuff. I actually pulled up a few of the pics *I've* posted, so that's kind of a bummer. Obviously, if it's on this site, I already have it. So I decided to get some more Aiko pictures in circulation, and offer this little-seen glimpse into Aiko's life, pre-stardom, just being a regular ol' kid.

Here are 11 pictures of Ms. Kayo Aiko you've probably never seen before. I'll start with two photos taken just prior to her debut:

Aiko later gave that white stocking cap to LinLin so she could wear it in the 'Naichau Kamo' video. Just kidding. Shall we go back further? How about senior high school:

Still going... middle school:

More? Why yes... grade school:

Prepare for extreme cuteness. Kindergarten:

Yet further, roughly 400-600 *days* old:

Less than a year old? Got that, too. Here's one with her older brother, the only picture of him I've ever seen. You'd hardly recognize him now, I bet. I'm sure oniisan is quite protective of his baby sister, even today. So, sumimasen, oniisan, for posting this, but it's a wonderful, adorable picture:

Before you accuse me of stealing the Kayo family photo album, know that all these pictures are available on the Aiko Kayohaku DVD, so Ms. Kayo approves of displaying these pics to her fans. I used to think that only the people who bought the DVD should be able to see these, but there is so much more on there. I'm barely scratching the surface. Buy it! You get to hear Aiko speaking in hushed baby-talk about these pictures of herself as a wee one, and like everything else she does, *man*, it's so friggin' cute...

Okay, if your cold hearts haven't melted yet, here's one more, and I'm not sure she could get any younger. Yes, fans, this is Ms. Kayo Aiko herself. All together now: "AWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!"

If and when these pictures become commonplace on the internet, you'll surely remember where you saw 'em first. There are plenty more on the way. Have a good weekend, Aiko fans!

This Just In... This!? What is This?!?!?

2009-06-08T20:40:00.004-05:00

Ms. Kayo Aiko had a reasonably big announcement today:

So it's: 『懸賞TV　PRESENTS　第5回劇団ショートケーキ』Sunday, June 14th, 3PM.

Which, to the best of my ability is the '5th Troupe Shortcake', because there have been 4 before this.

Great. What the heck is this? To be sure, it's a TV show, or is it a live event? I think it's a live event, yeah, we'll go with that. I know Aiko does group shows and also that she's done one of these before. Doesn't mean much to me but it's good news for her, something different, anyway. Amongst the others, though, is she going to get a chance to stand out?

In the picture there are 17 girls total, and look closely, one *guy* on the right side... he doesn't look very happy about being there, either. Aiko's picture was stolen from her blog profile, and I imagine that all the others are. The promoters are just so jazzed about this that they didn't even bother to group everyone together for a picture!

Seems that a lot of these girls are swimsuit models or singers, so Aiko fits right in, er, or something. Without any recent releases of any sort, and having not been photographed in her skivvies for years, I don't think she can compete with the eye-candy that is the 'more popular' girls. Although I need only take a brief glance at that picture to know who *I* think is the best-looking of the lot.

Aiko can say she doesn't dance but we saw her do it at the Momusu audition. She can pretend she's not a swimsuit model but I can't forget the memories of 'Pretty Private'. And she can try to be something other than a singer, but I've got the over-two-hours-worth of music to prove that she does. A lot of idols' glory days tend to be short-lived, but the girl isn't even 24 yet. She's still working in showbiz, in some capacity, as a personality.

As a fan who wants to be supportive in any way possible, I gotta know: what the hell is this? If I knew, I'd totally be there.

I'm Handing Out Ten-Dollar Bills for Free...

2009-06-07T22:40:00.005-05:00

Follow these instructions explicitly, and you win a free $10 bill from me, personally:

1.) Go to Japan Files, register and/or sign in.
2.) Purchase Urbangarde's "Girls Only Live Twice".
3.) Listen to it at least ten (10) times.
4.) Explain why this isn't a good record at jyoru1211@gmail.com.
5.) Burn a physical copy and videotape yourself destroying that copy.
6.) On that same video, promise that you'll never listen to Jpop, ever again.
7.) Follow through on that promise and listen to bland music forever more.

...provided that you've included your street address in the original email, you will get a free $10 in the mail, shortly. You're now up a dime, and you don't ever have to listen to (how you say...) horrible Japanese music for the rest of your life.

Willing to fight for the integrity of this record with one hand tied behind my back, I am! My hired thugs will see to it that you never listen to Jpop for the rest of your life, because you hate it (and good music, in general) so much.

Think I'm kidding? Alexander Hamilton is pre-packed and can be shipped to your home in days...

The Pre-L.A. Required Reading List

2009-06-06T21:48:00.006-05:00

Ready to go? Hold on just a minute...

[Edit: I changed all the embedded videos to links, I was upset (to put it mildly) at the time it took to load this page.]

If you're like me (and hopefully you're not) you inject odd one-liners from TV shows and movies into everyday conversations, and unless you're talking to someone who's seen the same TV show or movie, it might get kinda awkward.

This post grew out of a conversation I had with Tom earlier today about him not having seen "The Princess Bride", which may not be my favorite movie, but nonetheless, the most complete sentence I can say in Japanese is the endlessly repeated phrase "Hello, my name is...", etc., in this clip. 'Douzo'...

The Princess Bride: My Name Is...

Having seen that, you'll have to laugh if I bust out my bad Japanese while you're around. As Tom mentioned, he and I will be roommates for the week and he'll have to put up with me (and vice versa) for the duration of AX and then some. We've got some common ground already, but just in case we need a quick laugh, or need to turn the conversation away from Jpop for a minute, here are a few more things I'd like anyone who's hoping to say 'hi' to have in common with me.

1.) Mystery Science Theater 3000 (MST3K), although it would take forever to learn every episode. I've been watching it for almost 20 years and still haven't seen every episode, nor do I 'get' every reference they make, but you gotta start somewhere. This particular episode, 'Cave Dwellers' is one of my favorites and has been in my VCR for months now. Here's a short clip, worth it for the very last line alone:

MST3K: Cave Dwellers (Breast Friends)

2.) John Pinette's "Get Out of the Line" bit; probably too relevant for AX and the ensuing chaos. (This *will* come up.) I had the honor of seeing him do this bit in person, and a co-worker and I (who share little else in common) still have a laugh over this, although we add (what he added when we saw him), "watch *me*!"

John Pinette: Lines Drive Me Crazy

3.) Dr. Katz, a low-key, badly-animated, but too-funny show about a psychiatrist who lives with his deadbeat 24-year-old son Ben. I own and have watched the entire series, and present two clips below:

Dr. Katz Professional Therapist: A Robbery with the Katz

Dr. Katz Professional Therapist: Ben + Phone - Dr. Katz = Impossible

4.) The Jerk, back when Steve Martin was nothing but funny. This may not be the best part of the film, but embodies my thought processes, humorously:

The Jerk: Are You Awake?

5.) Topper, a 1937 film (one of the first to be colorized, something I hate, but anyway...) Another low-key comedic style, but starring Cary Grant (never heard of him...) A bit of context; Cary Grant is the young, 'most valued stockholder' in the bank which Mr. Topper (the old guy) works. Topper is completely henpecked, while Mr. Kirby (Cary Grant) and his wife are bonafide alcoholics who spend the night in their car, on the street, prior to the annual stockholders' meeting. Watching this clip might be a bit of a challenge for those of you not into banking, or old movies, but the line "and no cents" is slowly making its way to my vernacular. Thanks to whoever put this up, this was indeed a hit back in the day, and Constance Bennett (the blonde wife of Cary Grant) is really cute. Back when functioning alcoholism was accepted and embraced:

Topper: Part 3

6.) Lasto, Beavis and Butt-head. A defining moment of my youth, although the non-video segments are funny, I'd never have been so open-minded about music; most of the videos they watched were already waaay out of rotation before they made a comeback of sorts, lampooned by the main characters. When Beavis and Butt-head watched videos (the calm within the storm), their comments were quick, relevant, and made of gold:

Beavis and Butt-head: Nirvana's 'Smells Like Teen Spirit'

Beavis and Butt-head: Men Without Hats 'Safety Dance'

There's also required listening, take Capsule's 'Jumper', for instance:

Capsule, 'Jumper'

Urbangarde's "Don't Take Off Your Sailor Fuku":

Urbangarde, 'Don't take off your sailor fuku'

and while we're in the mood, Perfume, the new single "One Room Disco", I've only heard a third of it, but it's fantastic, as always:

Perfume, 'One Room Disco'

Final item on my agenda: I just bought a Sony CyberShot camera, here's hoping I make it back from L.A. with the gol-durned thing, and a lot of photos to share. Here's my guitar for reference. I set up the background for effect, and also to see how detailed it can get, this is about 1/4 of the full-resolution:

You can see the woodgrain in the guitar and practically read the serial numbers on the cash. Mind you, the full-res version shows all the percussion instruments that the keyboard has to offer. Keep in mind that there was -zero- sunlight outdoors, and, when buying a good still-camera, something I hadn't thought about... make sure your camera has adequate flash power. It makes all the difference.

Less Than 30 Days 'Til...

2009-06-01T19:57:00.008-05:00

(Long and Winding Post...)

I'm not nearly ready to head out to AX but it's coming right up, and fast. I've got so many things to do before then; let me check my list... oh, no, I still haven't started my list yet! First thing on my list is to make a list.

The purpose of this post (if I have one) is to remind myself that it's almost go-time, and to make sure I start getting a few things done before I go to Los Angeles. Which reminds me: if you're reading this, and you're gonna be there too, let me know with a comment below, or exchange email addresses with me at jyoru1211@gmail.com. I will definitely be down for meeting other Morning Musume fans and having a good time... Who knows what will happen?

My mind is reeling with questions at this point. How will I survive this? What's the concert going to be like? How far away am I going to be from the stage? Will I get to see them up close at some point? Will I, even though I'm quite certain I've taken every possible step so far to do so, actually see the concert at all? So many things could happen between now and then, I'm just trying to stay calm and to get prepared.

With each passing day the tension rises, both good and bad. Good, in that: I'm beyond excited to go support this group and see them in person; bad, in that: I'm not all too keen on flying and travelling to places unfamiliar to me. Just have to keep a good mindset of, 'this is going to happen and it's going to be one of the most surreal moments of my life, and I'll love every minute of it.' I've been a bit of a local killjoy lately and I'm hoping that this opportunity to be far, far away from home (yet strangely, closer to things I hold dear) will give me a chance to lighten up a bit and, hopefully, I'll even bring some of that change back home with me. We'll see.

One of the most dangerous things about being a fan of Japanese pop music is that eventually you'll like so many artists that it seems impossible to keep up with them all!

Before I headed over to JapanFiles to (legally) download the B-side to 'Naichau Kamo' (the one MM song I didn't have), I read a little of Matt_D's praise for Urbangarde. I had previewed some of their songs at Japanfiles a while back and thought they were fairly interesting (an understatement), but after seeing the video below, I simply had to buy that record. Gave the entirety of "Girls Only Live Twice" a few spins today and it's like falling in love, all over again.

With an adequate supply of creativity and artistry, what we have here is music made *by* crazy people *for* crazy people, so I'm enjoying it a lot. Sorry if I seem like a copycat, Matt, but I love this video, too... it should be posted on every website, ever. There are so many things I want to know about this band, like, would they be willing to play at my birthday party next year, and every year after that?

Any capsule fan should be able to appreciate this stuff. Switch back to capsule after hearing this, and it's still awesome, but feels a lot more straightforward. There are a couple of really cool slower songs on the Urbangarde record, but to me, right now, it's all about the unhindered ballistic insanity that's going on. Quite the welcome find before my journey to a different world.

I usually don't have problems with stage fright, but whilst I'm in L.A., if I can make it to the AX Idol microphone (in front of Tsunku) without losing my lunch, I'll be doing well. Listened to quite a few Sharam Q songs today and, yes, now it's starting to freak me out. Can't say he's the best singer that ever lived, but he's got me beat, for sure. I still just want to be able to say that it really happened, that he actually heard me sing a Kayo Aiko song. Can't beat that. With that as the goal, I'll be fine.

Ever intent on keeping my mind as open as it possibly can be, I did a bit more research on Los Angeles. Let's not forget that Los Angeles had to steal its own water supply because it's in an unlikely place for a city so large.

Let's not forget that, among other iconic stars, Rudolph Valentino made a living in the area and was laid to rest in nearby Hollywood. Saw a Valentino performance (and not clips of the hubbub surrounding his funeral) for the first time in my life, last night.

I even got a chance to see some clips of James Dean and watch a part of "Rebel Without a Cause" for the first time (before you jump on me about this, remember that the list of movies I haven't seen is endless). I've seen plenty of 'JD' imagery in my life, and the guy is an icon, regardless of what your own opinion may be. So far, "Rebel" seems like a good movie, and it doesn't have to be the Best Film Ever to merit a viewing; but I have good reason to believe that had he not died in his prime, he might possibly have been worshipped a little less. There, I said it.

The old Hollywood scene is so fascinating to me, because so many celebrities' lives were so intertwined (and some of those relationships continue today). So if I get the chance on an off-day, I may attempt to journey to Hollywood, see a few sights and say that I've been there.

Inevitably with me, the focus comes back to music, and the epitome of Southern California music was arguably done by the Beach Boys (you thought I was going to say Snoop Dogg, didn't ya? Well, I like his music, too.)

I discovered Pet Sounds years ago and join the chorus of praise for that record. Until the day you can come up with a better one, I don't want to hear any contrary opinions. Even Paul McCartney (okay, fire away...) once said of the album, "I figure no one is educated musically 'til they've heard that album." Strong words, good album, good group. Might be trendy to think the Beach Boys are cliché but when you strip away all the furor over the group, shut your mouth, and open your ears, they achieved their end-goal of creating beautiful music, forever to be associated with this part of the world, ugly as it can be at times.

It's not as if there aren't some very fascinating stories to be found in the Midwest. And it's also not as if people who've spent the majority of, or even just a small part of, their lives in Southern California don't have reason to hate the area. Still, as a music and film geek, there's more to be found out there than there ever will be here. Find a list of recordings done in Los Angeles, and chances are that you'll see at least one you couldn't live without. Les Paul comes to mind at this point.

So what could be more of a milestone in the life of a full-fledged wota and music/film geek, than to travel to this legendary place, not far from where once-obscure personalities like John Wayne and Johnny Carson, and even Ronald Reagan (look it up) had a common starting point, just to see Morning Musume perform for the first time on the US mainland?

I have arrived. No, wait, I haven't yet. But soon, I will arrive!

Kayo Aiko's Eleventh Single

2009-05-30T09:49:00.006-05:00

...was released on - what? Yeah, I skipped 9 and 10, I'll come back to those. This is MY site, I'll do what I want!

Kayo Aiko's eleventh single was released on November 15, 2006. The title is 'cosmic cosmetics' and the c/w is 約束の樹の下で... which can be pronounced 'Yakusoku no Ki no Shita de...', and can be translated as 'Promise Under the Tree'.

Aiko was continuing a string of upbeat A-sides, beginning with 'Kanojo', then 'Hold on to love', then 'HOME MADE STAR', and there was no video for this song or the previous one. I think by this point they decided that you were either *on* or *not on* the Aiko boat, and it was going to sell whether or not they made a PV.

I had pre-ordered both the limited and regular editions from CDJapan so it was in my hands but days after it was released. I really liked the songs from the first listen. Standard practice was to put the A-side on repeat for the first couple days or so. The first time I really listened to the c/w, I was moving my couch, not an easy task with a hide-a-bed tucked inside. Still, I was struck by how gorgeous the song really is.

So here's the deal, fans and readers... this single is, like, the polar opposite of 'Little planets'. Again, you get a seemingly-odd juxtaposition of quirky/beautiful songs, only this time, the performances are switched. Let me explain.

'cosmic cosmetics' is a fun and quirky song. Aiko's vocals sound very restrained, very cool and competent. She's not going wild singing this song, just having fun and being rather cutesy.

On the c/w (again, a beautiful slow song) the vocals are free... not that she's going wild here, either, but by the end, there's eight or more layers of Aiko vocals, just killing you with beauty.

This isn't a case of 'if you can only afford *one* single...' BUY THIS! It's worth every penny or rupee that you'll spend for it. BUY THE G*DDAMNED SINGLE ALREADY! Lie, cheat, steal, pillage, and kill (if necessary). You *will* be able to afford it.

When this came out, I remember someone saying it 'sounds exactly like what I thought it would'. What the hell does that mean? Was that person so in tune with what Aiko was doing that when the time came to hear the single, he thought, 'I've already heard this.'? Now I suppose that if you're familiar with Aiko's work, and you know that the title is 'cosmic cosmetics', you could probably picture in your mind what it might sound like. But to write it off completely because it sorta matched your preconceptions, well...

If I ever find the person that said that, I will tie them up and force them to listen to the A-side for a week straight. It wouldn't be so bad, actually... it's a damn good song, one of my absolute favorites, Aiko or otherwise. I'm not just being objective - there's a real and tangible reason why this is one of the best.

Reason why: Nakata Yasutaka. Yeah, that's him, the guy who produces Perfume (YEAAAAHHHHH!) and also, a little outfit called 'capsule' (YEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!).

I don't know how they managed to wrangle him in to do this track and I really don't need to know. Guy's a friggin' genius when it comes to pop music. What's odd is how different this song is from his Perfume/capsule output. It's got his 'signature' all over it, to be sure... but I think that he approached it from a different angle, because he totally nails the 'Aiko sound'. If every one of Aiko's songs was top-of-the-heap, cream-of-the-crop (it's not a big stretch of the imagination), this guy (or someone with a similar sense) would have produced them. He got his vision across and at the same time put Aiko on a silver platter. This single made me into a Perfume/capsule fan, a die-hard one, in fact.

So are we clear? If these two songs aren't in your music collection, you don't have a collection yet, and I feel sorry for you. As a warning, it may sound exactly like what you thought... 'cuz if you're thinking, 'awesome', you're right.

If you can manage to get the limited edition, chances are that yours will come complete with Aiko's 'John Hancock'... like this:

It's $18.47, for cryin' out loud. Thank you in advance for your cooperation. (Never use that phrase in a business letter, it's presumptuous and it makes you sound like a screamin' idiot.)

Ienai Kotoba, Live, Duet with Shimokawa Mikuni

2009-05-25T13:55:00.004-05:00

Whilst I'm in the embedding mood, here's a video I just found a few minutes ago. More firsts: first time I've seen Aiko sing this song live, first time I've seen someone else singing a Kayo Aiko song, and first time I've seen Aiko with a live band. All in all, nicely done, but why couldn't they harmonize? The guitar solo is much different from the original.

From November, 2004...

Kayo Aiko's Eighth Single

2009-05-25T13:07:00.000-05:00

...was released on July 27, 2005. The title is 彼女はゴキゲンななめ, which is pronounced 'Kanojo wa Gokigen Naname' and can be translated as 'She's in a Bad Mood'. The c/w is さすらいの天使, which is pronounced 'Sasurai no Tenshi', and can be translated as 'Wandering Angel'.

So it was back to the upbeat A-side for Ms. Kayo, and she has not since released a slow single. While it seems that "Little Planets" gained her a lot of exposure, or at least was the most expensive video she'd ever made, why the powers-that-be decided to go in a completely different direction for this next song is not clear.

Between singles, the DVD "Aiko Kayohaku" was released, which featured all seven of her videos thus far, and newly-produced interludes that featured Aiko in all sorts of 'fetish gear', a cutsie apron during the cooking segment, a tennis dress and a golf outfit for the sports segment (think Arnold Palmer, not Payne Stewart), a Minnie-Mouse-ish dress with a polka-dot hair bow for the discography. And, as a bonus for us boys, there's the added luxury of seeing Aiko in a short dress with thigh-high boots, as she gives the introduction and, as well, for the send-off.

"Aiko Kakohaku" is still a must-have for anyone who wants to be a member of the S.P.A.K.A., so here, let me show you where it's at, oh, where's that link, hang on... here it is, sorry about that.

There are a few exclusives on the disc, not the least of which is a series of photographs of Aiko from age 0-19, and she was never *not* cute, by the way.

So, speaking of Aiko being cute, the PV for 'Kanojo wa Gokigen Naname' was one of the first videos I saw, and definitely the first one I played over and over and over. Lots of closeup shots of Aiko's facial features, none of which could even be remotely described as 'disturbing' or 'not pretty'... those eyes, those lips, those... nose!

The female Japanese Ramones rock out in the lava-lamp infested background. N-squares and split-screens abound.

Aiko wears three different outfits in the duration of this video: one, an aqua Galsville t-shirt and white spring skirt, another, a purple corset-inspired top with a black ruffled skirt and thigh-high boots (yum), and a third pink pleather dress with the most outlandish hair bow ever made. All three outfits are flattering, to say the least, and I'd like to take Aiko shopping someday, just to see her try on anything she wants. She switches between outfits by jumping in and out of a 'bar' of outfits. She lets out a frustrated scream. I'll describe no further, you will see for yourself...

The c/w 'Sasurai no Tenshi' is probably my least favorite Aiko song, because it's just kind of 'there' rather than totally awesome. The music is upbeat, but doesn't really go anywhere. It's the least likely to be chosen as *the* song to represent Aiko, and whenever I get in the mood to listen to Aiko, this isn't my first choice. Still, it's Aiko, so I've got to give it that.

Although 'Kanojo' is a spectacular song with a very well-suited video, the single probably isn't for the casual fan. In fact, it's the only Aiko single I haven't got, since both songs were later included with her first album 'Dolce', the first Aiko CD I bought. This should change in the near future, as the DVD that comes with the single has a 'making of' that I've never seen. After all, the word 'anything' is part of the acronym 'S.P.A.K.A.' I really need to follow my own rules here...

I Like Everything...

2009-05-14T20:31:00.009-05:00

...don't you just *hate* that? Warning: diatribe follows.

One of the things I accidentally left out of my Things that Tick Me Off post is something that I suppose doesn't tick me off, but instead, puzzles me to no end. People who say that they 'hate' (no, I mean really, *hate*) a certain idol or idols, yet are just as much in love with their favorite idol as I am with Ms. Kayo Aiko.

People who worship one idol and outwardly despise another... these are people that I don't want to know, really. For example, there are plenty of Kusumi-haters out there (you know who you are, you heartless bastards!), and also, plenty of people who love to hate Ms. Mitsui Aika (pictured above). When I look at that picture I don't feel anything even approaching animosity. I used to be indifferent to Aika, because to me she was relatively unknown and there were plenty of other Musume to focus on.

Look at my track record so far... I reviewed the Girls Box Movie (and liked it), brought up some of my favorites: SPEED, Perfume and Capsule, every Morning Musume album, Slayer... and I had good things to say about all of them. So why post a picture of Aika and say anything negative about her? Well, I'm not going to. I like Mitsui, and I like her alot. Damn right I do.

Yeah, I could nitpick and deconstruct her, mention how she's not as good of a dancer or singer as (insert random Musume here). I could talk about how the nickname 'Moonface' is seemingly apt -- Paul, we need another Chris post -- or how she actually did look kinda scary to me when she joined up... maybe it's all those teeth, she looks like she *does* bite:

..and if she does, well, no cutting into the queue! I'm in my rightful place, waiting to get bitten. But I digress.

Bringing up such a polarizing personality as Ms. Mitsui might get a reaction from some people, good or bad. I've been on both sides of the fence with her, from in the past possibly wishing she'd go away, to now, where I'm contemplating starting a site dedicated to her... hmm, moonface.blogspot.com? Naw, I just don't have the time; besides, if anyone, it's Saito Michi, then Nacchan, then a toss up between Sasaki Nozomi or Ogura Yuko.

I remember buying some °C-ute songs from iTunes, looking at the cover, and wondering, 'who *are* these people?' Some of them, I swore, I would not be a big fan of, especially Chisato, with this haircut:

I tried to think positively, that she was just as much a part of the group as all the rest, bad haircut and photograph and all. I just couldn't get past how boyish and strange she looked. Luckily, my reaction wasn't enough to go online and trumpet how much I despised her, nor ask ad nauseam, 'what's up with *this chick*?' By that point I'd had enough experience to know that if she was any good, I'd find out sooner or later. Nowadays, her signature adorns my wall, along with those of the rest of the °C-ute ensemble. And I treasure it. Chisato, sweetheart -- you ever need a place to crash, lemme know...

So after that ordeal, and seeing Mitsui Aika in a swimsuit (yowza!), it's not like I'm going to disown her as a Musume or as a person. All readers -- love her or hate her -- I'll say 'hi' for ya when I see her in Los Angeles.

Sorry, but this blog will remain a place of praise. Might be a little tiresome after a while if you keep reading my reviews and find out that I like everything I see or hear. Well, I don't, actually, and if you knew me better you'd be tired of my complaints by now. But when it comes to Japanese pop music and idol culture, I'm kind of biased.

My previous post mentioned how music is good for you, in a very real way. And I thought that finding Berryz Kobo, °C-ute, and Kusumi Koharu was a quasi-fountain-of-youth, bordering on the legend of Elizabeth Báthory in terms of extending my life without scientific proof.

With all the real things I have to complain about, Japanese pop songs (and the personalties behind them) are nice to have. Furthermore, none of these girls would hurt a fly (or you), unless they asked me to do the honors, whilst playing up the whole cute-and-scared angle.

So why all the hate?

It goes without saying that most of the internet is populated by well-meaning but loudmouthed teenagers who simply *must* project their thoughts into the world, whether those thoughts are rational or not. But even adults want to spread hate about their least-favorite idol, and these are the people I'm speaking out against.

If you can't stand Japanese pop, fine; but please, don't be a hypocrite. I'm already puzzled enough.

For the last time, then, here goes. If you're a Jpop lover, but still claim to hate certain idols, I've got to call you out, here and now. Of all the things you might have reason to complain about, why are you so down on some teenage girl from Japan who sings and acts cute?

Are you more attractive than she is? Are you worth more as a person than she is?

Then why the heck aren't people watching your videos and buying your records?

Again, love to Ms. Mitsui Aika, even if it makes me seem uninteresting. Seriously, why do you harbor hatred for specific little Japanese girls?

As a postscript, does anyone know Mitsui's 'concert color'? Or, For-The-Win, can anyone point me to a list of *all* the Musume's colors? I want to show my support (and recognize others' allegiances) at AX, 48 days from today.

Music = Good for You

2009-05-12T18:19:00.003-05:00

Ordinarily, reading news on CNN doesn't lift my spirits, but I read an article yesterday which I'd like to share both as a musician and as a Jpop enthusiast. Get ready for a windfall: listening to music is healthy for your heart and "may slow down the aging process." And I thought I was just severely damaging my hearing.

Some of the more interesting points: listening to music you enjoy is a stress-reliever and it causes blood vessels to expand, lowering the risk of heart attacks and strokes. It "gives [you] an overall feeling of good, well-being -- a sense of euphoria in some cases." Music has been shown to improve self-esteem and mood. Thanks, Ms. Kayo...

Another interesting thing is that listening to music you *don't* like has the opposite effect on the body.

Lastly, it's important to have variety in your listening. "Listening repeatedly to the same tune diminished the music's effects on the body. 'You just don't get that boost if you listen to the same song over and over again," says the doctor who conducted this study. 'You need to vary your songs, so when you hear the song fresh, it brings back the sense of joy and opens up the system.'"

All the more reason to live it up with your favorite music from all genres, and put on that Rammstein album when the Berryz Kobo album finishes.

Read the full article here

Kayo Aiko's Seventh single...

2009-05-09T21:30:00.000-05:00

was released on May 25, 2005. The title is 'こころの惑星～Little planets～', with the Japanese portion of the title pronounced 'Kokoro no Wakusei', which could be translated as: 'Planet of the Heart'. The c/w is 'STEP BACK IN TIME', which is a cover of a song originally performed by Kylie Minogue.

It had been roughly half a year since Aiko released a single, having promoted four singles in one month the prior November. It was apparently time for a change, as the publicity for the song seemed to present her in a more mature fashion than anything released up to this point. Interestingly enough, this -- one of the most beautiful Kayo Aiko songs ever -- was paired up with one of her quirkiest songs. 'STEP BACK IN TIME' has yet to be included on any other release; ergo, if you want Aiko's entire catalog, you'll have to hook yourself up with this single.

I've never seen Aiko attempt to sing either song live, and I'm okay with that. Somehow the whole thing came together for one-time-only and the result was arguably the pinnacle of Aiko's career in music so far (I *am* keeping my hopes up). 'Little Planets' is such an exhilarating song. Only Kayo Aiko could sing a slow song like this - one that speaks of finding hope beyond all hope, bringing us to the point where all hope is lost, and then bring us back to where all is right with the world. *Only* Kayo Aiko can do this. Don't try and offer suggestions that anyone could do it better, because I'm just not listening to you.

According to Aiko herself, the video was shot in Guam. Guam this, and Guam that, she says, and if I'm incorrect, then I not only can't understand Japanese, but I also can't understand *anything* because she says it fifty times in the span of a couple minutes on the Aiko Kayohaku DVD 'discography' clip.

Forgetting all other past and possible future endeavors, I'll just say this: if you wanna say something bad about Ms. Kayo Aiko, think about this before you say anything at all... have *you* ever been flown to Guam for a video shoot? And when you got there, did *you* outshine the scenery?

The video, in terms of plot, isn't much to talk about. She hangs out in a field near the ocean, by some rusted bleachers (baseball bleachers, I'm assuming), and the video's producers have set up an easel and a wooden chair in the vicinity. She hangs out there, looking sullen, then sings along, then eventually sings the remainder of the song in a cathedral-type set.

While in the 'cathedral', Aiko might not look her cutest, nor is it the most 'I must have her now' moment of her career, but it's hard to imagine that any human being could possibly have been any more gorgeous than this. If there's better, I'd really like to see it. Really.

All in all, if you must force yourself to buy only *one* Kayo Aiko single, I'd say this is it. You'll get one of her best slow songs up front and one of her peppiest songs on the reverse side.

As a post-note, this song (Little Planets) was used for the first ending to the anime "Law of Ueki", which I understand has a reasonably good following. To tell you the truth, I'll let someone who knows about this series fill you in on it, I'm too busy enjoying the music.

Only five more single recaps to go, hang in there...

55 days, 23 Hours, 29 Minutes

2009-05-07T00:31:00.003-05:00

My 50th post, however weak the subject matter. Hi, Aiko! Hi, Los Angeles!

An open letter to Ms. Kayo Aiko

2009-05-07T00:05:00.000-05:00

...wherever she may be.

Dear Ms. Kayo,

It's been quite some time since your last recording, and for the moment I'm not expecting anything new in the near future. I keep seeing on your blog that 'Kingyo' is spending time together, and that your fellow Girls Box Movie stars Nacchan and Saito Michi have been close by as well. While I understand that you're really good friends, it's hard to see you all together and wonder where things stand professionally and where they might go from here.

For instance, not more than a month ago, you posted a 'purikura' photo of 'Kingyo', (that's you, Yu, and Nao), and the wording on the photo was "Lovers High". I have seen dead horses get pummeled, but that song came out almost two years ago, and as I've mentioned before, the record company wasn't even nice enough to give y'all a second song. How dare they? All they need is a PC with ProTools on it, a good couple of hours, and there you go, internet-only single. Why this isn't happening is beyond me.

So, what else are you up to these days? Seems like quite a bit, actually, from what I've seen. You're cooking, doing stuff for 'Max My Ride' on Mtv Japan, apparently, still got the gig on the Cheer Up*Indies TV show (and I haven't yet seen a full episode). There's a youTube channel for that show, and it has the most random clip collection I have ever seen. Not full episodes, nor a chronological filing system, just, 'here's a video...' Would somebody please let me know what she's up to... can I get a list of some sort?

What's new with me, you ask? Well, I'm taking an unprecedented trip this summer to see some of your contemporaries at Anime Expo. This blog got a nice write-up on International Wota and this should hopefully steer any current or potential fans to this site so we can congregate and demand more Aiko for the West. Lately I've had a few more comments than usual; in fact, I'm actually getting a few comments these days. (By the way, sh1zuk4, Rammstein's 'Herzeleid' album *is* the best album on the earth -- I *love* bold statements like that, btw.)

Last and certainly not least, I just want to let you know that one way or another, Tsunku *himself* is going to hear one of your songs, whether he likes it or not. As he has agreed to be a judge at the Anime Expo 'AX Idol' contest, and as I have agreed to be a contestant in said contest, I've decided to bring the song 'Hold on to love' as my showpiece. (The rules of the contest have deemed it necessary to pick a song from either a manga or video game, so, from a video game, it is, Aiko-style).

Somehow the stars have aligned (I'm overdoing it, bear with me), and my odyssey of Jpop discovery will come full-circle. From discovering you three years ago -- then (by branching out) discovering the group you tried out for -- to personally presenting one of *your* songs to the brains behind that outfit... oh, it's all just too much to handle. Hopefully within a couple of months I'll be able to tell a story that begins with, 'so I was singing a Kayo Aiko song to Tsunku...'

Someday, Ms. Kayo; someday, I'll tell you all about it.

-jyoru

Morning Musume Albums, In Order of Favorite, and Why

2009-05-06T22:45:00.004-05:00

In my Platinum9DISC recap I had rattled off the order of my favorite Morning Musume albums, but unless you've heard them all, it probably sounded like I was calling the winning lottery numbers, except it was less exciting. Without having memorized them, it's doubtful that anyone would do the research necessary to figure out what I meant, anyway, so I guess I've got some explaining to do. For those who may be unfamiliar with (some or all of) the albums, read on, and maybe one will sound intriguing to you.

Now, they're called 'albums', although they usually lack a certain sense of cohesiveness that you'd find on, say, a Pink Floyd album, or even a Slayer album. Without exception, a Morning Musume album is compiled from several singles and the remaining songs are a mix of non-B-sides, re-arrangements, and remixes. It wasn't until just now that I've wondered why they would even put together an album at all, if they've promoted and sold singles by the truckload. I guess it's just something else to sell, but that doesn't mean they are devoid of any artistic merit. Oh, on the contrary...

Now, a typical American album is usually released either simultaneously with, or soon after, the first single. In Morning Musume's case, usually all the singles were released and then later inserted into the albums, so along my previous statements, they're usually a mishmash of old, new, and something strangely familiar. I'll point out the singles featured on each album but will mainly focus on what can only be found on the record. Oh, and this list will *not* contain Cover You or Platinum9. Deal?

For all newbies: every album title has a number in it that tells you what album it is. Sounds uncreative, but it's really a good way, in my opinion, to keep them all straight and as well provide a shorthand for naming each album, so you don't need to know the *exact* title to figure out which one somebody's talking about, just a number.

9th favorite: Ai no Dai 6 Kan (singles: Namida Tomaranai Hougaku, Joshi Kashimashi Monogatari, ROMAN ~MY DEAR BOY~
I guess I can't say that I have a solid reason for putting this album at the bottom of my list. It's not that it isn't good, but maybe more that it can (and does) get better than this. Two 'Kashimashi' songs on the same record takes some dedication as a listener.
COOL SONGS: Haru no Uta, Dokusenyoku, Koe
PERKY&QUIRKY: Sukiyaki, Chokkan (the 1st), Lemon Iro to Milk Tea
FILLER: Joshi Kashimashi Monogatari (the 2nd), SHIP! TO THE FUTURE, HELP!! (not the Beatles song)

8th favorite: Sexy8Beat (singles: Aruiteru, Egao YES Nude, SEXY BOY, Ambitious!)
Any album that begins with an ultra-awesome song like 'Genki+' is setting itself up to go downhill from there. It's a great way to start an album, but the rest needs to have that same bite. Not surprising that I would consider this one of the most forgettable albums from this group. One of this album's downsides, in my opinion, is that it just seems too short. Without the singles it might make a nice EP, but there's a lot of laid-back in those songs.
COOL SONGS: Genki+, Mirai no Taiyou, Haru Beautiful Everyday, Sono Deai no Tame ni, Takara no Hako (Rainbow Pink on a slow song!!!)
PERKY&QUIRKY: Shanimuni Paradise, Be Positive
FILLER: Aruiteru... It was already on 7.5, there goes another 5 minutes of your life. It's not that I dislike the song but wonder why it had to be so prominent amongst all the other *really good* material.

7th favorite: 7.5 Fuyu Fuyu Morning Musume. Mini! (singles: Aruiteru)
Not *technically* an album, but properly an EP; besides that damned 'Aruiteru', it's all otherwise unreleased material, with practically everybody, and then some, getting a chance to shine on their own, or in a small group. Hagiwara Mai and Okai Chisato get bit parts in Fujimoto Miki's song, and, dare I say, it makes the whole album worth listening to.
COOL SONGS: Yuki / Ai x Anata ≥ Suki, Kotatsu no Uta ~jyuken story~
PERKY&QUIRKY: Kira Kira Fuyu no Shiny G, Samui kara Fuyu da mon!, Merry Pin Xmas (the *yardstick* for all things 'perky' and/or 'quirky')
FILLER: Put 'Aruiteru' on one album, and that would've been fine, but it shows up *again* on #8? Why?

6th favorite: First Time (singles: Summer Night Town, Morning Coffee, Ai no Tane)
Just pure blasphemy to put the debut album this far down the list, huh? I attribute some of the unpopularity to the fact that it's one of their most unfamiliar albums, from my perspective. Although it's full of those great harmonies that made 'old-school-Musume' really good, there's some better music from this group. Can't say the first album was best, that would imply that they never got any better from there.
COOL SONGS: Yume no Naka, Wagamama, Mirai no Tobira, Samishii Hi
PERKY&QUIRKY: Dou ni ka Shita Doyoubi (a new 'classic disco song), Good Morning, Utsosuki Anta
FILLER: (really, there isn't any... reconsidering the rankings at this point)

5th favorite: 4th "Ikimasshoi!" (singles: The Peace, Mr. Moonlight, Souda! We're Alive)
Some really good album tracks on this one. All you hardcore fans will be waiting a while for my apology for ranking this so high. One of the most powerful 3-song-blocks ever recorded are on this record. Pump yourself up some morning on the way to work with the trifecta which begins with the title track.
COOL SONGS: Hajimete no Rock Concert, Ikkimashoi!, Densha no Futari, Honki de Atsui, Nanni mo Iwazu ni
PERKY&QUIRKY: Ii Koto Aru Kinen no Shunkan, Otoko no Tomodachi, Suki na Senpai
FILLER: Dekkai Uchuu ni Ai ga Aru, Renai Revolution (13nin version... same as the standard single with unfamiliar and weaker vocals where the graduated members' voices should be, I will *always* skip this version, because I've heard it once, that's enough.)

4th favorite: Rainbow 7 (singles: Manpower, Osaka Koi no Uta, Iroppoi Jirettai)
There's a certain magic to these recordings, and it's fairly obvious that they've hit their stride on this one. It closes with 'Kashimashi 3', not an original idea, but you haven't had to sit through another version to get to this one. Maybe it's the 'Kusumi Kusumi... Kusumi Kusumi' that keeps me entertained through the closer. The album gets you all messed up inside and releases all that tension by closing with a familiar ass-kicker.
COOL SONGS: HOW DO YOU LIKE JAPAN?, INDIGO BLUE LOVE, Mushoku Toumei na Mama de, Purple Wind (a tribute to Prince, apparently)
PERKY&QUIRKY: Aozora ga Itsumade mo Tsuzuku You na , Rainbow Pink (another yardstick for perky/quirky), Sayonara SEE YOU AGAIN
FILLER: Chokkan 2 (remix), Joshi Kashimashi Monogatari 3

3rd favorite: 3rd Love Paradise (singles: Love Machine, Koi no Dance Site)
This album is full of filler *and* songs I've heard a million times, but it's probably as cohesive as it gets. Is it my fault that two of these songs have been top-selling singles, and two of them have PV's despite not being singles? 'WHY' gets a great honorable mention for being the only MM song in existence (I think) where each individual syllable is sung by a different member.
COOL SONGS: Kuchizuke no Sono Ato, DANCE suru no da!, Omoide, WHY
PERKY&QUIRKY: Aisha Loan De, Harajuku 6:00 Shuugou
FILLER: Ohayo, Lunchtime, and Oyasumi... because they're mostly talk-tracks that bind the album together, and Suki da Yo... not necessarily filler, but the producer decided to put *just the rhythm track* on one side of the stereo spectrum and *everything else* on the other, it's very disorienting, especially with headphones.

2nd favorite: Second Morning (singles: Manatsu no Kousen, Memory Seishun no Hikari, Furusato, Daite HOLD ON ME!)
This album, in my opinion, took what the first had to offer and threw out the trash. Still plenty of cool harmonies, but I think they stepped it up a bit. Not much here to look down upon.
COOL SONGS: NIGHT OF TOKYO CITY, Suki de x5, Senkou Hanabi, Otome no Shinrigaku
PERKY&QUIRKY: Papa ni Niteiru Kare, Da Di Du De Do Da Di
FILLER: Koi no Shihatsu Ressha (album version), Never Forget (large vocal mix), just because I'm looking for something to fit the category. As individual songs, they serve their purpose, but on this album, mostly 'skippable'.

FAVORITE: No.5 (singles: Do It! Now, Koko ni Iruzee!)
I'll at least give an explanation for each song on this one, how can you not love it to pieces?
1. 'Intro' Do It! Now has an introduction of about 9 seconds, perhaps an early version, but just a clip.
2. 'Do It! Now', the proper version, perhaps as close to being 'American' in any of their singles, and never again to return. Maybe Tsunku was threatened with physical repercussions if he wrote another apt American hit. Not the strongest MM single by a longshot, but a good way to start the album. Hey Tsunku, can you cover 5 minutes or so with an entertaining song whilst we get the stage ready?
3. 'TOP!' without the roll call would be a good song. But it's got the 'roll call' of every member, and when they were performing, 'TOP!' was an understatement. Check *this* out, indeed!
4. 'Tomodachi ga Ki ni Itteru Otoko Kara no Dengon' Just try to skip this song, just try. Lots of 'HEY' and 'YEAH' to be yelled during this song.
5. 'Koko ni Iruzee' ...and you have no objections to my choice so far.
6. 'Sugoi Nakama' Any guitar player wishes he'd have written this cookin' line. On top of it is an ultra-poppy song which will stick in your head for days.
7. 'Tsuyoki de Yukouze!' Burn the barn *now*, ask the cows about it later.
8. 'Megami ~Mousse na Yasashisa~' The Venus Mousse song, very chill. Take a good 'cool' song, add Mari to the mix, and I'll be loving it from the start.
9. 'Yes! Pocky Girls' Oh no, please don't make me listen to a perky song about a popular candy product! This is totally not what I signed up for... oh wait, it's completely what I'm after. Don't ever listen to anyone who tells you that Morning Musume has sold out, because you can just turn this song on and drown out the obviousness of that statement.
10. 'Hey! Mirai' It's unfair to like a song just because of the video, isn't it? It's a great song, be assured, but the video makes it all the more awesome. Lots of closeup shots, where the girls line up single file, and take turns getting in the camera, literally shoving each other out of the way for their moment. *Love* the part where Mari strikes a pose and grabs her hair in a classic 'sexy beam' way (I'm yours, Mari, take me now!) Also enjoy the puppies they are snuggling, and I don't even like animals that much... which would come as a disappointment to 'dog enthusiast' Ms. Kayo Aiko, I'm aware.
11. 'Ganbacchae!' Not sure who all of the Hello Kids are on this, but despite the fact that this song is kind of monotonous, and also that it sounds like one of our church songs, it's cool to hear an early Berryz/Morning Musume-ish collaboration.
12. 'Sugoku Suki na no ni... ne' Kind of like 'Ganbacchae' without the kids. The instrumentation on this is pretty mesmerizing, synth horns and vocal syllables, and latin percussion and all.
13. 'Sotsugyou Ryokou ~Morning Musume Tabidatsu Hito ni Okuru Uta~' Sure, whatever it's called, it's 'the last song on No.5'. Although it really feels 'same-ish', it's a good way to end the record. And unlike Platinum9, where the only flaw I can find anymore is a decent closing song featuring the current members, this song closes up the record with no strange surprises.

Feel free to rip my choices apart as you see fit. I've gone from ranking my favorite idols to ranking my favorite records. At least I can see a reason to do this, it's a little less subjective. Some of these records are more cohesive than others. After listing No.5 (which is largely a collection of odds-and-ends) as my favorite, it seems that cohesiveness may not be the most potent of album traits, just whether or not there are good songs, and No.5's got that in spades. In fact, they all do, who am I kidding?

65 days, 0 Hours, 36 Minutes

2009-04-27T23:24:00.002-05:00

Just keeping this picture at the top, to keep up the optimism.

SPAM! in the place where you live...

2009-04-27T22:37:00.005-05:00

A little off-topic from the subject of JPop, but I'll share this with you, because it appears to be of the utmost importance.

I don't often get spam (or any other email) in my jyoru1211@gmail.com address, and was surprised to find a message entitled 'Dearest' in my inbox, from someone I don't know and who may well not exist at all. I simply *must* reply to this email with my bank account information and other sensitive data, because I believe every word.

"My dearest," she writes, "I am writing this mail with tears and sadness and pains. I know it will come to you as a suprise since we haven't known or come across each other before, but kindly bear with me at this moment."

-Okay, I'm bearing with you. I am also 'lion-ing' and 'tiger-ing' with you. Here's to hoping that we never 'know' or 'come across' each other, ever.

"I have a special reason why I decided to contact you. My situation at hand is miserable but I trust in God and hope you will be of my help."

-*Not* out of the ordinary. Buy me a beer sometime and I'll tell you how miserable my 'situation at hand' is.

'She' goes on to say that she is the 25-year-old daughter of Ibrahim Baré Maïnassara, the fallen Nigerian president. 'She' includes a link to a BBC story regarding that assassination. 'Her' stepmother was cruel enough to steal away 'her' passport and "other valuable documents" but luckily 'she' was able to hold on to some sensitive information regarding a great amount of 'her' 'father's' capital.

"I am seeking for longterm relationship and investment assistance."

-Listen, lady, no longterm relationship. Friends-with-benefits, maybe. Investment assistance? Gimme all your money.

She proceeds with the unlikely story of needing my bank information to transfer an ungodly sum into my account. Followed by: "Therefore, I decide to seek for your help in transferring the money into your bank account while I will relocate to your country and settle down with you."

-Whoa, stop right there. You are seeking for longterm relationship and you'll settle down with me? Just give me the freakin' money already and forget this other stuff.

"I have my fathers death certificate and the account number which I will give you as soon as you indicated your interest to help me."

-Good to know that a death certificate has an account number. As for indicating my interest, yep, I'm interested, so give me the account number already.

"It is my intention to compensate you with 20% of the total money for your assitance and the balance shall be my investment in any profitable venture which you will recommend to me as have no any idea about foreign investment."

-My 'assitance' is worth more than 20%. It is pretty clear that you have no any idea about foreign investment, or conventions of the English language.

"I will send you my photos in my next email."

-That will assist me in my decision of whether we should have longterm relationship and settle down.

I have no reservations about sending my bank account number, Social Security Number, and measurements to this person. Anybody have any reason why I shouldn't? It sounds so believable...

And furthermore, is anyone out there really dumb enough to believe this shit?

I love Kayo Aiko, with a passion. That is all.

Legendary

2009-04-27T21:29:00.003-05:00

They had it all and they blew it, completely. One got caught smoking, the other one got knocked up. For a mere 630 days or so, these two gals brought the wotas to their knees. For anyone who doesn't already know, this duo was called 'W'.

For a couple of little shits, they had some serious talent. It's hard not to look back at all their television appearances and music videos and see anything other than a couple of rambunctious little girls whose ambitions were to be their downfall.

In Tsuji's defense, she handled her pregnancy/shotgun wedding in the classiest way possible, and up until the graduation of the H!P Elder Club in March, was still a part of the organization.

Kago, my preference of the two, cocked-up royally and has paid a big price for it. She's made her own comeback of sorts, but it just doesn't live up to the hypothetical success she would have been had she stayed on the straight-and-narrow. It's nice to know she's alive and well (and, as expected, looking better by the day) but even if this comes off as harsh: she had TWO chances and she just couldn't cut it.

I've been over it many times in my own mind and as I've said, I'm glad they're doing well; unsurprisingly, I'm really not paying attention to either of them these days. Oh well, we'll still have W.

I don't think W would be quite as impressive, though, if they had stuck with it and were still around today. The fact that they no longer exist as a duo lends some sort of Jim Morrison/Kurt Cobain mystique to the group's works. Yeah, they're not dead, but quite the living example of the old adage 'you can't go home again'. While the girls live on and the image that was captured in that short time may linger on in the memories of fans, the group and its music are now legendary.

So, listening back to those short-lived memories is pleasurable and at the same time very melancholy. Because a lot of the group's music is either ultra-peppy or breathtakingly gorgeous, it's more properly categorized as an experience than just simply music or image.

Bottom line is, whatever they've done since as individuals, the demise of the group has only solidified their place as a force to be reckoned with. Kago and Tsuji just compliment each other, like cheese and wine, Lennon and McCartney, or fire and ice.

The end of W also meant the end of Mini Moni, as that group fell apart and left only these two standing. After which, they grew up at light-speed and left us all behind. Maybe someday they'll get back together and shock the world again, but it probably won't be the same. We've moved on from it out of sheer necessity and can only be left wondering 'what if?'

Does anybody know whether there are any W recordings beyond the two albums and seven singles they released under the group name? I'd like to know that either: my collection is complete, or there's more out there.

Take Your Inspirational Quotes and Stuff 'Em...

2009-04-22T23:31:00.003-05:00

If this doesn't bring you happiness, apparently you are a cold-hearted fool. Sometimes I'm just at a loss for words...

Platinum9DISC recap

2009-04-20T20:55:00.007-05:00

I bought 'Platinum9DISC' from JapanFiles last night and gave it a few whirls in the past day. I know I'm a bit late to the party on this, but seeing as how this was the first Real MM album I was 'present' for, I thought I'd go over the material and make some points for discussion. I've listened to every Morning Musume album, maybe not in that order, specifically, but you'd think I'd know a thing or two about them.

If you're comparison-shopping, consider my favorites, in this order: 5, 2, 3, 7, 4, 1, 7.5, 8, 6.

Where to start? I think that overall this record was exactly what I was expecting. That's not a bad thing, at all. Coming off what I would consider an artistic peak of the 'Cover You' album, it seemed like the group was ready to turn another corner and re-start the original ass-kicking on a whole other level. Well, between listening to this record and getting a chance to see them live in LA this summer, I'm totally back on the Morning Musume boat.

1. SONGS
It takes a bit of time for this song to get off the ground, but once it kicks in, the polyrythm and voice-processing makes a great start to the album. It's almost a shell of a song, in fact, and it seems to be a way of saying 'strap yourself in for the ride'. Lots of synth sounds, very busy, but the tune is simple. I can just use my imagination to see the girls dancing about. I think the polyrhythm at the beginning of each verse is the best part, like, 'you think *you're* cool... well, here we come...'

2. Resonant Blue
I'm an unapologetic supporter of Resonant Blue, it's just an ass-kicker from front to back. The 'uu-ee' part is convincing enough, and the chorus part that begins with 'kanashimi no...' is the hook-from-hell, it just pushes the song into the highest gear possible. The one catch is whether they're saying 'happy' or 'help me' at the high point (it's 'help me', btw), so don't get too confused, it's not a happy song. Still, it's groovin'.

3. Ame no Furanai Hoshi de wa Aisenai darou?
I won't even try to give a translation, but something to do with love, the stars, and the rain not falling. The obligatory slow song from the first half of the album, it sounds hopeful. Though it may never top Aya's 'THE LAST NIGHT' or Berryz' 'BE' (good luck with *that*), it's enjoyable, and has a nice buildup. One of those songs that starts nice and quiet and before you know it you're going deaf, but all that does is make you turn it up all the more. I really like the addition of some Chinese words, so thanks, Chinese chicks, for taking it to the next level. Something 'THE LAST NIGHT' and 'BE' can't boast.

4. Take off is now!
Oh people, please listen to others online when it comes to good songs. I put this on repeat about five times this morning, trust me, everyone who says this song is good, they're right, completely. Tastefully executed; busy, yet consistent. Combining rock and heavy dance sounds, this song just WINS. I really hope this becomes a staple of the live show, as I would love to see them sing it in person, and they'd better bring dozens of colored strobes to accompany them. My only gripe on this song is that the 'outro' is much too short, it could really go on for about twenty more minutes before I got tired of it. Please please please, bring this song to the LA show, and make it so that the outro lasts about ten minutes while y'all get your freak on. I will still demand more, but it's a start.

5. Naichau Kamo
I will forever call this song 'Nacho Spider' but I really think it's cool. The video is okay, if you like watching girls cry; I'm sure that some misogynist is watching it non-stop right now. When they're not fake-crying, they look incredible, moreso than usual. But let's not let the video taint our impressions of this song. More hyper-dance from the group that does it so well, and even a part at the end of each chorus for idiots like me to recite 'naichau kamo kamo kamo kamo' with veracity, after the actual song has passed me by at a frightening pace. Not a big first-impression song, but this one will probably grow on listeners.

6. Watashi no Miryoku ni Kidzukanai Donkan'na Hito
I'm totally cool with Aika Mitsui getting her own song. How fitting for a 'turn the corner' album to feature Mitsui as the first solo song? Sounds a lot like most of the other songs on the record, hyper-synth-pop and all; at worst, a forgettable song, but it's not like she's not trying. I liked Mitsui before and in my future bleak days, will turn this on as a testament to individual accomplishment. More power to you, Mitsui. I'm the biggest reluctant fan you'll ever have.

7. Guruguru JUMP
Kusumi+Chinese Chicks=I'm digging it already. Is it upbeat? Another plus. Short sentences? Lots of 'em. Somebody should tell Kusumi that peppy songs are her forte. Yeah, there was hyper-beat on the previous songs, but let's step it up a bit. I don't have any words of wisdom here... either you like 'shopping spree' music or you don't. And if you don't, back the heck off of Kusumi, for crying out loud. She's seen several doctors to try and get that star-shaped tambourine out of her hand, there's just no cure, except for time itself.

8. Mikan
This is the song I'm hooked on, right now. When it came out I could have swore I've heard it before, but blame it on my love of Kusumi. This song is a total Koha-fix, top to bottom. No, let's make it catchier! Like Resonant Blue, the buildup to the chorus is worth it, and when it gets to the chorus, there's that extra push. I know no heavy metal song that kicks more ass, seriously. Be prepared to yell 'Oh yeah, one time!' when you get a chance. Oh, yeah.

9. Jounetsu no Kissu wo Hitotsu
The obligatory slow song for the back half of the album, featuring the same trio of singers from 'Take off is now!'. Of course, the second side always makes the slow song a bit more forceful. 'Dokusenyoku' from the 6th album might be an okay comparison, but 'Dokusenyoku' will always be better. Another stereo-buster, indeed, but just not as good; admittedly, it's a high bar to jump. The ending is abrupt and strange. I would hope for a better farewell from Niigaki, Takahashi, and Reina, so look for it in the future, if they ever decide to leave. Let's hope they don't, they're making some good music.

10. It's You
Who decided that a solo Sayu song was the way to go? I just wanna say thanks to that person. This song really does stand out on the album, and by comparison, (Berryz') Risako's 'REAL LOVE' seems flat and unexpressive, so that says something. Sayu's fans (and they're innumerable) are overwhelmed by this song. 'Hey you...' She's talking to ME! The sound of glass breaking at the climax of the song is one of the best touches UFA has put on one of the best songs I've heard in a while.

11. Onna ni Sachi Are
WARNING; if you should watch this video, each and every one of the girls will call you an idiot before it's over. Just take it in stride. I don't think I've mentioned hyper-dance in this post until now, but if you like that sort of thing, this is the group for you. This song does its job as the introduction to the current lineup of Musume. If you've listened this far and still need convincing, just turn it off and go back to your normal life. Otherwise, its placement here is just preaching to the choir. If we could just... get... to our... utility belt...

12. Kataomoi no Owari ni
Second to last song, better drink it in. Kamei Eri's chance to shine, and shine she does. Along the lines of the Mitsui song, it may not be your favorite, even if you're an Eri fan. Oh, who am I kidding, take it Eri! What more can I say? This song is representative of her personality and style on every level. Take it or leave it.

13. Kanashimi Twilight
A great song, no doubt, but I might be the only one who finds Fujimoto's voice a little out of place at this point. She's been gone for a while now, no shock to my readers, and suddenly she's on (and only on) the last track? Tsunku, you lazy so-and-so, please come up with a better ending than this. Keep this song where it is, fine... just give me some closure on this album. Again, not a bad song to close with, but if your thrust at this point is the future of this group (and it should be), less Yossie, and less Fujimoto on the last song. I suppose we'll wait another two years for #10, and it better be more cohesive than this.

So, overall, I will be listening to the album on a regular basis, because I want to get a feel for how terrible it is....

Random Facts and Observations

2009-04-17T13:47:00.007-05:00

I just want that picture of Aiko to be at the top, so there she is, in LA.

What do you think Brian Wilson meant when he sang, "I wish they all could be California Girls"? I used to think that he wanted to give some superiority to the girls from California, like they were so much better than anything the world had to offer. And now, with an adult mindset, I'm thinking he was just wanting a girl of every type to choose from, right in his hometown; living there, as opposed to being from there. Kayo Aiko could be a California girl, she'd just have to move to California; then it's up to Brian to sort her out from all the rest.

Apparently, piracy isn't all that rampant on the internet. I've had my song previews up for almost two weeks, and nobody's really taken advantage of them, yet. Steal something, for crying out loud!

'Joshi Kashimasi Monogatari' means 'Noisy Girls' Story'. I call it 'The Kashimashi Song' so that means it's the 'noisy' song. Therefore, it can't be 'The Kashimashi Song' unless it is turned up so loud that it makes you bleed internally. At least, that's the logic I follow.

'Kakegoe' is a Japanese word which can be translated into 'a voice for decoration', and Wikipedia explains the similarities I've heard in more than a couple Tsunku-written songs. Things like 'sore sore sore sore!' and 'ha iya sasa'. This is a list of songs which incorporate similar lyrics, inspired by folk tradition and festival atmospheres:
-Tomodachi wa Imasu ka? - Sharam Q ('sore sore' and 'iya sasa')
-Sukiyaki - Morning Musume 6th album ('ha iya', etc.)
-Piriri to Ikou - Berryz Kobo 3rd single ('ha iya, etc')
-Koi no Dance Site - Morning Musume 8th single ('sore sore')
-Shiawase Kyouryuu Ondo - Odoru11 ('Do don ga don')
-Do Don Ga Don Ondo - °C-ute (see song title, etc.)
-Dancing! Natsu Matsuri! - 10nin Matsuri ('dokoisho dokoisho')
-Tan Tan Taan! - MilkyWay ('Dontokoi!')
There's probably more, but this should serve to illustrate what I'm talking about. See also 'kuchi shoga' regarding drum emulation.

Going to California, Sans Heartache

2009-04-14T18:55:00.018-05:00

No one should ever go so far as to call me a spontaneous person. I mainly just mind my own business and stick it out day after day, year after year, feeling as-stuck-in-the-midwest as anyone can feel. But my mood took a dramatic upswing in the last few days for very obvious reasons. Suddenly I have an urge to listen to every song ever written about California or Los Angeles, knowing that soon, real soon, I'll be seeing it with my own eyes.

Years ago, as a young rock-star-wannabe, I would stare at maps of Los Angeles for hours, trying to get a feel for how the town spreads out. I would imagine where my future home would be, possibly tucked somewhere in the Hollywood Hills with plenty of parking available to models, other rock stars, millionaires, and party-crashers. Also, I often dreamed of up-and-driving-there without notice to start a new life, because as pathetic as it may have turned out, I would have at least *tried* to bring change upon myself. Those plans were at best unrealistic, and at worst really stupid.

I've been told many stories about Los Angeles; most of them are unflattering, I hate to say. I'm not sure if one of the best stories I've been told is true, but it's probably very likely, and a good story nonetheless.

When a group of guys were trying to 'make it' as a big rock band in the 80's, their car (the only car any of the musicians had) was stolen. Some days later, they found the car in a driveway not more than a couple of blocks away. Whoever had stolen the car had not changed the locks or the ignition key; so, having the key, the rightful owner got in and drove it home, only to find that a *wonderful* stereo system had been installed in the days it'd been gone. There was really no recourse for the thief in a situation like that, so the hero of our story was blessed with a great new stereo and the car wasn't any worse for the wear. If it didn't really happen to them, I'm quite sure this has been done in LA several times at some point.

People have asked me why I would want to live in Los Angeles, and in truth, I haven't wanted to in quite a while. But there's just so much happening there, I'm sure that when I get back I'll be a little more comfortable on the city bus, laughing at the one horse we own, and feeling a bit more well-travelled than if I just stayed home and persisted in the mundane. Los Angeles is, after all, the second-largest city in the US; California is the most-populated and easily-most-eccentric place we've got, and I've never been there. I may never go back, who knows, but I will unlikely be unable to forget what it's like.

Still, I'd like to think of myself as well-travelled, regionally, anyway. I've been to Chicago several times and had the *privilege* of driving through it to a destination near Wrigley Field twice. I'd taken the 'L' a few times with a friend who lives there, but on my last visit, took it alone for the first time, downtown, where it becomes a subway. On the outside I tried to pretend that I'd done it so many times before, tried to give off the impression that if I could somehow get away from the daily grind of Chicago and get off this god-forsaken train that I had apparently known since birth, I would. On the inside, though, I felt like a real farm-boy, though I haven't spent very much time in the rural areas, but nonetheless really nervous about taking the train by myself for the first time. I lived to tell the tale.

So what happened to me? Suddenly, without a lot of warning, I have agreed to spend a week in downtown Los Angeles, and it'll be worth it.

I still want to go to Japan, and still plan to do so, but this was too good of an opportunity to pass up. Now, the reason I got into Japan and the culture wasn't the culture itself, but the people. And to be more specific, it was certain people; idols, to be exact.

If I were to go to Japan, attending a concert would probably be very unlikely, almost an afterthought. So much time would be spent planning hotels and destinations, vacation time, money, and being able to read the signs, etc. It would be very obvious that I was not from around there, and if I managed to find a good record store, I'd be doing good. What are the odds that if I *did* go to Japan I'd manage to see any of the people who are responsible for my current obsession?

That all changed with the possibility of seeing Morning Musume perform at Anime Expo in Los Angeles this summer. See details here, and go mad with jealousy at my comparative good luck. Let me wallow in this for a while, because I don't get out often. And on the other hand, I'm still not believing that this is actually going to happen.

I harbor a little bit of dissapointment that I won't be seeing °C-ute or Berryz Kobo, though if I'd seen them a little over a year ago, wouldn't have been star-struck anyway. Morning Musume may have already reached its peak some time ago, and some of the most popular girls won't be there, but still, let's stop and think about who I'll be in the same room with.

For starters, no, it's not Aiko; but at least two of them have definitely spoken to her, and shared some time backstage (or possibly the same bunk bed) with her during the Musume audition.

Let's see who I'll be seeing with my own two eyes. A member of MiniMoni, albeit a latecomer, Ms. Takahashi Ai, and fellow 5th gen-er Niigaki Risa. Both of these girls are hilariously gorgeous, have talked to Aiko at some point, were around back when 'Mr. Moonlight' came out, and by my calculations, hold the title for being in Morning Musume longer than anyone else in history.

Next, the 6th gen of Kamei Eri, Michishige Sayumi, and Tanaka Reina, all swimsuit models in a former life, apparently:

'Nuff said.

And, if that weren't enough, the almighty Ms. Kusumi Koharu will be there; so Rainbow Pink, (my favorite super-group) will be reunited, so to speak, with a surrounding ensemble. Plus, have I ever mentioned that I really like Koha-chan?

Mitsui Aika, the sole Japanese rep of the 8th gen, will be there. As much as I tried to ignore her, seriously, tenacity is one of her better qualities, and if she encountered me alone on the street, proclaiming that she was a Musume, I'd stop her in the middle of her spiel. "You're friggin' Mitsui!" I would exclaim, and then we would go back to my castle and live happily ever after.

Here's the hard part. The other two 8th gen-ers Junjun and Linlin will also be there, but for the life of me, I can't tell them apart. Blame it on me being racist and having a bit of trouble accepting Chinese girls into my favorite Japanese group. Or, blame it on me looking the other way when they joined, and just generally not keeping up with Morning Musume in recent days. Either way, a *lot* of good things have been said about these two, and I usually listen to my online peers when it comes to talent. I just haven't seen much of them, and unlike, say, Yuko and Rika, there's not a big age/personality difference for me to latch on to. I can't tell any other two Asian girls apart, so don't get too offended, I'm just an idiot about these things.

So, my goal in life is to see me some idols, and this is quite the collection. No need to get a passport and the flight itself is about 1/6th the amount I'd be paying to get to Japan, no idol-seeing included. Add to that the fact that I'll be amongst friends unknown, Japanophiles all. I'm not a huge anime fan, but there'll be plenty of cool (and cutting edge) things to see there.

Consider this to be another notch scratched on my belt. Been to California, been to LA, and if things hold out, I'd have stayed but a block away from Library Tower. It's still partially up in the air, but in all actuality, I have a plane ticket to Los Angeles and admission to the Expo gate. So it's as if I've already been there, short of telling Kusumi (to her face) that I love her. Did I mention that I really like Kusumi Koharu?

Things that Tick Me Off, Smugness, and the Best GD Record Ever Made

2009-04-09T20:56:00.002-05:00

Well, I hope I don't come off too snotty with this post, so I'll try and keep it lighthearted and funny, and hopefully somebody agrees with me on some things. As this is my own forum, my own pink soapbox, where I call the shots, here goes. Don't be afraid to engage me in a debate on something; I try to keep an open mind and I don't like all the Internet-hate that tends to go around. We cool, just remember that.

Things that Tick Me Off

1. Comments (usually on youTube) where the commenter clearly hasn't spent even two seconds reading through the 10,000 previous comments that both answered their question and should have put the issue to rest.
You know what I'm talking about, random fan-vid, same thing over and over... "Q: That's a great song, who is this?" "A: It's Tom Petty." "Q: Who sings this song?" "A: Tom Petty." "Q: Wow, wish I knew who sang this song, who is it?" "A: Read the description, it's Tom Petty." "Q: Anyone know who this song is by?" "A: FOR ALL THE FIVE-YEAR-OLDS WHO CAN BUILD A TIME MACHINE BUT CAN'T READ COMMENTS, THE SONG IS BY BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN!" "A: That doesn't sound like Bruce Springsteen, who is this?"

Dammit! Is your blood boiling yet? Comments that are relative are great, and often fun to read, but this, seriously, has got to stop. This is ridiculous. Half of all the information on the internet has got to be ignorant questions that have already been asked. I'm exaggerating, slightly, because most of the exchanges like the one above have some severe misspellings.

2. Comments that begin with "I'm a professional writer..." and about three words after that, it's clear that this person should *not* be allowed near a computer.
It's never good to appear snobbish so early on in your comment, then lose any dignity you might have had if you just left out that one crucial detail. A professional writer might have some good skills, like usage, punctuation, spelling, and the ability to research, just a little bit. "I'm a professional writer, and we's gotsta gets uss sum morales. I'm so tierd of..." I put a shirt on one time, and somebody looked at me, so I suppose I can call myself a model. Come on.

3. Any comment (usually of a political nature) that begins with "OPEN YOUR EYES PEOPLE" or, somewhere uses the word "sheeple".
They're not going to open their eyes. 'Sheeple' is apt about once every ten years. And we're all porfessional wirters.

4. People who post romanizations or translations (or both) then boldy state that if you repost, CREDIT ME.
Okay, now I'm getting back to the issue at hand. I'll give credit where it's due, no problem; thanks to JimBob for the translation, I can dig that. But if your precious time is so valuable, then do the work, translate the song/show, and then keep it for yourself, if you're just in it for the satisfaction. People know no bounds anyway; a quick copy/paste, and it's been lifted, end of story. Often, there might even be no malicious intent, but if they fail to give you credit, what's the deal? You neither invented the English or Japanese language, and you didn't write the song or script. Really, the finished product is enough to be satisfied with, unless you just NEED to have throngs of admirers, in which case, yay for you, you did it! Now go in the room with all the anonymous people who've done thankless work, whose names have been lost to history. The Bible would be twice as thick if they'd spent enough time thanking the translators. My concern lies with crediting the songwriters/screenwriters who both created the work out of thin air or solid inspiration, and who actually own the rights to the original work. It's not only good karma, but for those who might be searching for a similar work will benefit as well. So there, on to...

Smugness
I can't help but feel a little more worldly than some of my contemporaries for listening to foreign music, along with plenty of American selections. But let's not get out of hand. Some of the music you love so much (hey there, Tsunku!) might be viewed by anyone, including the Japanese, as the 'same old crap they always do', so don't kiss your own ass too much. In the sixties, when sitar music was just coming into Western vogue, there had to have been a few people thinking, 'The fuckin' sitar? Again?' What sounds exotic to you is normal for some people. What sounds normal to you is exotic to some other people. Madonna, Mr. Kenny Chesney, and Britney are all being clamored for *as we speak* in foreign countries, because they just love how fresh it all sounds compared to their normal fare. I could care more about these artists, admittedly, but listening to the new Tanaka Reina song on repeat (Really? When's that coming out?) does *not* put you in a category above the rest of the music-listening world. It just means that's what you're into. Still, there is that possibility that you're listening to something so untouchable, so expressive, that you may in fact be touching God himself, in terms of worldliness. Which brings me to:

The Best GD Record Ever Made
...and I pity anyone who doesn't know about it or hasn't heard it by now. You've had plenty of time, OPEN YOUR EYES PEOPLE. Capsule's 'More! More! More!' is, to me, as note-perfect as any record ever will be. And you're still stuck on Led Zeppelin, you fool. I'll go so far as to say I will refund your $10 (you're up a penny, even) if you download this record from iTunes and it doesn't seriously, unapologetically, change your mind about the way music *should be*. You may have heard techno, you may even have heard Jpop, but you've never heard such a successful marriage of the two until you've lost some hearing in both ears from testing your stereo with this gem. As a lover of Pink Floyd's even-most-trite sound experiments, I say with no hesitation that when the smoke clears, and after you pick up all those pieces of speaker that have been blown across your home/car, when the record's over, you'll want to hear it again. And again, and again. "Q: That's a real good album, who's it by?"

Check out some Girl's Box music

2009-04-05T18:20:00.014-05:00

In my post titled "Finding more Aiko..." I threatened to make the a☆girls song 'Tsuioku no Heroine' available for preview, so I've done myself one better and am making a number of Girls Box songs available.

Each song I've uploaded has three things in common: first, I enjoy these songs and think that some of you will enjoy them as well. Second, I'm not aware that any of these songs are widely available on the 'net, if you can even find a portion of them anywhere else. And third, each song has been modified so that you get most (but not all) of the song here; just enough to make you think that if only you had that extra minute or so, including the brilliant ending, your life would somehow be complete.

I'm not trying to encourage piracy, I just think you'll like them enough to search for them legitimately at some point. I'm just tired of shopping for music where you are *lucky* if you get titles, or any correct information at all. I'm also displeased with 30-second soundbytes that don't really give you any idea of the scope of the composition. I don't own the rights to any of this, and I'm not representing any company in doing this. Just getting it out there so that maybe someone else will pick up on it. I know Avex wants to sell this, and I know the retailers want to sell this. If you haven't heard these before (or, like me, you may be on the fence about some things), this will give you the chance to hear this music for what it really is. And really, what it is, is... awfully good. I've provided links to the albums at cdjapan, but now that you know what you're looking for, feel free to buy them anywhere.

So, if you're still with me, here's what I've got:

Girls Box ~Best Hits Compilation Winter~
(also available as CD-only)
There are 11 songs on this disc, and I am providing previews for:
Track 3: Hiroko Sato: "Can't Hide"
Track 5: a☆girls: "Tsuioku no Heroine
Track 8: Nanase Hoshii: "Fuyu no Opera Glass"
Track 9: Saito Michi: "Tooi Machi no Dokoka de"

Girls Box LOVERS HIGH Original Song Collection
(also available as CD-only)
There are 6 songs on this disc, and I am providing previews for:
Track 2: Nagasawa Nao: "To you"
Track 3: Kayo Aiko: "Runaway girl"
Track 4: Nanase Hoshii: "Dawn is standing on my back"
Track 5: Saito Michi: "HOLD ON"

Right, here is the collection for download at Mediafire. Please feel free to leave a comment or email me (see profile-->) with your thoughts.

Monday morning blue romaji/transation

2009-04-05T13:54:00.005-05:00

Another reasonably credible translation by me. Started this a while ago and figured I'd better just get it out here. If anyone wants the source (Japanese) text to have a crack at it, mail me.

Interesting sidenote: Hiroshi Matsui is also featured on Morning Musume's 'Egao YES Nude' as the programmer and keyboardist.

As always, public domain unless it can't be. Reposting? Include the songwriter credits, please.

'Monday morning blue'
as sung by Kayo Aiko
and performed by Hiroshi Matsui and his ROYAL MIRRORBALL ORCHESTRA

Lyrics: Kenn Kato
Music: Schroeder
Arrangement: YAS KITAJIMA

True yuutsu na no Monday (True, gloomy Monday)
Blue norikoete Tuesday (Blue, climbing over Tuesday)
itsu mo yubiorikazoete machinozomu (always counting on my fingers, waiting anxiously)
shuumatsu no yotei omoi ukabete (weekend plans i am reminded of)

Wednesday ketarui no Thursday (Wednesday, listless Thursday)
Through kutabirete Friday (through a worn-out Friday)
na no ni kono hi ni naru to Why? (but then, when it comes to today, why?)
dare mo minna egao ni afureteru (everyone overflows with smiles)

17:00(Five) tokei mitsumete (5:00 PM, the clock says)
kokoro koko ni naku (my heart is crying here)
naru kane ni tobidasu (the sound of a bell suddenly appears)
sorezore no jiyuu he (everyone's freedom)

You anata no matsu basho he (you wait in that place)
hayaru kimochi osae nagara (while good feelings surpress impatience)
Downtown no nigiwau toori wo (going through a downtown crowded with people)
isogiashi te kakeru (going at a fast pace)

Someday dekiru ka na Boy friend (someday will there be a boyfriend?)
Dreaming barairo no Weekend (dreaming of a rose-colored weekend)
doko ni iru no (when will that be?)
unmei no sono hito wa (this person's fate)
tameiki ga koboreru (a sigh falls out)

You itsu ka deaeru hazu (you, someday an encounter might happen)
keredo kitai wa karamawari (but hoping is pointless)
Downtown ni soredemo kuridasu (in downtown, regardless i send out)
yokan ga shiteru kara (premonition that it's happening)

You anata no matsu basho he (you wait in that place)
hayaru kimochi osae kirezu (while good feelings won't reach you)
Downtown de te wo furu shuumatsu (downtown waving hand to the weekend)

Yume miru Monday morning blue (dreaming of Monday morning blue)

Kayo Aiko vs. Giant Jenga

2009-04-05T13:34:00.012-05:00

This is here mostly for the sheer WTF? factor... my estimates say this show was done about summer 2005.

1.) Regular-size Jenga:

2.) This is gonna get wacky:

3.) Don't ask me who that guy is, all dressed up for television...

4.) Aiko's amazing balloon-piercing magic trick (with same mystery-man/lovely assistant in the background):

5.) You know that removing the outside blocks really weakens the structure:

6.) Apparently she didn't get killed by those blocks falling on her. No good moves left, really:

This is a nightmare come to life. I like Jenga, I just don't want to play with a set that might crush me.

Anybody got more info on this... what show it is, perhaps?

The Hello!Blog poll, 2009, results explained.

2009-04-03T17:04:00.016-05:00

I figured I'd do the polite thing and complete Tom's little challenge to select my top ten members of H!P. He's gotten a lot of responses so far and you have until April 10 to get your say, if you haven't already.

I started doing this, not really sure of what I was doing and just stared at all my options until I came up with a lineup that I'm very proud of, so I thought I'd explain why I put them in this order. This actually turned out to be pretty fun, I may become an idol-ranker in the future despite my pride.

First, honorable mention goes to Kayo Aiko. It's a cop-out, admittedly, but if it weren't for her, I wouldn't know who any of these girls are. Insofar as this site is all about her, it stands to reason that she is my 'real' first choice and nothing I've seen in the past three years has even threatened her reign at the top of my list. Not to say that I don't enjoy anything as much, just... Aiko, is all. For what it's worth, she would have done a great job with H!P and this is one of the few Tsunku moves I disagree with.

1. Kusumi Koharu, undeniably. I love girls who are very pretty and who act crazy most of the time, go figure. Aside from juicing up the 'Cover You' record with songs like 'Six seven oh oh!' and 'Pin Pon ...IKOU KA!?!?!?', she's got a presence on every song she's ever done, be it solo, or when she teams up with Sayu or Hagitty or MilkyWay, etc. Having first noticed her in the vid for 'Egao YES Nude' I've been paying attention for a while, and *some*body looks damn good in the 'Naichau Kamo' (Nacho Spider) vid. Songs like 'Happy Sunday' really keep me going, and there's plenty of good stuff on her latest record; did I mention she makes dog noises? Oh, so cute... Seriously, this woman is saving my life right now; when things are going wrong I hear her screaming like a crazy person and I just get the giggles. Thanks, Koha; you win this one easily.

2. Tsugunaga Momoko, or just plain Momoko, because this chick is just unique, there's nobody else like her. She's quickly gone from being the most annoying Berry (in my past opinions) to being the best. Perseverance pays, and she's always there, constantly reminding you that she's not going away, and you're just going to have to deal with it. I now have a pretty good knowledge of the group, but from that first day I could tell Momoko's voice from the rest. Perky, powerful Momoko, redefining the exceptional idol, gets hit by a bus and just keeps going. Wins a motorcycle race on a tricycle. Sorry, y'all, take a backseat. I shouldn't even *have* to explain this.

3. Hagiwara Mai, mostly to illustrate the order of my three favorite groups. Still, she's on a Koha record, which is as close as one gets to being a god in my book. Gets to rock the song 'Disco Queen' with Tom's favorite, Nakki. Appears on Morning Musume's 7.5 Fuyu Mini record with lines such as (and I'm loosely translating) 'Shut up or I'll kill you, Mikitty...' To which, Miki retorts, 'Stuff a sock in it, Hagitty...' She wears those 'flying ace' sunglasses in the 'Massara Blue Jeans' vid, and the list goes on. I might not say she's the best in °C-ute but she's my favorite to see, hopefully plenty more good things to come with her.

4. Michishige Sayumi, the other half of Rainbow Pink, or whatever the hell they call that duo that sings about pink Christmases and pink rainbows. After my first listen to 'Rainbow Pink' I couldn't believe what I just heard, it sounded like it was written by aliens. I think now that v-u-den and W are gone, this sickeningly sweet duo needs to get an album, one that turns anyone into a diabetic after listening to it all the way through. Anyway, Sayu's schtick about being the cutest in Momusu (and knowing it) has worn thin with a lot of people, but I've always enjoyed it. She's not wrong, I'll let you know, and aside from being obnoxiously cute, she's obnoxiously DEADLY in a swimsuit, hot damn! Go ahead, do a Google image search for some pics, and in three days, when you're done staring at that, this will still be here. Yes, she works out.

5. Tokunaga Chinami, are you seeing a pattern in my group selection, here? Being pulled from obscurity and winning the second Berryz slot takes some serious doing, and Chinami's been working it like crazy lately, flashing those hi-beams (her *eyes*, you pervs), and just generally being outgoing, fun to watch, and surprisingly down-to-earth as well. I've been told that we get to see a glimpse of her in a swimsuit towards this summer, so be on the lookout. Also, anyone who screams 'Everybody BANZAI!' gets high ranks from me. She's got Tom's vote, too.

6. Suzuki Airi, who really needs no boost from me to get a good spot in the overall poll, but let's count the ways. Cute, done. Sings 'Tsuugaku Vector', need I say more? Also, an outstanding job done on the Aa! single 'First Kiss' at the age of *9*! She ain't 'front and center' in °C-ute for no good reason, so you should totally be expecting her to keep owning as she gets older. Another choice that I shouldn't have to explain. Also, Buono!, so there. There's no comeback for that.

7. Kamei Eri, again, mostly for the latest swimsuit pics. Wins my ranking overall as a complete person; as an idol, she's got a little work to do, but no worries. To aid the police in the future, I'm publicly admitting here that if I ever see her in person, I'm going to steal her without regard to the law. There's no talking me out of it, I'm afraid, and as her captor, will take her to every clothing store in town and demand that she try everything on and show me how it looks, even tuxedos and old lady shawls, and (heart skips a beat here) pj's. Afterwards, take her to the best restaurant in town so they can say, 'I'm sorry, we can't serve you, your girlfriend is too hot and she'll cause all the steaks to be overcooked.' She'll kill all the lobsters in the tank after the water starts boiling, just standing there waiting for an open table.

8. and 9. Natsuyaki Miyabi and Sugaya Risako (almost a tie). The (not-so-aptly-named) 'gruesome twosome' who front the Berryz get punitive spots all the way down here, past the Momoko's and Chinami's who are actually singing for their supper. Yeah, they're still godawfully gorgeous, they've still got my eyes turned toward them no matter what, and we've got another member of Buono! (no comeback, see?) and as well, Risako just KILLS the speakers on 'Real Love' any day of the week. But my reasoning for putting them down here is this: girls, don't get egotistical and lazy, or else you'll be out of the top ten entirely. Keep kicking ass and maybe next year you'll do better with me. Even though everybody loves you gals, there's really no comfortable amount of breathing room here, ya can't slack off for a second or Chinami will have your head, for breakfast.

10. Ishikawa Rika, as in, currently, out of the rest of the group, the one I like the most. V-u-den, Hangry and Angry, Gatas, 4th gen Momusu, et al. A native of Kanagawa, where the prettiest girls in the world are manufactured (right, Aiko?) See, Rika was once a little girl like the rest of my votes here, then she was the *leader* of v-u-den, as in, people are telling Yui and Erika to get out of the way so they can get a glimpse of Rika, that's saying something. So now, she pretty much owns the world, I think. She came over the other day and told me to get out of my own house so she could have her ten boyfriends over, and I checked the law, I had to let her do it. Bonus point for her having a sense of humor where everything she says is completely *not* funny, but I can't help but laugh uncontrollably when she just stares at whoever she's told the 'joke' to, like, 'isn't that hilarious?!?' It's not, but if she could get any cuter, I'll be stealing her, too.

Not being in the top ten doesn't mean I don't like whoever I've left out; I could only pick so many, you know. Some of them, though, I have no idea who they are... Shugo? You can't *eat* that. Manoeri... who the hell is that? She must've been stuck in someone's chimney and they felt sorry for her and let her do a couple singles. And seriously, I'm not learning the names of all the Gatas, that's going too far. And I hope Yoshi takes top prize, honestly.

So there you have it, I can't wait for next year. Tom, if you're reading this, I can hear your maniacal laughter at me for going on and on and on about who's my favorite and why. Ah, I have done 'that which I vowed I would never do'. Pray for me.

Thanks be to Tom for getting this done and making us feel like we have *some* say in our favorite groups. You get bonus brag points for converting me from someone who used to laugh at your long-winded 'favorite' posts into someone who also does long-winded 'favorite' posts.

Now, go and vote, dammit!

Obligatory March post: I still love Slayer...

2009-03-30T20:09:00.008-05:00

Aiko continues her journey through life, food, friends, and backstage areas at her blog. Nothing terribly exciting going on with her, really; she helped celebrate Saito Michi's 24th birthday about a week ago, and took a few pictures with the rest of Kingyo, which is cool, because Aiko totally hangs out with that chick from 'dream'.

Going on two years with no solo single release, I've been wondering whether we'll ever see another one. As long as she keeps posting, we'll at least know where she is and that she's doing okay... No posts yet about moving back in with the folks, so more power to her, I just miss the music, is all. It was lots of fun while it lasted.

Still loving all sorts of Japanese (and other Asian countries') music, three years after discovering it. Almost shed a few tears over a Mini Moni song this morning, in fact. Doesn't mean I've forgotten my roots. Today at work I listened to a C-ute record, then a Slayer record, then an SNSD record, then a Pantera record, then a Berryz Kobo record. And I loved every minuted of it. And yes, I alternated genres on purpose.

Just because I love things like Aiko and Koha doesn't mean I've lost any love for good hard rock n' roll. I thought that Guns N' Roses newest album 'Chinese Democracy' was a tour de force, though many people disagree, and that's okay, so long as someone's paying attention. I even think there's a lot to be taken from Metallica's latest, 'Death Magnetic', though my love for that band has waned in the past few years.

Still got all my bases covered, musically, and I haven't taken on one genre to spite the other. I love Mini Moni, and I love Slayer. Darn it, but I do love Slayer...

Another wota blogger has informed me (and the rest of the world) that his efforts have actually been seen by the management that runs his favorite Japanese-girl talent agency. This only renews my hope that in time, I may actually be able to contact Ms. Kayo Aiko (through the proper channels) and someday get her seal of approval for my work here. Only time will tell.

All I know is, I've been lazy about this site for the last six weeks or so. I've still got to get through six more single re-caps, translate every song she's ever done, minus four, into English (for those who enjoy that sort of thing), and possibly discover some gems from the past that are rarely discussed online. Oh, and get my Saito Michi site up, too, maybe.

Like always, promises, promises... but it'll happen, just believe. There are plenty of Aiko fans out there, I know for a fact, and they'll either contribute to or take enjoyment from this site as it just keeps getting bigger and bigger and bigger.

P.S. According to these ears, 'W's 'Arrivederci' features a guitar solo from a real, unplugged, actual acoustic steel-string guitar, unlike most recordings, which would normally go with a piezo pickup for ease-of-use over reality. What a nice touch.

Finding More Aiko, You Can't Always Trust the Internet, and Some Ground Rules

2009-02-18T21:23:00.003-06:00

My latest cdjapan purchase was a treasure hunt of sorts. My first selection was 'GIRLS BOX ~Best Hits Compilation Winter~. While most of these GIRLS BOX compilation cd's include Aiko songs, they are usually singles you can find elsewhere. Aiko fans, take note: this cd contains a song of hers that you're not likely to have, or find on the internet.

In 2005, before there was Kingyo, there was "a☆girls", a duo consisting of Pretty Ami and Aiko Kayo. Though I'm not sure what they did otherwise, the song "Tsuioku no Heroine" is included on this compilation. Any Aiko completist needs this song in his or her collection. The song is in a style that I'd term 'hard disco', similar to Aiko's 'Fantasy' with a little more variance and more sound effects, plus a few polyrythms. In typical Aiko style, it's upbeat and catchy, slightly aggressive, but with an underlying coolness that shines through.

In the future I might make a lo-Q version of this song available, to drum up some advertisement for this album. You'd want this song if you could hear it.

If this were the only reason I'd purchased this disc, it'd been worth it; but there are a few more bonuses for the Aiko fans. A long version of '3rd Xmas' (now with more 'yeah yeah yeah sha-la-la-ding-dongs!), and that song's PV (which I don't think you can get elsewhere), with clips from the Girl's Box Xmas TV series.

Also, a live clip of 'Futari no Ai Land', sung by a stage filled with every Japanese girl that ever lived.

Standing next to Aiko during 'Futari no Ai Land' is the incomparable Saito Michi. Feels nice to know that Saito is Aiko's partner in crime for this song. Plus, she gets her own song on the album, 'Tooi Machi no Dokoka de...', a Christmas song, a very good song. I'm slowly becoming a huge Mi-chan fan, the more I hear of her.

Also among the millions on that stage, front and center is Nanase Hoshii. She also gets a song on the album, one I didn't have before, 'Fuyu no Opera Glass'. It's another Nacchan song which (again, dammit) defies description. There's mellotron, referee whistles, old-Pink-Floyd style electric organ, flange guitar, and a sitar.

Prepare yourself as well for a song sung by Hiroko Sato, labelled a 'newcomer' here. She's a ridiculously gorgeous model with a surprisingly average voice. She's a model, after all, and unfortunately, hasn't done much with music before or since, perhaps something a little more suited to her voice.

The other item in my purchase was, unfortunately, Aiko-free. I've seen titles of a couple songs Aiko had sung for anime, prior to her first single, and was hoping to unearth one to prove that it really did exist. Those songs are 'ABC no Kodomotachi' and 'Midnight Horror School', and so I bit the bullet to try for the latter. The first installment of Midnight Horror School looks like this:

My sources had listed 'Midnight Horror School' as the 'first' theme song for this anime. There's another theme, 'Happy Mystery', credited as the 'second' theme song. Sounds logical, then, to get the first few episodes to find my Aiko song. Mission failed, however. 'Happy Mystery' is the theme for the first four episodes, and I know that for a fact. The song was done by Kawakami Tomoko, not Kayo Aiko. So if Aiko did do 'Midnight Horror School' the song is not the 'first' theme song, if your method is chronological order.

There are 13 of these MHS collections, each priced a little over $40 each, so I'm not taking chances which might ultimately cost $600 to collect the whole series, just for one Aiko song which may last 1:30. I invite anyone with a little more knowledge on the subject to come forward on this before I empty my wallet again.

So it's bad enough that Aiko's song has been mis-labeled as the 'first' theme song when it isn't, but remember, there's also hope for another song, 'ABC no Kodomotachi', right? Wrong. I wasn't expecting to find it so easily, but 'ABC no Kodomotachi' is on this disc, and it's again done by Kawakami Tomoko. Don't believe everything you read on the internet. There's still hope that a song called 'Midnight Horror School' exists, and that it's sung by Aiko. Otherwise, my sources were wrong, and Aiko should not be credited for 'ABC no Kodomotachi', nor the 'first' theme song of this anime.

Not all is lost, though; the anime seems really cute and done in beautiful CGI. Once I get over the shock I'll have to go back and watch the show. I may enjoy it enough that buying every successor will come with time. Sadly, this DVD is Aiko-free.

Last, as promised, some ground rules for the S.P.A.K.A. site.

I won't enforce copyright of anything I post here. Meaning, unless other rights are reserved (the cropped Aiko pictures, for instance), this site is fully public domain. My only goals with this, as posted before are:

1. to get in touch with Ms. Kayo Aiko and let her know we appreciate her.

2. to encourage continued support for her career in showbusiness.

3. to provide information about Ms. Kayo Aiko to anyone who wants to know more about her.

I'm not doing this for personal gain, except maybe for the chance to shake her hand and tell her 'arigatou' and 'ganbatte'. If you have any information about her, pass it on. It'll help me (and the entire English-speaking world) to be able to sort fact from fiction.

Kayo Aiko's Sixth single...

2009-02-07T22:02:00.002-06:00

was released on December 8, 2004. The title is 'traveller'. There is no c/w.

This was last of the once-a-week singles, and the song was featured as "Ongaku Senshi MUSIC FIGHTER's NAVI POWER PLAY" song for November. Somebody want to tell me what that's all about?

The PV is also the last of the 'hotel' videos, with Aiko playing a separate character in each PV. If you've been watching closely, you've noticed that every time one of the characters walks through the hotel lobby, there is a flock of camera people gathered in one spot, with flashbulbs going off at a frightening rate. Previously unseen was the person those cameramen were cornering. Enter 'Rock Star Aiko'.

Sure, she remembers all the 'little people' she knew before she got famous. But there's no time for that now. Gotta get to the makeup room, gotta sign autographs, gotta get to the video set where the three-piece band backs her up. And they're just a rockin' away, while Rock Star Aiko struts her stuff. And, of course, there's the obligatory closeup shots.

Not much to say about this otherwise, just a good straightforward rock song, and some good shots of Aiko with some lucky makeup-pro who paints her lips, lengthens her eyelashes, and makes her look like the doll that she is. At the end of the video, the on-screen producer yells, 'Katto!', which is Japanese for 'Cut!' and so it ends. And it's on to bigger and better things.

Six more singles to go. Keep checking back!

Kayo Aiko's Fifth single...

2009-02-02T17:58:00.007-06:00

was released on December 1st, 2004. The title is 'ring!Ring!!RING!!!'. There is no c/w.

The single continued the tradition of a new single each week, starting with 'Fantasy', and there's one more after this. The song was used as an image song for Sanrio Co., Ltd. and if you don't believe me, here's Aiko rockin' out with a couple of Hello Kitty characters:

The PV continues the story from the previous two PV's. Aiko's been out partying, broke up with her boyfriend, and now she gets to go shopping! She heads to a MercuryDuo store and tries on a bunch of outfits, and we see lots of snapshots, along with shots of Aiko rummaging around, presumably saying, 'sugoi!' every two seconds.

Not that it's unusual, but she looks really damned good in this video. We also get a lip-sync shot of her wearing a red feather boa, which emanates CG sparkles as she waves it around to the beat. It should be noted that this is a Christmas song, and Aiko uses the phrase 'ring and jingle bells' several times.

This is the first appearance of the really-into-it-backup-singers who go 'HAAAAAAAA!' a lot. Prior to this, Aiko was her own backup; her voice sounds especially good when there are several layers to it, and this effect will return. But I'm not sure why they decided on backup singers at this point, maybe just to speed up production. They make prominent appearances in songs to come, like Orange Road, Yuuki no Chikara, and Runaway Girl, to name a couple. Aiko might be in there somewhere, but you'll never know... they're so LOUD!

The video ends with Aiko blowing a kiss to the camera, which turns into a gold (CGI) heart. I wonder if that happens every time she does that?

Kayo Aiko's Fourth single...

2009-01-20T17:19:00.005-06:00

was released on November 24, 2004. The title is いえないコトバ. It is pronounced 'Ienai Kotoba' and can be translated as 'The Words I Can't Say'. There is no c/w.

This single was released a week after her previous single. The song is a ballad and has the distinction of being Aiko's third-longest recording (5:32). The song was featured as the ending song of the anime 'Samurai Gun'.

The PV puts Aiko at the end of a once-promising relationship with a guy who wears a flannel shirt. We only see the guy from behind; Aiko stares up at him from a park bench at a gorgeous seaside location. He turns and walks away from her. She goes back to her hotel room, where the party people from 'Fantasy' live it up in the next room. Lonely, pouty Aiko gets upset and bangs on the wall (a shot stolen from the previous PV) as if to say, 'hey, some of us are trying to break up with our boyfriends here!'.

She calls 'flannel man' with her cell-phone and he says 'it's over', and she sheds some acting tears as she hangs up the phone. Look, flannel man, it's your loss.

Aiko slumps down in her hotel room which is HUGE by Japan standards, and it probably cost 100,000 yen for one night, so I hope flannel man's paying. Cut to him and he's on a dock, closing his phone, so now he'll probably help Nacchan write a song or something. He walks away and crosses paths with a familiar-looking girl wearing a pink overcoat, tied at the waist, carrying a stack of gifts so tall that she can barely see where she's going.

The guy can't even leave the video without seeing his old girlfriend... wait, wasn't she just on the phone a second ago? Nope, this 'new' Aiko is the third character in the video set, who will be maxing out every credit card she can find in the next PV.

Kayo Aiko's Third single...

2009-01-17T08:29:00.005-06:00

was released on November 17, 2004. The title is 'Fantasy'. There is no c/w.

This single was the first of four singles she released in four consecutive weeks. The covers for all four singles feature a red rope that winds from left to right, and when the covers are placed side-by-side, the rope continues from one cover to the next.

Similarly, the PV's for all four songs are intertwined with vignettes of four different stories, centered around a large hotel.

In the first video, for Fantasy, Aiko plays a club girl who goes out with a gang of friends, male and female. They have a toast with flute-glasses at a table (but Aiko was 18 when this was filmed, so presume these drinks are non-alcoholic). They toss a balloon around their hotel suite and blow off 'champagne-popper' noisemakers. They participate in a giant dance sequence which features what I've always referred to as the 'oh my god, I stuck my hand in the fryer!' dance. See the PV and you'll know what I mean.

This Aiko character is cool, she's happy, and she's out having a good time. But apparently the ruckus that's coming from her hotel suite is bothering another guest. Another Aiko character bangs on the common wall and is trying to say, 'keep it down over there!' We'll find out what that's all about in the next PV.

Fantasy was featured as the ending theme for the TV Tokyo show GAME JOCKEY. I don't know what this show is about, so help me, if you can.

The song itself is a bit of a departure from Aiko's usual style (if she has one), the longest song she's ever recorded (5:38), and even if it wasn't intentional, it's an homage to Avex's early days, awash in Eurobeat.

The original version was recorded by Virginelle, and I've already pointed out where to find the song, but you can find it here. Besides the Eurobeat and the melody of the song, it's very different from the original, much more modern. Aiko starts the song with a run-through of the English-language chorus:

Carry on too many times for love / I only played as ever with your heart
I don't know, it's like a Fantasy / You're only mine, oh what a melody.

The PV is best in full-quality (buy the Aiko Kayohaku DVD!), where the rainbowed lens flares can show up in perfect focus, and you can see all the sparkle in Aiko's eyes. I'd take her to any club she wanted to go to, but over here she'd get a little turned off by all the bump-n'-grind that goes on at our clubs. So, it's back to the hotel room...

Kayo Aiko's Second single...

2009-01-17T08:02:00.002-06:00

was released on April 14, 2004. The title is 愛してねもっと. It's pronounced 'Aishite ne Motto', and can be translated as 'Love Me More'. The c/w track is 'Eyes'.

The PV simulates what it might be like to go on a date with Aiko. She takes you to the record store, then out for some pasta, where she stuffs some spaghetti in your face using a fork (!); then, as a waitress passes by, the camera follows, leaving Aiko with a surprised look as she goes out of frame. When we look back at Aiko, she's mad at us. Very clever concept and a very cute girl. Meanwhile, she fan-dances in front of a red tunnel with two backup dancers who appear in a total of three shots.

The single was featured as the ending song for the anime 'Tenjou Tenge'. The c/w was featured as the ending track of the drama 'Eko Eko Azarak ~Me~', in which Aiko plays the character Misuzu Kurahashi. I've tried numerous times to find an episode of this show but it's not very popular, I hate to say. In particular there are two DVD items on the market, the first being The Director's Cut box set of the whole series, long out of print and at a cost of some $300 USD, if you can find it. The other is 'The Short Story of Eko Eko Azarak ~Me~' which features a behind-the-scenes of the series with a featurette on each of the show's five lead actresses, including Aiko and fellow fetching Kanagawa native Sayuri Anzu.

I rewatched the 'Short Story' DVD the other night and Aiko spends a lot of time with Anzu. Everybody dresses alike (it's a school setting) so it's hard to identify who's who sometimes. Aiko doesn't appear in any of the occult moments with the robes, magic words, and talismans; in fact, one scene shows Aiko popping around a corner to say 'hi' to Anzu just as an apparition disappears. Being oblivious to whatever just happened, Aiko says to Anzu something like, 'did I scare you?' In another scene, Anzu sees a figure on a wall, and Aiko's like, 'what the hell are you talking about?' So it seems she's unaware of the backstory, a kind of giddy character along for the ride. When people get killed, she sees that, so she'll figure it out eventually.

The Aiko footage also shows her recording the vocals for 'Eyes'; although it may be staged, it's being done in the same studio shown on the 'POP' covers. It's the one with the huge mixing board and wall-mounted monitors, probably where she recorded all of her other songs. This footage is one of two occasions that I've seen Aiko's recording sessions; the other is the 'Girl's Box TV' disc from the 'Natsumatsuri' concert DVD, where Kingyo records 'Lover's High' in a much smaller studio.

If anyone can help me out with this series I'd be very appreciative. I found the opening sequence on Stage6 when it still existed, and Aiko has only a quick shot there. I'm not big into drama shows but this is one I'd watch, because Aiko's in it, of course.

I have the original trilogy of Eko Eko Azarak movies and here's the quick story: Kuroi Misa is a new girl in town, everyone says she's a witch, then everyone gets brutally murdered and Misa somehow talks the evil into going away. There's some lesbian scenes, complete with toplessness, so add another lesbian motif to Aiko's legacy. The other two movies -- same thing, mostly, except no more nudity. Guess which one I consider to be my favorite?

Story-wise, the films aren't outstanding. Visually, and as thriller movies, they work. But Kuroi Misa is usually a disappointing protagonist; she finally opens up a can of whup-ass an hour into the third film and it doesn't last for very long. I'm hoping the series is a little more exciting. But my research tells me that it's about Kuroi Misa, and little else. If she ever shows up at your school, house, or workplace, run like hell! Everyone will soon be dead, except for her, and when she fights the evil that's killed everyone else, she'll treat it as some sort of victory. Um, everybody's dead... that's no victory!

Kanagawa and Déjà vu

2009-01-16T16:57:00.005-06:00

Kayo Aiko is from Kanagawa. That's all we know about her origins. If the question was, "what part of the solar system is Kayo Aiko from?" then this answer would be pretty specific. Only problem is that Kanagawa, in the scope of things, is actually quite large. About 9 million people live there, in many different cities. It's like telling someone you're from New Jersey, and assuming that they don't want to know any more (they might not, actually).

Mind you, I'm not looking for the girl's home address (or maybe I am), and I can understand that they're trying to keep crazy people like me from camping outside her house (even though she might live in Tokyo now). But can you at least give us a city? I'm just interested in knowing what kind of traditions her family might have, what the local dishes are, and whether she grew up in the city or off the beaten path. They could even just say, 'she's from a small town in Kanagawa' or 'she's from a big city in Kanagawa', and even if she's from Yokohama, I certainly won't be finding her any quicker. A small town there is, what, 10,000 people, so even then, needle in a haystack. Why doesn't Aiko have any hometown pride?

My best guess is Yokohama, because it's the largest city and therefore the odds are greater for it to be her hometown. Maybe, just maybe, telling people you're from Kanagawa is like openly stating you're from Yokohama; unless you say the name of the town everyone just assumes that's where you're from.

So every now and then I'll be listening to some Aiko song, preferably at ear-splitting volume, really getting into it and in the middle of it all, I stop and wonder, 'what is this I'm listening to?' I'm well-acquainted with all of her songs and anymore it's like breathing -- you forget that you do it all the time, and one day you realize you've been doing it all along without thinking. The melodies are engrained in my brain to the point that I forget that she's Japanese and I'm American.

When I find my bearings and realize that it's Aiko, I hear her wonderful voice and think about how pretty she is, and it's like I'm hearing the song for the first time, all over again. Good music and an outrageously beautiful woman... and that's all I need!

Kayo Aiko's First single...

2009-01-11T19:44:00.001-06:00

was released on December 10, 2003. The title is 瞳の中の迷宮. It's pronounced 'Hitomi no Naka no Meikyuu', and can be translated as 'The Maze in Your Eyes'. The c/w track is titled 'solitude'.

The PV is a making-of style, featuring shots of Aiko messing around backstage, carrying an umbrella in the rain, being made-up on the set, and a closeup shot of her lip-synching the song. Some of the shots are professional but others show a candid side of her which of course is very, very cute. She was 17 when this was filmed.

I believe that her parents are shown in the video; one shot shows a woman carrying some items a few steps behind her, backstage. Another very quick shot shows what appears to be that same woman on one side of Aiko, and a really handsome guy on the other side (which could be her father *or* older brother, I don't know for sure). They look like proud family members, they bear a resemblance to Aiko, and why would the video include a closeup shot of random people at this important moment unless they were proud family members?

The single was featured as the opening theme of the anime 'Yami to Boushi to Hon no Tabibito' (Yami, Hat, and Traveller's Book). Aiko voiced the character 'Reira', some sources I've seen refer to her as 'Layla Mars'. I can't confirm this from the show; Aiko's character is only referred to as 'Reira'. According to the translator's notes, the Reira character was not in the video game but was created specifically for the TV series.

Aiko's character appears in episodes 10 and 11 of the 13-episode series. A synopsis of this series follows:

Hatsumi is a mysterious and flawlessly beautiful young blond librarian who has the power to 'travel through' books. She can live in a book's 'world' with that book's characters, but whenever she has a 16th birthday, she disappears and leaves the characters behind.

One of the characters left behind was Hatsuki, who fell in love with her and now is obsessively trying to track her down, but is always one step behind.

When Hatsuki arrives in a new book, the characters will always give some clue as to what Hatsumi (the one being chased) was doing while she lived in that book. Because she is so beautiful and because there are always mysterious circumstances surrounding her arrival and sudden departure, Hatsumi becomes a legend in every world she visits.

In one of the stories, Hatsumi suddenly arrives as 'Rurau' on a giant spaceship which is full of children travelling on a 200-year journey towards a new home planet. She then leaves just as suddenly, floating out into space all by herself.

Some years later, Reira (Aiko) is a child travelling on that spaceship as it reaches the new home planet. She admires Rurau's legend and wonders what it would be like to float off into the loneliness of space like Rurau once did.

The ship is controlled by an omnipotent computer which acts as the parental figure of Reira and all the children on the ship. The adults on the ship all died a decade ago but remain in their beds, decaying, while the ship's computer simulates their voices.

An emergency is called and Reira bravely volunteers to fix a CO2 tank outside the ship. However, she accidentally severs the tether line and floats off just like Rurau.

Instead of disappearing or dying a horrible death, her boy-crush Ramuro uses a jet-pack to save her and they fly back to the ship together. There they are readying shuttles which will land on the new planet, called 'Rurau', a name picked by Reira.

As a housewarming gift, Reira gets vials of DNA taken from Earth animals, so that they can be recreated on the new planet.

I've suspended my disbelief about everything else, but I have a hard time believing that Aiko could clone animals. You never know, I guess.

Subtitled videos of this series, including the opening which uses the single, are available at youTube and probably elsewhere.

The series has a decidedly mature tone and is centered around a lesbian relationship. It's not violent but there are some conflicts. Throughout, there are many shots of ideally-drawn women's bodies with the least amount of clothing possible.

Even Aiko's character lays in bed with a sheet barely draped over her. I won't give away how the series ends, and I haven't watched it recently enough to be confident in teling you about it anyway. But if Hatsuki finally succeeds in finding Hatsumi, you'd really want to watch what happens next, in excruciating detail. They don't show it to you, but after 7 hours of this series, you can imagine it.

Confirmed!

2009-01-11T18:34:00.006-06:00

I won't get too smug about it, but y'all should be happy that I do this. I'm putting valuable time back in the hands of Kayo Aiko fans, so you don't have to spend the hours I've spent finding and presenting little tidbits like this. Remember this picture?

Without a doubt, from left to right: Kago Ai, Ms. Kayo Aiko herself, and Takahashi Ai. Hence, 'aiaiai.jpg'. Also, Tanaka Reina is the person to their right. So my status as an Aiko expert is upheld, ID'ing Reina gets me more points, and the result is not only confirmation that this is a picture of Aiko, but confirmation that she stood between Kago and Takahashi for this picture well after the Morning Musume audition.

The full image (albeit very small) is this:

And the guide to it (with similar family name sounds circled) is this:

How lame is it that the guide is a better resolution than the actual picture? I've never seen any other pictures of this occasion; you'd think they're out there somewhere.

Here is the page where I found it with description in Japanese. I tried my hand at translating it, but could not do it coherently. The most I can decipher is "on one hand, some of them won the audition, on the other hand, some lost. I imagine they had quite a conversation. Do you suppose the order was intentionally based on the sounds in their surnames, or is it coincidence?"

This blogger is one I can identify with. It looks like he (or she) is an avid photographer of places and structures used in H!P photobooks. If I lived in Japan and had the time, I'd do it, too. So let's go get some Nicola pizza and have Blue Seal for dessert.

Also posing with Ms. Kayo Aiko are some Musume greats:

Iida Kaori, Yaguchi Mari, Tsuji Nozomi, Yoshizawa Hitomi, Ishikawa Rika, Kamei Eri, Michishige Sayumi, and Fujimoto Miki, at least. The entire second gen of Tanpopo is there, for those counting.

Aiko introducing her releases + TV ads

2009-01-11T16:23:00.005-06:00

Here's Aiko, cute as always, introducing her then-new singles and albums:

Fantasy, いえないコトバ , ring!Ring!!RING!!!, and traveller
こころの惑星～Little planets～

彼女はゴキゲンななめ

2nd Album - POP

SCORE!!!

2008-12-31T21:22:00.005-06:00

Marking a record seven posts in one month, meanwhile providing some Aiko information. I finally figured out something that's been bugging the crap out of me since the first time I heard this song (almost three years ago).

At the start of 'Fantasy', Aiko sings something I presumed was English, because I never knew what she said. Looking back at my data, I noticed that the song was originally done by Virginelle. Lo and behold, the first couplets in Aiko's version of 'Fantasy' are from the chorus of the original song. Listen to it here.

Aiko sings (are you ready for this?):

"Carry on too many times for love / I only played as ever with your heart

I don't know, it's like a fantasy / You're only mine, oh what a melody"

Listen to Aiko again, and that's exactly what she's saying. This is the most English she's ever sung on record. I know, it doesn't make a lot of sense, and I know, it's hard to understand Aiko when she sings in 'Engrish'. But I finally figured out what she's singing! And now you can sing along, too.

Then, a few minutes later I discovered this little tidbit. Aiko sits in a cafe during the Aishite ne Motto video, and this same place is the setting for a Capsule video. Capsule was produced by the same guy who produces Perfume, and also did 'cosmic cosmetics'. Observe:

New 'New Year's resolution': acquire all the Capsule music ever made. This stuff is catchy as hell!

新年おめでとうございま~す!

2008-12-31T18:06:00.007-06:00

Well, a happy New Year to everyone out there, and good riddance to 2008.

I've ramped up the site a bit, added tags and a few more links, and hopefully soon should have a respectable fansite going. For instance, click on "English" in the labels to your right, and you'll have four Aiko Kayo songs translated to our native tongue.

Aiko posted on her blog December 31 and sincerely apologized for taking a week off from posting. Basically she said, things have been busy, Cheer Up * Indies recorded its last 2008 show, and that she'll try to be more consistent with posting in the coming year. Also, she asks that we wish her luck for the New Year (ganbatte, Aiko-chan!) and that she'll try her best as always.

I'd like to make the same promise for this blog. I'll stick to posting about Aiko (although if I increase posting, expect a lot of information about some of my other favorites), try to provide as much information as possible about Aiko as soon as possible, and be as generous as I can.

I hadn't noticed that 'Baba' commented on my first LOVERS HIGH review over a month ago, and said "Thanks for writing this". I'm not sure if he (or she) was referring to the movie synopsis (probably the only one available, definitely the most in-depth), or the whole site, but a belated "you're welcome" to Baba, and everyone who might read this. More to come, please check back soon; and while you're at it, see if you can Google some keywords to get my site to come up prominently in the search. I'm in there somewhere...

Finally, I'll post the first picture of Aiko I ever saw: no longer on Wikipedia, but here for posterity. It began my whole obsession, and is therefore responsible for bringing this site to you. You can't look away!!!

Aiko has grown on me.

2008-12-20T02:12:00.004-06:00

Ms. Kayo,

I wanted to share this with the 'net. From early 2004, left; taken about a week ago, right. You sure have changed in five years, but of course, you're still cute as always. I definitely 'aishite ne' you, motto. And not just because you said so. But you did say so.

A Mysterious Picture

2008-12-15T22:45:00.004-06:00

A real and tangible prize (taking a note from the Publius Enigma of Pink Floyd) for anyone who can unravel this mystery: a picture titled "AiAiAi".

This is as high-quality as I've got, and appearing here are unmistakeably Kago Ai, and Takahashi Ai, but who's that in the middle? This Aiko expert says that it is, in fact, Ms. Kayo. But this has not been corroborated. If it's anybody else, my guess is Tanaka Reina. The only problem is that Ms. Tanaka Reina appears to be at the right edge of the photo.

So the mystery is this: if this is indeed a photo of Kago Ai, Kayo Aiko, and Takahashi Ai, then why would Reina (who was chosen at an audition later than Aiko's) be there? In other words, what event is this from? H!P costume experts, I'm counting on you.

And if this is, in fact, from a later event, it's nice to see that Ms. Kayo gets along with the other girls who were lucky enough to be chosen, even a generation later.

Spanish, anyone?

2008-12-12T00:13:00.004-06:00

This just in, spanish chicks love Aiko (more). Not one, but three spanish-language overdubs of 'Aishite ne Motto' (be warned, amateur audio follows):

Milla version

MidnightSingers version

BeMyCaprice version

A Message to Paul Thomas (of 'hello!blog')

2008-12-09T21:10:00.008-06:00

Paul, you don't know me, but we're about to become fast friends in the online sense. Observe, if you will, a favorite subject of mine wearing an appropriate piece of clothing:

Paul, I can see into the future. In it you own a jacket just like this. And it wasn't very difficult for you to obtain. That's right, if you still WANT this, I'm sending it your way, no charge.

That's right, the 2003 Hello!Project Sports Festival (in Osaka Dome/Tokyo Dome) tracksuit has been here in the Midwestern US, safe and sound since August, when Ohta sent it to me.

Many apologies that it's taken so long for me to speak up about it, but I am giving you this gift in celebration of Ms. Aiko Kayo's 23rd birthday (starting 9:00AM Dec 10th, US Central / 3:00PM Dec 10th GMT). No bullshit, it'll be yours to keep.

So I'll put myself in your shoes, and I have a feeling you're asking, 'why'? Allow me to explain:

1.) it's advertisement. If you or any of your readers have any interest in Ms. Aiko Kayo, they might discover this site as a result of this stunt. I'd like some readership.

2.) you said (in no uncertain terms) that you wanted it, but it seemed like you would have a difficult time rationalizing the cost. Well, I had the money, and I bought it specifically to give to you. Money is not the most important thing in the world, and making people happy may not be the most important, either, but I'd rather make people happy than have money.

3.) I wanted it, too. I'm also an H!P fanatic, and like you, I understand the significance of this item. To see it close-up, as well as owning it for some time has been pretty f**kin' cool. This is from the year that Yasuda graduated, and the NON-STOP concert is tops in my book.

4.) thank you, sir, for the hello!blog. I found your site from Wikipedia footnotes when I was looking for (non-existent) news about Kago during her suspension. Fittingly, I also discovered Aiko via Wikipedia, and both she and your blog are precious finds in an otherwise sullen world. Many thanks for making W's 'Arreviderci' available, too... after hearing that, I bought all their recordings.

5.) it's my way of making amends with the Aiko/H!P past. She tried out, she was in the top 9 of 24,000+, and she didn't get the invite. But I doubt to this day that she would have a bad word to say about Tsunku or H!P. I'll do a post about it sometime soon. I discovered H!P because of Aiko's unsuccessful endeavor, wondering who they were, why she tried out, and what was so appealing.

6.) when it comes to this suit, you and I will have a story to tell.

Okay, so it's free, but on a couple of conditions you're likely to agree with:

1.) Please write a post on h!b when you receive this, mentioning my site AND the beautiful Ms. Aiko Kayo, maybe including a picture of you wearing the jacket...

2.) enjoy it. If you don't want it, I'll be proud to keep it, but more than likely will not wear it except in the most rare of occasions.

3.) remember my name (jyoru) and show some respect. From one H!P fan to another, from one Kusumi fan to another, this is to show that there are no political boundaries and no geographical boundaries so great that we cannot bond together as fans.

Paul, you do not want to know what kind of year I've had to get to this point. When I listen to Morning Musume, I just want to break down and bawl my eyes out; I haven't yet, but I may do so sometime soon. It'd be funny if it happened during something so inappropriate as "Boogie Train '03", but when it happens I'll let you know.

The final, most important piece, is that I do not know your address. Please contact me at jyoru1211@gmail.com, if even to turn down this offer, and we can trade information. Please note that I have never been outside the continental US, and if I ever travel I will be going to Japan, rather than merry old England. But if I ever travel to your neighborhood (or you to mine), I'll owe you a beer or six-thousand.

Last, but not least... proof that I have it. The second time I ever put the jacket on, tags intact:

Check out my homemade Minimoni t-shirt!

New Stuff

2008-12-04T21:07:00.005-06:00

A whole month's worth of new Japanese music arrived in one glorious package.

First, there was Perfume's 'DREAM FIGHTER' and I respond with a resounding Hell Yeah to that! The single continues Perfume's musical progression, and the c/w, "Negai" is a slow, hypnotic song that's got me very captivated. It ends with a somber piano rendition of the main theme (an actual piano, perhaps) and doubtless, I'm still very much on the Perfume boat.

Next, Morning Musume released 'Cover You', a must-have tribute album to legendary (well, NOW you've heard of...) writer Aku Yuu. A grand cover album in the tradition of W's first record; though W's covers still kick some unquestionable ass, here's some more songs to find the originals of. Songs like Pepper Keibu (original) and (MM revamped). A quick fan fave is 'Koi no Dial 6700', but there are 14 in total, like 'Dou ni mo Tomaranai' (or check out this version), or: oh-my-god-it's-chock-full'a-Japanesey-goodness 'Pin Pon Pan Taisou'. It seems like a couple of people have heard this song before. Untold numbers of J-kids singing and dancing in unison, with mecha-robots... they really know how to warm my heart. Is that Aya Matsuura MC'ing?

Finally, the first release of all these, SPEED's triumphant return with 'Ashita no Sora' and c/w 'Something New' which may be, in fact, too funky (not possible). Again we get a line like 'Let's go out to the street' (?) Somebody do a bit of research on Okinawa street gangs and reassure me that there aren't rampant amounts of dancing female foursomes blowing each other away for drugs and such.

But brace yourselves, gentle readers; I hate to break this to you, but there is one track I may never listen to again: the 'White Love～STEADY～Body&Soul 2008' medley. If this track serves only one purpose, it's to acclimate our ears to the sound of a much-older SPEED singing our old favorites on their new tour. After that, well...

For good measure, they made sure to employ every available gospel singer to back them up on this one. This isn't their weak spot, and it never was. Always plenty of gospel singers wailing away on some really good SPEED tracks, and even if they're going over the top singing about things like 'Kiwi Love bayayayayaby wowowowowowowowowowowow!' (whatever that means), it'd be blasphemy not to have all them gospellers.

Every SPEED medley, even from back in the day, suffers because the songs contained within are on average 5 minutes at least, which meant they really had a beginning and an end, and the journey was magnificent. To chop them off at around 2 minutes each denies the full force of the message and the spaces between sound like 'fuck it, let's do a different song now'. There's no effort to combine these songs into one cohesive work that matches the profundity of any of the originals.

But my main opposition to this recording is that, look, Hiro and Eriko are ten years older now, and they're not screaming at the top of their lungs like they used to. Which happens to be their old trademark, and what endeared me to those old songs in the first place. Anybody who tries to build a time machine and go back to give them some control or nuance that they didn't have then should be killed before a good thing gets ruined.

Ladies, you're all beautiful and talented, but if this isn't you anymore, don't pretend. Sing a whole set of new songs, throw in the odd oldie here and there. But I'm kinda disappointed that you spent any time on this song, because you already recorded it years ago, and we still have it on CD. And for every imitation you do of your thirteen-year-old selves, I wonder whether it's because you think you can do it better now, or because you think it'll be just as good as it was before (or the third, most likely answer: because the producers demanded it). Seriously, I can put the old (real) 'STEADY' on repeat for weeks at a time if I miss it that much.

I don't mind the new 'heavier' backing tracks that come with the medley, and someday we may get to hear the new music with the old voices. But time has moved on, and as much as I *love* the new songs, no matter how hard you try (with every available technology), you just can't recapture a moment.

Aiko Landmark Tour

2008-11-27T20:36:00.002-06:00

I've spent some time now obsessing over a few short blocks along 国道 'Kokudou' (Highway) 16 in Fussa, Tokyo. Aiko and a photo crew spent a memorable morning or afternoon here, and it makes me wonder whose idea it was... or did they just happen to be there... or was there an intentional nod to the US military on this one?

Fussa is home to Yokota Air Base, not far from where the outdoor shots for the "cosmic cosmetics" cover were taken. Apparently they wandered a few blocks and found everything they needed. So, the complete tour...

Three points of interest:

(1.) Nicola Pizza. They just got a picture of the sign out front, but this link(don't forget to click on the picture for the original photo) shows the whole establishment. From the CD:

(2.) Blue Seal Ice Cream. Started in Okinawa for the benefit of (again) American troops, Blue Seal opened a store here, offering all sorts of unlikely ice cream flavors that Aiko probably digs. Her shoulders are barely taller than the windowframes. I might be able to break a window with my knee, but looks are deceiving. Why didn't they get a picture of her hanging out at 'George's Insurance'? First, Google Maps 'street view':

Aiko stands against the facade (Blue Seal banner in the reflection):

"Gimme a wasabi cone with chocolate sprinkles":

The Blue Seal logo has been (mostly) covered up by the song title.

Finally, (3.) Big Mama American Antiques; first, the cover:

In real life, this is what the place looks like when shuttered. More on that in just a second.

Last photo I'll share for now:

Presented for your consideration is a photo of (most of) the storefront which shows the awning and the shutter system. Store hours shown are 1:00PM to 8:00PM, odd hours, which puts the Google cameras on this street sometime in the morning or early afternoon. If they'd have just waited a few more hours, we'd see the nice woodwork shown here.

All of these, just a few short blocks away from each other. Be like Aiko and spend an afternoon in Fussa. You'd best believe that if I'm ever in the neighborhood, I'll take a few pictures of myself in similar poses.

'solitude' translation

2008-11-24T19:02:00.003-06:00

A post on yahoo!answers gave me the gumption to do a full translation of this song; had I been a little more savvy, I'd have noticed that the answer was 'closed'. No worries, though, it's here for posterity. A few disclaimers and it's on with the show (you can always skip this introduction and just scroll down to the song).

First, I'm only guessing that Aiko sings this to someone in particular in first person, though it seems highly likely. My verb forms aren't very precise, and it's possible that I'm waay off the mark on some of this. However, the romaji is correct, disregarding the spaces between some words (and it can vary sometimes, depending on the translator.)

I try to make my translations follow the original text as closely as possible, so that the English wording is aligned with the Japanese wording. I never combine two lines to make a more fluid sentence structure. Because of this, however, it's easier to pick out the source word(s) and come up with a more precise meaning on your own.

The romaji is a modified Hepburn style which should make sense to beginners and experts alike. The perfectionist in me wants to have it in 'kunrei-shiki' style so that it can be back-translated, but it's harder to sing along with. So all my romaji will be in this style, for future reference. I won't be mentioning this again in future posts, but just so you know.

Last, unless it infringes on other applicable laws, I hereby release the romaji and translation to the public domain, to be used in any way, by anyone, for any purpose. If you repost, please also provide the songwriter credits. Thanks!

solitude

(romaji/translation)

as sung by Kayo Aiko

lyrics (Japanese): Kenn Kato
composer: Y@suo Ohtani
arranger: ats-
chorus arrangement: YAS KITAJIMA

aitakute (i miss you)
aenakute (i want to be with you)
nantonaku uwa no sora de (for some reason i'm preoccupied)
kizuitara muishikini anata wo omotteru (before I know it i'm unconsciously thinking about you)

sou kitto (yes, undoubtedly)
mou zutto (the whole time)
kotae nara wakatteru yo (i know the answer)
sore na no ni akirame kirenai kute, gomen ne (despite that, i must apologize)

hito wa naze todokanai hodo (how can a person not reach their limit)
oikakeru no kana (i wonder if i'm getting through)
saki ni nagedashita no wa (before i throw it all away)
kono watashi, sore na no ni naze (me, despite all, how can i?)

deaeta hi no yasashisa mo (we meet on days with gentleness)
kasaneaeta nukumori mo (overlapping with warmth)
motomerareru yorokobi mo (i'm wanting joy)
maboroshi ni wa omoenakutte (this vision is unlikely)

uso da toka (a lie such as this)
himitsu toka (a secret such as this)
shinjirukoto mo wasurete (i believe i'll forget)
otagai ni samete risuru you ni natte ta (it reaches the point where we blame each other)

hito wa naze fuan ni naru to (why do people get nervous)
shibari tagaru kana? (wanting to tie together, i wonder?)
sore ga touzakeru koto (i guess staying away is a fact)
shirinagara tomerarenai ne (i can understand, but it doesn't end)

jiyuu toka kodoku da toka (if it pleases you, have solitude) ["kodoku"="solitude"]
naimono ne dari de kawaru (it's asking too much for change)
honto wa dochira mo onaji (really, we're both the same)
sou kokoro wa wagamama da ne (because our hearts are selfish)

wakare no hi no samishii sa mou (the days we're apart are sad)
kizutsukeau kanashimi mo (this wound is sorrowful)
kuyami kirenai itami mo (condolence can't be hurtful)
futari dakedo shirushi ni naru (the two of us will get a sign)

hitotsu hitotsu omoide wo dakishime (one by one i hold the memories close)
aruite iku kara (we walk along)
warainagara furimukeru toki ga (we are smiling, the time to turn around)
kuru you ni... (so that it becomes)
zutto... (always)

deaeta hi no yasashisa mo (we meet on days with gentleness)
kasaneaeta nukumori mo (overlapping with warmth)
motomerareru yorokobi mo (i'm wanting joy)
maboroshi ni wa omoenakutte (this vision is unlikely)

Lots of links, Aiko style.

2008-11-02T21:44:00.009-06:00

I just took a Mensa Practice Quiz which says I have a "good chance of passing the Mensa test," but if it only weren't for these two simple facts: one, I *hate* word and number puzzles, and two, I'm too busy doing Aiko research to care. You'll all thank me for doing this, it took a little while.

Seriously, for now I'm done praising everybody else, so it's time for the issue at hand... wait, one more thing... I previewed SPEED's new single Ashita no Sora and it's *damn* good; almost made me cry to see them back together all these years later. I insist you check it out.

Okay, the issue at hand... Ms. Kayo Aiko. Forget wikipedia, it won't tell you anything. Rather, check out her blog (also linked above right), or the blog of fellow Kingyo Nao-chan, or the blog of fellow Cheer Up-pers TONO and Kyan Chiaki, where Aiko is bound to (and does frequently) make an appearance. She puts pictures of *them* on *her* blog, so expect the same from her contemporaries.

Also, see Aiko being a video game nerd for whatever the heck this game is called. Right now there are 18 pages, all accessible from clicking one of the small pictures at the bottom of the main page.

Or, go to youtube for new concert footage, shot about May of this year at Shibuya-O Crest:

Aishite ne Motto

Kanojo wa Gokigen Naname (never seen her sing this live before)

Hitomi no Naka no Meikyuu

Still not impressed? Keep reading. Go to Google Maps and copy-n'-paste the following coordinates for your virtual Aiko tour. Choose "Street View" and pretend you're there. For extra realism, go there in person!

First, a holy shrine for all Kingyo lovers, Azabu West Studio, located at:

35°39'30.21"N, 139°43'30.56"E

the brown building with the recessed entry and Coke machine (and old guy on street) is where LOVERS HIGH was recorded.

Then, head to Fussa on the outskirts of Tokyo for a couple of Aiko landmarks.

The first is at:

35°44'6.52"N, 139°20'25.32"E

and the store called BIG MAMA is where the 'cosmic cosmetics' cover was shot. Took me a while to find this place, and the store is shuttered in the Street View, which covers up the oh-so-famous "American Antiques" wording featured so prominently on the cover. Must've been Sunday when the Google people drove by. But, that's the place.

When looking for that, by sheer accident, I found:

35°44'16.77"N, 139°20'20.19"E

The NICOLA sign (see picture above), which is a pizza place. I have no idea why this was included, but again, there it is. By the way, the caption on the Polaroid above reads "I'm happy even on cloudy day." I would be, too, if I had some pizza!

A Big Plug for Perfume

2008-10-11T14:27:00.006-05:00

If I was to go back in time about ten years to tell my former punk-rock self that my new favorite music is Japanese techno-pop, I might catch a bit of flak. On the other hand, the old me might be intrigued by the idea, and demand to listen to it. As the music I love now would not have been made at that point, it might cause a rip in the time-space continuum and destroy the world.

Since I can't be a time-traveler, I don't spend too much time worrying about destroying my old habits. Rather, I'm spending most of my time designing speakers that are 100 feet in diameter so I can blast the new Perfume record "GAME" and introduce everyone on the continent to its genius.

I first became aware of Perfume after their producer Nakata Yasutaka worked with Ms. Kayo Aiko for her 'cosmic cosmetics' single.

Their style is almost always a mix of candy-pop and hard techno. It didn't take me long to buy a few of their records, namely "Complete Best" and "Fan Service - Sweet", but I waited a long time to receive "Complete Best" because it was selling like crazy all over the world. Despite having never been to Japan, my taste has matched theirs in the past couple of years.

Perfume put out a couple more singles, "Polyrhythm" and "Baby Cruisin' Love" before they released their second record, which is "GAME". After I thoroughly exhausted the "Complete Best" CD and previewing the new singles, I thought that they may have reached their creative peak. Everything after seemed to sound the same to me, and my opinion was that they were releasing the same song again and again, only with new words to fill the chorus section.

So I held off on buying "GAME"; what a BIG mistake that was. One listen and I've become convinced that this is one of the best albums ever made. Every track is good, but the next track is even better! Again, the Japanese share my sentiments: the album and the follow-up single "love the world" both reached #1 over the summer.

I can't think of a group more deserving of such success. Though I've become used to it over time, the first listening of "Electro-World" was an unforgettable experience. It sounded as if a Nintendo had exploded, joined the Beatles, and channeled the spirit of 'Thriller'-era Michael Jackson. In other words, an untouchable electronic hit!

It's notable and fitting that the girls are from Hiroshima. Some 60 years after we caused unprecedented devastation to their future home, Nocchi, Kashiyuka, and A-chan rise from the ashes and show the world how music is supposed to be made. The usual question of 'who is your favorite?' does not come into play; to choose one is to eliminate two other perfectly capable (and desirable) girls from the wota repertoire. They're like the Borg.

But, like most girl-groups, they depend largely on their producer who deserves the musical equivalent of the Nobel Prize for coming up with this stuff. I might be more inclined to go clubbing if they'd play Perfume songs at a deafening volume around here but, sadly, they don't. I'm so tempted to go sneak a song in, just to wake everyone up.

But for now, it's back to work on those giant speakers.

A Word About Favorites

2008-10-04T15:28:00.007-05:00

I spent some quality time this week listening to Morning Musume's gigantic music catalog and along the way I had some revelations which I thought might serve as interesting reading.

Everybody knows (well, now you do) that if I HAD to choose an all-time favorite Musume, I'd choose Kago. Why? She liked to pull pranks and wasn't particularly into education. After about a week of being shy, she had tons of energy and endless confidence. She's got big, dark eyes and an infectious smile, and more often than not was funny as hell. She did impressions of other famous people, some of which were terrible, and some were right on. She played coy with the public, pretending to be oh-so-innocent but couldn't hide that gleam in her eye which only meant that she was trouble (in a good and bad way). Also, her unmistakable voice has a nice 'bite' to it, so whenever she shows up on recordings you can tell it's her right away. Even if I'm listening at the office, I still want to scream "Kago-CHAN!" in time with the music after her lines.

Now that I've said that, this post isn't intended to be a Kago-lovefest. I'll have plenty of those on my own time because I've made my choice and no wota can tell me differently.

In choosing a favorite, I'm not saying that I hate all the other Musume because it's simply impossible to do so. I may like some more than others, but really, all 25 members throughout the group's history have made a positive impression on me and I wish the best to all of them.

Still, anyone who's followed this group has picked their own favorite (sometimes it changes) and I'd bet that the most common reasoning is that "she's better than the others". I could say this about Kago, although many would disagree. So is it all just in my head that every time I watch a video she stands out in the crowd? Am I making it up that her voice is so much more unique than the rest of the group? From a completely impartial perspective, I have to say yes. At some point I made a conscious decision to be 'on the lookout' for Kago, so that when the video (or the song) is over, I can say smugly to myself that she was the standout, and the rest were just there to support her. Other people talk about their favorite member and I think, 'are you crazy?'

Why would anybody pick Yoshi? She's got talent, but always seemed a little too boyish for me (which might be attractive to others). Her voice is unmistakable if you're listening for it.

Why would anyone pick Yasuda? She's got talent but always seemed a little too plain to me (which might be attractive to others). Her voice is unmistakable if you're listening for it.

And so on. Not to pick on those two, because I think that both Yoshi and Yasuda have made the group better, and again, all the members have done that. So why are they not my favorite, and why do I not hear them as individuals when they sing lines of songs? Because they're not Kago, and I'm not paying particular attention to them, that's why.

And, for a completely unknown reason, (eerily similar member) Tsuji never gets a high spot on my list of favorite Musume. She's my second favorite W member, and W always scores consistently high on my favorite H!P group list. She's my third favorite Mini Moni member (hey there, Mari-san!) and Mini Moni always scores consistently high on my favorite H!P group list. But as an individual, I can only tolerate others when they say she's so great; I just haven't felt that way. This anomaly only proves my point that once you've decided who your favorite is, objectivity goes out the window.

Sometimes you get so caught up with a certain member that you forget that others are even in the group. Some, of course, are actually more popular than others, and this depends on a lot of things which I won't even try to list. All in all, Morning Musume is an interesting cross section of the celebrity marketing industry, a topic which could span several hundred pages of investigation; and we, the consumers, aren't as diligent as that when we make choices. No matter how hard the marketing folks could try to push their favorite member on us, we'd still decide on our own who is the most favorable.

So when I say that Kago is my all-time-favorite (if I HAD to choose), I know I won't be converting anyone else to my belief. Maybe, though, she's one of the members you've 'forgotten about' (but not very likely in this case) and you might start trying to notice her a little more.

So if I say that Kamei Eri is my favorite current member -- and she may or may not be -- some who've forgotten about her might wonder what makes her so intriguing to me, and start to see why I would think that. Of course, in the end, it's up to whether I think she's better than the others.

So go ahead and pick your favorite members from whatever group you're infatuated with. Because I could agree or disagree, and any mention (good or bad) only keeps that person in the public eye. As well, they (the marketers) demand that you do, so they can find out what works and what doesn't, so they can keep your wallet open and keep on owning your wota ass. But oh, how great it feels to be owned.

Love for SPEED / Welcome back...

2008-09-26T19:19:00.008-05:00

I won't change anyone's mind on this subject no matter how long I go on, but I could certainly write volumes about SPEED. When I started listening to them (fall 2006), they were already old news but I still became a believer and to this day I'll give them tons of respect and praise because they deserve it.

If you're not experienced in the ways of SPEED go find some videos and come back later; this'll still be here when you're done.

For those who already know them let me just say: fuck yeah, SPEED is BACK! A new single, あしたの空, arrives November 12, 2008.

From the beginning in 1996 to their first breakup in 1999, twelve singles in a row sold over 500,000 copies each and "White Love" has come close to two million. What more can I say?

First, they're powerful. A savvy city manager could save money by foregoing traditional tornado sirens and just have SPEED go outside in bad weather. Together they would yell "Seek shelter now! Save yourself!" and anyone within a ten-mile radius would be able to hear it.

Second, they're cool. They don't care what you think and had they not gotten popular, would still dance and sing for their own enjoyment. And they'd do it better than you, amateur!

Third, they're all gorgeous.

Fourth, they're from the streets. I guess. I'm not sure what streets exactly, but apparently life at the Okinawa Actors' School is rough. That's why SPEED has songs like "My Street Life" and lines like the one in "April", "without your love/I must go out to the streets". Sorry, I'm not buying this, but a lot of their music has 'urban' overtones. Can anyone tell me why?

Fifth, even if they don't care, they've got fans everywhere. Even though they were 13 years old on average when they first performed and people probably scoffed, "what can they do?" they made everyone shut the hell up from minute one. They both dance and sing live without waivering, and somewhere Tsunku stands in front of a chalkboard at his girl farm showing SPEED videos to all his talent and he says, "do this! This is what we're after!"

Marketers, take note. With their independent and strong image they are great role models for young girls (who buy their records). With their sexy and cool image they are beyond attractive to young men (who buy their records). Everybody loves hard beats; sure, we all do. And with this marriage of girl/guy worship comes sales, sales, sales, and popularity.

Two videos put the whole thing in perspective. This video shows a record shop clerk who has no idea that the girls in his presence (Takako and Hitoe) have sold more records than his whole store contains. Nor does he respond when they invoke the name of SPEED but I hope he's since gone home and looked them up, to his bewildered surprise.

Another video (which I'm having trouble finding) is a live performance of 'White Love' where an overexcited (presumably young female) fan cuts through the beauty of hiro's final line to scream "hiro-chan!" As damaging as it is to the recording, it's obvious that this fan is in euphoria, and to this day, all of us wish we could have been there to scream the same thing.

Welcome back, SPEED. Show us how it's done -- not a moment too soon.

Love for Koha-chan

2008-09-20T21:11:00.010-05:00

At its conception, a rule of this blog was to not mention any other artists besides Aiko and after a long interval I finally figured out that this was unrealistic. As the old cliché goes, rules were made to be broken, and I've broken it four (count 'em, four) times so far just for reviewing the Girl's Box film. Maybe it appears I've gone on for too long about the film, but it is what it is and it's likely the most extensive, if not the ONLY review of this film in the English language.

My attention now turns to some other artists; the purpose is to show that I have other musical interests besides Ms. Kayo Aiko, believe it or not. Since some of the artists I want to talk about may already have a lot of English-speaking fans (or naysayers), I realize I'm treading on sacred ground with this. Before we get started, understand that I'm not trying to alienate anyone who feels otherwise about them, I'm just sayin'...

So: Kusumi Koharu, a.k.a. Koha-chan; the only 7th Generation member of Morning Musume, and the H!P solo artist with the longest (and most unnecessary) 'official name' (which is >deep breath<, 'Tsukushima Kirari starring Kusumi Koharu (Morning Musume)') as if 'Kusumi Koharu' just wasn't unique enough. I know what it means, of course, but what a mouthful.

It was only a couple of months ago that I bought her album 'Kirarin*Land' off iTunes, after hearing a sample of 'Konnichipa' and saying (to no one) "this'll scare the rats off the porch." Note that I have no porch or a rat problem, but if I ever do, "Konnichi pa pa, Konnichipa!" It was on a whim that I bought the whole album, really, and now it's hard to imagine a world without it.

From what I've read, most people either LOVE or CAN'T STAND Ms. Kusumi, and there's no room in between. Some people can get really mean when they talk about her and I can understand both sides of the argument. On the one hand, she *always* acts like, "look at me, I'm SOO cute, can you stand it?" She sings as if her audience is a bunch of 5-year-olds who've said, "we don't understand your language" and she's responding like most of us would and saying the same thing again, only LOUDER and MORE PRONOUNCED, because that does the trick, right?

Let's look at the facts. A lot of parallels have been drawn between Kusumi and Gottsan, in that (a.) they were both the only new member to join MM when they each joined, and (b.) both were considered to be the 'ace in the hole' by fans and management alike (though Gottsan has arguably done more for the group's popularity so far). After that, their similarities end. Gottsan, complete babe that she is, was far calmer about her looks; she was probably just as surprised at her sudden popularity as everyone else. And that's what attracted a lot of fans to her, I'm guessing, because she seemed so approachable and down-to-earth. Doesn't sound like Koha-chan at all, now, does it?

No, Koha-chan is an entirely different brand, but in her favor, she knows what that brand is and she does it well. It took a little getting used to for this wota, but in the long run, she could probably murder my dog in cold blood, (note: I have no dog, but if I did...) show no remorse, and my reply would be only that "what Koha has done is good!"

In summary, to all the people who love to hate Ms. Kusumi, I offer this: if you can't stand hearing catchy ultra-pop music sung by an unapologetic, completely extroverted girl who appears to have more than a few loose screws, this is not the musume for you. Instead, there are a variety of other musume (that we'd be happy to show you) which may be more suited to your taste. It's a big group.

Next, some firepower for those who love to love Ms. Kusumi. She acts like a crazy person but deep down she knows exactly what she's doing, so attached is she to your wallet. She knows that "OH-MY-GOD-LOOK-AT-ME-I'M-SO-CUTE-ALL-THE-TIME" is something that may come off as annoying to some, but she doesn't care about the haters. She'll just go on feeling *ten times* as cute and *ten times* as talented as the rest of the group, and nothing will knock her off that cloud, because it's arguable -- and not an outright falsehood -- that she is. In addition, as a singer I can vouch for her singing talent, as she uses a wide variety of vocal style and pronunciation (see 'talking to foreigners', above; see also "Konnichipa" for extremes of vocal manipulation). This makes her voice easily recognizable in the sea of helium-huffers better known as Morning Musume. (I'm a huge fan, don't get me wrong, but someone should tell them that their recording studio is filled with helium.)

Koha's not the best singer even in her talent agency. A listen to 'Sansan GOGO' shows that the other two girls in the group may have better control, notably in the second-verse line, "Omoikkiri ni suikon dara" sung by Sayaka. But as hard as they are trying to be noticed, they just haven't got the Star Power that Koha has, and in my mind, she's stealing the spotlight even *if* the others deserve it more.

Ah, Ms. Kusumi, you've got bigger fans than me, I admit. You're 16, which is a little below my tolerance level for the list of 'girls I like to stare at'... wait a minute... Risako (14)... Miyabi (16)... Saaya (14)... I'm kidding about that one. But if you've been paying attention, Aiko (22) is my ideal star. So I feel a little embarrassed about watching you kiddies run around, but when you and all the others I've mentioned get a few years older, look out! Also, note that I carry a huge torch for hiro; although she's now 24 she was 15 (!) when SPEED broke up.

So, the point to my ramblings (if there is one) is this: I started out thinking that Kusumi Koharu had some catchy tunes, and maybe I'd put them on once in a while. Well, I bought 'Kirarin*Land' and MilkyWay's 'Anataboshi' from iTunes, and after deciding it was really good, I bought her first album 'Mitsuboshi' from CDJapan, along with the 'PaPancake' single. While I may have had second thoughts about buying up all this Kusumi stuff, the three "People who bought this also bought" recommendations at the bottom of the CDJapan page were all Aiko singles. "Well," I thought, "I'm in good company." And I don't regret buying any of her stuff. I can put on an album and let it play, because nothing needs to be skipped. In fact, several days in a row I've listened to her entire catalog in the span of a few hours -- this is how listenable this stuff is to me.

Yes, I get lost in these recordings and consider them to be of highest quality despite any apparent flaws, because whoever chooses her songs has really made sure that they match her style and personality. It's also notable that a lot of her music *wasn't* composed by Tsunku.

But what Aiko fan wouldn't love a song called 'very! berry! strawberry!' or think that a song called 'Spaghetti' wouldn't be entertaining? For the record, 'Konnichipa' WOULD scare all the rats off your porch (and make your neighbors think that Myron Floren did some *weird* collaborations) and the sound of bursting fireworks at the end of 'Koi Hanabi' is so perfect, it gets me every time. If I had to pick a favorite, 'Olalala' would be at the top of the list; apart from it being a good chillin' tune, the faux French that she sings is simply beyond adorable. A new word should be invented to describe how adorable it is. Were it possible to hollow out the syllable "pa" from the line "nu bu zankiete pa" (Ne vous inquietez pas!), build a home there, and live in it, I'd live happily ever after.